Chapter 128

“If…if it were possible,” Blythe says, still looking down at his feet. “I’d like to be reincarnated…soon. I don’t want to go back to the Dead place – I don’t think I was really…there. And I don’t want my memories, if you please. I want to…try again. Start fresh.”

Life hums, considering, and then nods. “It can be done, boy. If that is what you want.”

“Does that really…matter?” Blythe asks, looking up at her, curious. “What I want?”

“No,” Life says, shrugging and making me snap my gaze to her. “But your Goddessling has asked a boon of me. And forgive me, child, but you are…not particularly consequential in the upcoming struggles for cosmic power. So, I am inclined to grant your request.”

He nods, his mouth pressing together. “Then that’s what I would want,” he says quietly, bowing again. “The fresh start.”

A little cry breaks from me at the thought – at the realization, really, that Blythe…I mean, he’ll be reincarnated. But the man I know – the first man I ever loved – the sweet squirrel who has been traveling with us – he’ll be gone. Erased from the world – from all worlds – his soul somewhere, in some place, where none of us can find him or see him again.

Agony runs through me at the idea that if Life reincarnates him right now, I will lose him forever. Be witness, in a way, to his true death.

Blythe looks up at my noise, his brows raising as I cross to him. “Blythe, please,” I beg, shaking my head. “We – we care about you! We can find a way to do something else, I don’t want to end it like this – you didn’t even get a chance to live! To try again!”

“June,” he says, his throat working hard, shaking his head. “It’s best –“

“It’s not –“

“If I may?” The Goddess’s words slice through our conversation, sharp and true like a fine blade. We both turn to her, surprised, even as tears start on my lashes.

Life turns slightly, circling her hand in the air. We all watch as the blank space shimmers for a moment before an an image appears. My eyes go wide as I watch a very beautiful woman standing before a sink, crying as she washes the dishes.

Tears start down my own cheeks at the real grief on her face.

A man steps up behind her and puts his hands on her shoulders. When she cries harder he reaches out and turns off the water, pulling the woman back against his chest and wrapping his arms around her, holding her as she cries.

“Do you recognize these people?” Life asks, turning to Blythe.

I turn to him too. He nods, tears slipping down his own cheeks, even as he refuses to move his eyes from the image, clinging to it like it’s incredibly precious to him. “That’s my mom,” he says, his voice breaking on the word. “And my dad.”

“That’s them now,” Life says, turning to observe them. “They mourn you, Redman. They were very young when they had you. They’ve been trying to have another child to quell their grief.”

Blythe nods, hanging his head, sniffing hard. I snap him into corporeality in that moment, unable to bear it, and reach out to take his hand. He squeezes mine back but doesn’t look at me.

“Redman,” Life says, soft and low, demanding his attention.

He exhales slowly and raises his head.

“Would it suit you, perhaps, to be that child? To try again, as you say? And give your parents a second chance as well?”

Tears run freely down Blythe’s cheeks as he takes a shuddering breath and squeezes my hand. “Yes, please,” he whispers, his whole body trembling. “That would be…that’s too kind. I don’t deserve it.”

Blythe doesn’t see it but the Goddess nods, her face gentle.

She shifts her eyes to me, letting me know that we have just a moment before she grants his wish. I tug hard on Blythe’s hand, pulling him slightly off balance and into a hug.

“Good luck, Blythe,” I whisper, pressing my eyes shut, holding him close. “I think it’s good. I think it’s right. I’ll miss you – we all will – but…we’ll know where you are. And you’ll be with family.”

Blythe cries harder now, his shoulder shaking as he holds me tight. “I’m so sorry, Juniper. I don’t deserve it – I should have been better –“

I shake my head, pulling back a little, giving him a big smile even as I wipe at my wet cheeks. “Nah, Blythe, don’t think like that,” I say, beaming at him, shaking my head. “You’re the reason I’m here. You started all of this. I owe you a great deal.”

He laughs a little, rolling his eyes at the idea that he can take any credit. But I just press a hand to his cheek and wish him luck and grace and good fortune. A little power pulses through me as I hope good things for him, but I let it pass, not having real time consider what it was or what it meant.

