Introduction
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About Author
Elliot Wren
Chapter 1
Ang gabi ng tag-init sa Lungsod ng Maynila ay malagkit at mainit, puno ng isang malabong pakiramdam sa hangin.
Si Luna, na lasing na, pagkapasok pa lang ng bahay ay agad naupo sa sofa, nakapikit ang mga mata, hawak ang noo, at tila ba nahihirapan.
Ako rin ay medyo lasing, pilit na nagpapanatili ng kaunting ulirat, nagbuhos ng isang basong tubig at inilagay sa mesa sa harap ni Luna. "Ma'am Luna, uminom ka po ng tubig para mawala ang tama ng alak."
Habang nagsasalita, sinipat ko ang paligid. Ang bahay ni Luna ay simple pero eleganteng nakaayos. Sa sulok ng dingding ay may isang plorera ng berdeng orchid, na nagpapakita ng kanyang mataas na panlasa at pagkatao.
Sa gabing puno ng malabong damdamin, kasama ang babaeng aking pinapangarap, naguluhan at nagulantang ang aking isip.
Binuksan ni Luna ang kanyang mga mata, kinuha ang baso ng tubig, at tiningnan ako ng kakaibang tingin.
Nang makita ako ni Luna, bumilis ang tibok ng aking puso at nag-init ang aking katawan.
Tahimik si Luna, nakayuko habang umiinom ng tubig, at bahagyang nanginig ang kanyang katawan.
Bigla akong nakaramdam ng pagka-mababa, tila ba napakababa ko sa harap ng aking malamig at marangal na babaeng boss.
Pagkatapos ng ilang sandali, pinilit kong pigilan ang aking nararamdaman. "Ma'am Luna, magpahinga na po kayo."
Tahimik pa rin si Luna, nakatitig sa sahig. Tumayo siya, bahagyang pasuray-suray, at naglakad papunta sa kwarto.
Paglingon ko, narinig ko ang isang malakas na tunog ng pagbagsak. Si Luna ay natumba sa sahig.
Agad ko siyang inalalayan at pinaupo sa sofa, at umupo na rin ako sa tabi niya.
Maya-maya, tinakpan ni Luna ang kanyang mukha gamit ang kanyang mga kamay, yumuko, at nagsimulang umiyak nang tahimik.
Si Luna ay umiiyak, at tila may malalim na sakit na nakatago sa kanyang puso.
Nataranta ako. Ang aking diyosa, ang aking magandang boss, bakit siya biglang umiiyak? Nakakaawa siyang tingnan.
Hindi ko alam kung paano siya aaliwin, kaya hinaplos ko na lang ang kanyang balikat.
Parang hindi pa rin gising si Luna mula sa kalasingan, bigla siyang sumubsob sa aking mga binti, patuloy na umiiyak nang tahimik, at nanginginig ang kanyang balikat.
Bigla, bumilis ang daloy ng aking dugo at nanginig ang aking katawan. Ang paghaplos ko sa kanyang balikat ay naging masuyong paghaplos.
Ang kanyang pag-iyak ay parang kutsilyong tumatama sa aking puso.
Isang di-mapigilang bugso ng damdamin ang dumating. Nag-ipon ako ng lakas ng loob, biglang niyakap si Luna, itinaas ang kanyang ulo, at hinalikan ang kanyang mainit at mapanuksong mga labi.
Parang nasa kalasingan pa rin si Luna, hindi niya binuksan ang kanyang mga mata, hinayaan lang ako sa aking ginagawa.
Blangko ang aking isip, puno ng kalituhan. Habang hinahalikan ko siya, ang aking mga kamay ay naglakbay sa kanyang katawan. Pagkatapos ng ilang sandali, binuhat ko si Luna papunta sa kwarto. Hindi siya tumutol, bagkus ay yumakap pa sa aking leeg, na lalo pang nagbigay sa akin ng lakas ng loob.
Lahat ng ito ay nangyari nang biglaan, ngunit tila ba natural lang.
Sa malambot at malawak na kama ni Luna, hinayaan ko ang aking sarili, ngunit medyo nahihiya pa rin ako.
Wala akong alam tungkol sa mga bagay na ito, wala pa akong karanasan.
Habang naguguluhan ako, tila ba ito'y plano ng tadhana. Ang aking unang beses ay hindi sa aking kababata na si Pina, kundi sa aking magandang boss na si Luna, na kakakilala ko lang ng isang linggo.
