Chapter 84

Kaine

My head pounds as I think of what to do about Ember. None of the guards I’ve considered promoting to Captain have my trust, but I can’t trust her anymore either. I replay my earlier conversation with Jake, considering his words.

He seems to think that Ember was right to order the mission, even after I told her to wait. She was able to successfully surprise the estate, I can’t deny that. I sigh and lean back in my chair.

Why hadn’t she just waited? All of this could have been avoided if she had given me more time. I would have agreed to another estate visit eventually, probably.

I groan in frustration. As it stands, I can’t allow her to maintain her role as Captain. She had disobeyed me.

More than that, I reprimanded her in front of the other guards she brought on the mission. Word spreads fast at the palace. I’m sure every guard at the palace is now aware of her misstep.

If I let it go, I will seem weak. My stepmother’s slander has been garnering more attention than I care to admit. I cannot afford to look weak right now.

I stand and start walking toward my office door. I need sleep before I can make any concrete decisions. Before I can make it all the way across the room, I feel a deep primal tug from somewhere inside.

Shit. I can’t afford to lose control, not now. I finish making my way across the room, but instead of leaving the office I lock the door. It won’t stop me from getting out if I lose full control, but I can at least avoid anyone coming in.

I turn to move back to my desk, but Rafe pushes forward, nearly taking control. Rafe, stop.

Rafe’s growl is ripped from my mouth as I struggle to stay in control. “You’re not losing it. That tug is our mate. I’ll back off but you need to go to her.”

I pause assessing. It doesn’t make sense. We’ve been mated to Bianca for months and our bond has dulled. Why is the connection growing again now?

I feel the tug again. The same intense pull I felt the night Bianca and I met. The why doesn’t matter, Rafe is right.

I glance at the clock before unlocking the door and striding out into the hallway. Bianca should be in her room now. Good.

I make my way through the maze of corridors before finally coming to a stop in front of Bianca’s room. I tried my best not to let our lack of connection bother me, but now that it’s back I smile. This is what having a mate should feel like.

I pound on the door. “Bianca!”

She pulls it open and before I can think I sweep her into my arms pressing my face into her the crook of her neck. I freeze. It’s not her.

I release her and take a step back. Bianca looks up at me beaming, but her face falls when she sees the expression on my face.

“What’s wrong? You seemed so happy a second ago. What’s happened?”

I shake my head, backing further into the hallway. If my mate isn’t Bianca, then who is it?

A low growl leaves my throat, and Bianca takes a step back. She lied about being my mate. She tricked me and robbed me of a relationship with my fated for months now.

I start to see red, but Rafe’s voice is frantic in my mind. “Ember. Find Ember.”

I swear as I realize that Rafe has been right this whole time. No wonder he’s been pissed. I turn and run down the hallway in the direction of Ember’s room.

It’s been her the whole time. I think of how I have been treating her. Fuck.

I increase my pace, practically sprinting. After what feels like an eternity, I reach Ember’s room and beat on the door.

There’s no answer so I knock again, harder. When I don’t hear any movement inside, I try the handle and find it unlocked.

The moment I push open the door I am overwhelmed by the scent of her that clings to every inch of the room. My mate. I think about the night I caught her scent on my jacket.

I recognized her scent from the night we met but I had made excuses, thought that maybe my wires had gotten crossed because they are twins. It smells the same now, like tea and honey and that incomprehensible thing that has me itching to find her and never let her go for the rest of my life.

I close my eyes. How could I have ever thought that my mate was Bianca.

I step inside. “Ember?”

There’s no answer so I call out again. “Ember!”

I turn to leave thinking that she’s probably in her office but stop when I realize how empty the space looks. I head further into the room and see that it’s been completely packed up.

I think back to her words from a few weeks ago. My stomach drops. She warned me that this was coming.

Ember

I blink back tears as Robert and I exit the palace gates. My time here had been complicated, full of exhaustion and heartbreak, but the palace had felt more like home than anywhere else. I can’t help but think of the irony of my departure.

I have only ever wanted to be a guard. Everything I’ve done my whole life was to work toward that goal. Kaine being my mate made everything so much more difficult than it had to be.

I fought so hard to hide the mate bond from Kaine in order to keep my position in the palace. I lied and I snuck around, and I spent my life’s savings to keep the secret. I denied myself the hope of having a mate, not allowing myself to even consider that it could work out.

I had done all of that and for what? I’m leaving anyway. I feel bitterness begin to creep in, but I force it away.

I may not be a guard anymore, but I still have Nara. If Kaine had discovered that I was his mate and rejected me, I would have lost her forever. My suffering was not for nothing.

I run my hand over my stomach, imagining my future pup. I love the little one growing inside me so much already. I won’t resent them. I can’t.

I smile wondering if the baby will be a boy or a girl. Either way I hope they have their father’s dark eyes, a reminder.

I don’t hate Kaine. I don’t think I could even if I tried, but his lack of trust in me only confirms that I can’t trust him with this in return.

I believe that he will be a good leader when it’s his time to step up and lead our Kingdom, but staying and hoping he chooses me over Bianca is not worth the risk. I pray to the goddess that our pup inherits all of his good traits, and by leaving now, I hope I can outrun the bad.