Introduction
昇進によって、ジェイコブ・カレロの近くで働くことになった。若くて途方もなく魅力的な彼は、遊び人の大富豪として悪名高い。私は彼の右腕として、起きている時間のほとんどを彼と過ごすことになってしまった。彼こそが私を狂わせかねない人物だと気付くまでに、それほど時間はかからなかった。しかも良い意味ではない。私たちは正反対だ。彼は衝動的で自信に満ち、のんびりとした性格で支配的。深く考えることなく気軽な恋愛を楽しむタイプ。一方の私は強迫的で内向的、そして用心深い。
彼の気楽な態度にもかかわらず、ジェイコブは私の冷静な外面を突き崩せる唯一の人物だ。私の閉ざされた態度や冷たい物腰に動じることもない。でも、どんなに望もうと、彼を心の中に入れることは全く別の話。辛い過去のせいで、私は男性に対して警戒心を抱いている。もう誰かに近付かれて傷つけられたくはない。
しかし、ジェイコブ・カレロは断られることを受け入れない男だ。彼は私の仮面を見る、ただの他人以上の存在になりたがっている。私の防壁を突き破る方法を学びながら。
どうすればいいのだろう。
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About Author

Leanne Marshall
Chapter 1
私はペンシルスカートとグレーのテーラードジャケットを整え、廊下の鏡を見ながらダークカラーのリップを直す。諦めたような表情で、小麦色の髪がきれいにまとめられた高い位置のシニヨンを確認する。ため息をつきながら、深呼吸して胸の中で渦巻く不安を抑え込む。
これでいいだろう。
自分の姿を細かく観察し、冷静な効率性と威厳あるグレーの装いに満足する。内側で渦巻く感情の動揺は微塵も見えない。目を細めて、完璧な鎧に何か欠点がないか—はみ出した髪の毛、ほこり、しわ—を探す。何一つ見逃さない。
私は自分の姿を愛することはなかった。若々しい外見、冷たい青い目、ふくれた唇。でも今日は、高い地位にあるボスのパーソナルアシスタントとしての役割にぴったりだ。外見上は、すべての細部が整い、衣服が完璧に整った、プロフェッショナルさと有能さを醸し出している。私はいつも本当の気持ちを隠すのが上手だった。
慎重にゆっくりとした動きでスティレットヒールを履き、壁に片手をついて体を安定させる。部屋の後ろで動きを感じ、反射的に鏡をチェックする。
「おはよう、エムズ。わぁ、相変わらずプロフェッショナルね」サラは部屋から出てきながら、あくびを抑え、子供のように拳の甲で目をこする。休日のこんな早朝に起きているなんて珍しい—彼女は朝が苦手なのだ。
だぼだぼのピンクの部屋着を着て、短く漂白したブロンドの髪が四方八方に突き出ている彼女は、努力せずとも愛らしい。あの陽気なエネルギーの塊に愛情を感じずにはいられない。彼女の明るい青い目は早朝の疲れを隠せず、彼女は私をじっと見つめ、おどけた笑みを浮かべている。私の好みには少し近すぎるほど。
「おはよう、サラ」軽く微笑みながら、彼女の熱心な視線を無視しようとする。姿勢を正し、床からブリーフケースを取り上げ、目的を持って私たちのオープンプランのアパートメントへ歩み寄る。サラの前でさえ、自分の優雅さと振る舞いを強く意識し、自分が観察されていることを知っている。神経の緊張感を押し下げ、胃の落ち着きのなさを抑える。
「忘れないで、ボイラー修理のために10時までにはここにいる必要があるわよ」彼女が居間エリアに向かって後ろからついてくるのを見ながら注意を促す。彼女の好奇心旺盛な視線から気をそらすためだ。スケジュールをチェックリストのように頭の中で確認することで、今日の不安以外に集中できる何かを得る。
「知ってるわ。知ってる!冷蔵庫にメモ貼ってたでしょ?」彼女は遊び心たっぷりにくすくす笑い、再び目をこすりながら忍耐強い表情で、ほとんど甘やかすような表情で眉を上げる。彼女は年齢よりずっと若く見え、時々私は彼女と一緒に学校に通ったことを忘れてしまう。正直なところ、最近では私はルームメイトというより彼女の保護者のような気分だ。もう一度ため息をつき、内側で育つ不安を抑え、勇敢さの小さな微笑みを浮かべる。
「忘れないでね」厳しい口調だが、彼女は反応しない。彼女は私の真剣な口調と私たちの生活の几帳面な組織化に慣れている。彼女は私がそういう人間だと知っている—すべてをコントロールし、すべてを整えることで、より有能だと感じるのだ。
「忘れないわ。約束する。今夜まで仕事ないから、ここでのんびりして...多分Netflixでも見まくるかな」彼女は何気なく言い、白とグレーの明るいキッチンをゆっくりと移動しながらコーヒーを入れる。もう一つの眠そうな、明るい笑顔で、彼女は私が今朝早く洗った棚のマグカップを自分のために取り上げる。彼女がスペースの中で、そして家にいるときの彼女の領域で、カジュアルで自信に満ちた動きをするのを見ていると、穏やかな気持ちになる。
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About Author

Leanne Marshall
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