Ang gabing iyon ay nagbukas ng bagong pahina sa aking buhay. Sa piling ng isang babaeng mas matanda sa akin ng sampung taon, mula sa pagiging isang inosenteng binata, ako'y naging isang lalaki.
Ang gabing iyon, unang beses kong natikman ang sariwa at nakakakilig na pakiramdam, na nagdulot ng matinding kasiyahan. Sa wakas, nalaman ko na may mga bagay na hindi ko akalain ay sobrang saya. Hanggang sa magbukang-liwayway, ako'y bumagsak sa tabi ni Luna at mahimbing na natulog.
Nakatulog ako nang walang kamalay-malay, walang panaginip.
Pagkagising ko, wala na si Luna sa tabi ko. Ang liwanag mula sa bintanang bahagyang nakabukas ay nagpapahiwatig na umaga na.
Agad akong bumangon, si Luna ay nakabihis na, nakaupo sa isang upuang malapit sa kama, tahimik na nakatingin sa isang larawan sa tabi ng kama, tila ba nag-iisip ng malalim.
Tinitigan ko siya, at sa kalat ng kama, naalala ko ang nangyari sa amin kagabi.
Biglang naalala ko ang aking posisyon, at nakaramdam ng kaba at pagkalito. Agad akong nagbihis.
Habang nagbibihis ako, tahimik lang si Luna, nakatingin sa akin ng malalim.
Nang matapos akong magbihis, ako'y tumayo sa harap niya, parang batang nagkasala.
Pagkatapos ng ilang sandali, nagsalita si Luna, "Ikaw ba'y unang beses?"
Nahihiya akong tumango, puno ng kahihiyan.
Tahimik ulit si Luna, at napansin ko ang kanyang mukhang puno ng pag-aalala at paghingi ng tawad.
Medyo naguluhan ako, at narinig ko siyang bumuntong-hininga, "Pasensya na..."
Nagulat ako, tinitigan siya, at nakita ang mas malalim na pag-aalala at paghingi ng tawad sa kanyang mga mata.
"James, pasensya na, hindi ko alam na ikaw ay..." malungkot na sabi ni Luna.
Tinitigan ko siya, ang magandang babaeng ito, ang aking boss na nagbigay ng makulay na kabanata sa aking buhay. Nag-flashback sa aking isip ang mga nangyari kagabi...
Nagulo ang aking damdamin, at biglang sumigaw, "Ate Luna!"
Sa pagsigaw ko, naramdaman ko ang matinding pagmamahal at pagkahumaling kay Luna.
Sa sandaling ito, nakalimutan ko na siya ang aking mataas na boss. Nakalimutan ko si Pina. Sa sandaling ito, naramdaman ko na ako'y isang tunay na lalaki.
Bahagyang kumunot ang noo ni Luna, tinitigan ako ng malungkot, at mahinang nagsalita, "James, huwag mo nang isipin, lasing lang tayo kagabi. Umuwi ka na."
Habang naririnig ko ang kanyang mga salita at nakikita ang kanyang mga mata, biglang sumakit ang aking puso.
"Ate Luna, ako..." nagsimula akong magsalita, ngunit itinaas niya ang kanyang daliri sa kanyang labi at marahang umiling.
Tinitigan ko siya, at patuloy na sumakit ang aking puso. Gusto kong sabihin sa kanya, "Mahal kita."
Ngunit bigla kong napagtanto ang aking kalokohan. Paano magkakaroon ng ganitong kabilis na pagmamahal?
Ngunit hindi ko mapigilan ang aking sarili. Sa tagal ng pagsasama namin ni Pina, hindi ko kailanman naramdaman ang ganitong matinding damdamin. Hindi ko kailanman naramdaman ang ganitong tindi ng emosyon.
Ito ba'y tunay na pag-ibig?
Maaari bang dumating ang pag-ibig ng ganito kabilis?
Nalito ang aking isip, at nakita ko sa mga mata ni Luna ang kanyang hindi matitinag na desisyon. Kahit masakit, wala akong nasabi. Lumabas ako ng bahay ni Luna na puno ng pagkalito at kawalan ng pag-asa.
Paglabas ko, bigla kong naisip, bakit walang lalaki sa bahay ni Luna? Bakit nga ba?
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Those were the actual words that broke the camel's back.
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I should have run. Instead, I signed my name and sealed my fate.
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About Author
Elliot Wren
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