Chapter 95

I narrow my eyes at Orion when I see him stiffen in his chair, see his lips flicker like he is fighting a snarl. His eyes move past me to where Anton and Beatrice are presumably sitting, on their own stupid date. But I resist the urge to turn too – even though it’s one hell of an urge – and instead keep my eyes set on the Prince.

“I guess you’re right,” I say, leaning back in my chair and folding my arms over my chest, unhappy about it. “I guess if we’re fated mates it doesn’t matter...”

But my words fade away when I see Orion’s chest begin to heave a little bit as he refocuses his eyes on me now, his eyes narrowing, his mouth flattening out into a thin line. Because…is he…is he angry?

Honestly, what the hell is happening right now? Orion – it’s been a long time since I’ve seen him pissed like this, but that’s the only emotion I can match to his expression.

“Juniper,” he says, his voice all snarly and low. My eyes go wide, my shoulders setting back as I watch him hold out a hand to me as he slowly stands. “Come here.”

I turn my head slightly, looking at him askance, my entire body tensing as I sense that…something is up. “Why?”

“Because,” he growls. “You are my mate and my bride. And I’m not going to stand for this anymore.”

My wolf, to my chagrin, perks up a bit at this. I snarl a bit, smacking at her rump, but she just nips at my hand.

What? she says, grinning. He’s hot. I’m interested. Take his hand, let’s see what happens.

Inwardly I roll my eyes at her and do no such thing.

“Sorry, wait,” I ask, folding my arms across my body and contrarily tucking my hands close to my sides, “I need clarity. What is it that you’re not going to be standing for anymore?”

“For you looking at a dead boy like that,” Orion growls. “When I’m standing right fucking here.”

I stare at Orion for a moment, my mouth falling open.

Clever boy, my wolf says, trotting around proudly in my soul. I knew he’d figure it out eventually.

Figure what out!? I shout at her.

Oh, you’re so stupid, she sighs, even as she continues to trot around.

But then I spin in my chair to look at the dead boy in reference, wanting to fix my eyes on him – to get his opinion, which is always so steady and right –

He’s look at me too, of course. There – always there when I need him – his eyes locked with mine over stupid Beatrice’s head.

But I only have a moment to stare – not even long enough to figure out what Anton thinks, let alone what I think – before Orion’s big hands wrap around my arms, pulling me up out of my chair and against his chest. I gasp when he bends low, one of his arms wrapping solidly around my thighs beneath my ass before he lifts me – actually lifts me! – up against his chest so that I’m eye-level with him.

And then, to my shock, Orion brings his mouth to mine and kisses the hell out of me.

At first I gasp as his mouth moves against mine, his other hand moving upwards to wrap possessively in my hair, to hold me still. But then slowly my eyes close and I…

I don’t know. Let it happen? Let him kiss me, let myself try it, and feel it, and see what the hell is there.

And, I mean, it’s a really good kiss, but…

Not the boy we want to be kissing, my wolf sighs, sitting down hard on her rump, howling off into the distance, searching for someone else.

And suddenly a great swell of sadness rushes through me because…

It’s impossible, isn’t it?

Impossible.

Because he’s…

Well, he’s not alive, and flesh and blood, and wrapping his arms around me, eagerly trying to get me to love him, is he?

No, the boy I want is not this one here in front of me. And it fills me with an aching sadness because I’m well aware that what Orion has said before about the prophecy is right – that we probably are fated to rule this stupid world together.

Even if I want someone else by my side.

And he, I suspect, does too.

I raise my hands to Orion’s cheeks, pressing my palms to his face as I pull away, breathlessly sad, shaking my head.

He just stares at me, shocked and I think…angry and devastated and confused. And jealous – that I can almost feel.

Jealous as hell.

Orion – has he ever been jealous before? Has anyone ever given him occasion to be jealous, or have all the girls he’s met just immediately said yes?

He stares at me for a long moment, wordless and motionless.

“Orion,” I whisper, my voice squeaky with exhaustion and sadness and my own confusion. “Can you…can you please take me home?”

“Juniper, this date barely started –“

“’Ri,” I sigh, shaking my head at him, drifting a hand back and running my fingers through his pretty hair. “This date…it never began. Besides I think…” I sigh and bite my lip. “I think you wish someone else was here too.”

Orion sighs and looks to the side and I smile when I see a little whistfulness there. Orion - he is clearly thinking about someone else too.

God, what the hell are we going to do?

“Okay, June,” Orion murmurs, sighing again as he lowers me to the ground. “If that’s what you want.”

“Yeah,” I say, leaning close to him and slipping my hand in his as I turn towards Beatrice and Orion. “Let’s go.”

“You’re not going to mind breaking up their date?” Orion asks, dry, glancing down at me as we start towards the pair. Anton’s eyes are already on us, of course. He gets to his feet, wary and curious.

“Oh, no,” I say, breezy even as my fangs emerge, just barely pressing into my bottom lip when I smile. “I won’t mind breaking their date up at all.”

The next morning I wake up before Anton, which isn’t unusual. Even if today it is…weird. We’re both curled up uncomfortably on either end of the couch. I forget to breathe, a little, as I watch him continue to sleep, curled up all uncomfortably with head pillowed on his sprawled arm. My eyes move over him, taking in the slight rise and fall of his chest and shoulders, the slight part of his lips…

But then I blush, and look away, and bury my stupid head in the couch cushion and resist the hearty urge to scream out my frustrations there.

The date ended so awkwardly last night with me just saying I wanted to go home because I didn’t feel good. And then Anton wanted to know what didn’t feel good, and Beatrice protested that she wasn’t done with the date, and I snapped at her that she damn well was.

And Anton had just laughed as Orion vanished us back to this room and left us alone here. We didn’t say much, just sat on the couch for hours just…being here. Neither of us made the move to go to the bed - we just put on movie after movie to wile away the hours because neither of us wanted to talk about the fact that we had both been on dates with our should-be mates last night.

And neither of us fucking wanted to be there.

That we had both just wanted to come back here and be with each other because this is the best place in the world, and the only place I ever damn well want to be, right here by his side.

I shake my head, my face smushing against the cushions, because none of this makes any sense at all. Because how can I want to be here – right here – and nowhere else, and still feel this fucking awkward right now?

I’m laying here, two feet my sleeping weird transparent blue handmaid, thinking about his damn gorgeous face, not knowing…what the hell to do.

But now, after I’ve…admitted what I’ve admitted to myself!? This secret thing that I’ve –

Oh, would you just say it? My wolf interrupts, groaning, rolling over onto her back and stretching her legs languidly in the air. You big baby. Just admit it.

Fine, I snarl at her. Fine. I admit it.

Admit what, she urges, all teasing.

I snarl, turning my head to glare hard at that stupid idiot ghost laying over there. My stupid horrible wonderful perfect fantastic –

Just say it! She snaps at me, giving me a hard nip.

Fine! I have a crush on him! I shout in my soul, groaning and turning my face back into the pillows, hating myself a great deal even as my wolf howls in delight, kicking her feet into the air. I have a god damn crush on my god damn ghost boy. And what the fuck am I supposed to do about it now!?