“Juniper, could you…could you maybe visit my mom?” he whispers. “Tell her…I don’t know, in a way that she understands, what to expect when the next kid is…exactly the same as me?”

I laugh a little and nod, grinning at him.

“And…please ask her not to name me Redman,” he whispers. “It’s such a weird name –“

I laugh at this and give him a little shove away. He laughs too and then takes a moment to say goodbye to Anton and Orion and Laila, to whom he gives the most lingering hug. She cries freely, holding onto him and wishing her little pet squirrel well in his new life.

When we’re all done, Blythe steps forward towards the Goddess. Faiza stands behind her, arms folded, looking incredibly bored. I grin at that, glad that one of us is able to keep it together.

“Ready?” Life asks, giving Blythe that same sweet smile – so different from the stern visage on her statue.

“Yes, Lady,” Blythe says, again bending into a low bow.

She sighs happily and steps forward, taking his face into her hands and bidding him rise. Then she presses a kiss to his forehead. As she does his whole body shifts, fading from grey to brown to a brilliant golden light and then disappearing into the air.

I sniff hard when he’s gone, leaning all my weight against Anton, who holds me close. “Is that it? Is it done?”

“Yes,” Life says, turning her eyes to me, folding her hands in front of her. “His mother will discover soon that she is with child.”

“And what will happen after that?” I ask, sniffing again and wiping my cheeks.

The Goddess shrugs. “I don’t know. It is not for me to see the future.”

“Okay, well you’re not reincarnating this one,” I say, reaching out an arm and crossing it in front of Anton, frowning ferociously at the Goddess of Life.

Anton laughs a little, pushing my arm down, but I snap it back up.

The Goddess laughs too, sounding so remarkably like her son that my head spins a bit. “I had no intention of reincarnating Anton. To begin, he did not request it. And then…it would be a silly act.”

“Why?” Anton asks, speaking for the first time in a while. I drop my arm then, letting him have the space, though I stick to his side like a little burr. “Why is that…silly? Can I not be reincarnated?”

“Do you wish to be reincarnated?” Life asks, looking at him with an expression that is too bland, too innocent. I narrow my eyes at her, suspicious.

He laughs and shakes his head. “No,” he says, placing a determined arm around my back, his fingers curling around my waist and pulling me close to his side. “I’m staying with this one, whatever that means. Even as a ghost.” He smiles down at me and I beam up at him. “If that’s the best I can get.”

My heart sinks at the thought because…I mean, I want him by my side. But as a ghost? Really? Is that…honestly the best we can get?

“Oh, Anton,” Life says, shaking her head at him, her lips pressed together in something close to disappointment. “Why settle for that?”

“What?” Anton asks, spinning his head to his mother, his mouth turning down into a frown.

“Well, why don’t you just…go get your body?” she asks, gesturing towards the door of the temple like he somehow left it out there tied to a street pole like a dog outside a shop.

We all just stare at Life, completely lost.

“Aunt,” Orion says finally, stepping towards her. “What are you talking about? How can he just…go get his body?”

“Well, where is it?” she asks, rolling her eyes, laughing a little. “Where did you leave it, Anton? It’s not like it can die.”

Again, silence reins.

For way, way too long.

“What…what are you talking about?” Anton whispers, his form flickering in and out of corporeality as either he panics or I do – I can’t tell which.

Life takes a moment to stare at him and then takes a step forward. “Anton, have you seriously not figured it out?”

“Clearly not, mom!” he snaps, his voice raising high.

“So, you’re not just biding your time as a ghost because you’re largely impervious to harm in this state, and because you want to stay here at Juniper’s side? She leans forward and stares at Anton like he’s a bit silly.

“No, I patently am not!” Anton nearly shouts. “What – what are you talking about!? Is that an option!?”

“Oh, darling,” Life says, laughing and reaching to place a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it fondly as she shakes her head. “Don’t you see? You’re my child – it’s not that easy to kill you, sweetheart. As it stands you’re only…” she screws her mouth to the side, looking for the words to explain it. “Just barely dead. Not actually dead. Not like the rest of them.”

She shrugs like it’s completely simple.

But the rest of us just stare at Life in complete and utter shock because…

“W-what the hell does that mean!?” I sputter out, utterly appalled.