Chapter 144

Aldo

Layla stared back at me with those heart-melting doe eyes and a desperate look that was seconds away from starting a whole new argument.

“Then I guess that makes me selfish too,” Layla said firmly.

A short laugh escaped the back of my throat when, really, all I wanted to do was break down. I was both angry and relieved that I still had her in my life. I was anxious and hopeful. Scared and desperate to keep things together.

I’d never say it because that would be beyond unfair and cruel. But I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I ever ended up losing her. Her or Eli.

I had barely managed to survive walking away from her all those years ago...There was no chance in hell that I would survive losing her a second time. Both of us knew it too.

“The Marcello family legacy is its own poison,” I said coldly. “It seeps into the best kind of person and destroys them from the inside out.”

Layla vigorously shook her head. “You can’t say that!” she cried.

“It’s true,” I pressed. “Look what it did to you.”

Her eyes glossed over and her bottom lip trembled. Goddamnit. I hadn’t wanted to make her upset. That wasn’t the point of this conversation. But there were things that needed to be said.

We couldn’t dance around the subject anymore without causing further harm.

Although I wasn’t keen to know that Layla had been silently suffering under my watch for so long, I was glad to know that her (DID) was considered mild. Of course, it didn’t change the fact that the whole matter was caused because of her association with the Marcello family.

I truly believed that this family came with its own curse.

The reason why the violence and bloodshed had gone on for so long was that no one had ever been able to escape the madness. Power and control came with a nasty price.

Layla briefly closed her eyes and took in several deep breaths to collect herself. She kept clenching her hands into fists, trying to keep her own anger at bay.

Honestly, I sort of wished that she would let it all out. I wanted her to purge the ugly feelings she’d been storing up. Whether it be directed at me, personally, or at the Marcello family as a whole.

She needed an outlet if it meant preventing any more slips.

“You cannot say that the Marcello family is poison,” she said tightly. “Because what would that make your son?”

My eyes went wide. All the air became stuck in my lungs as I stood there, stiff as stone.

“What the fuck does that mean?” I hissed.

“Eli is a Marcello—by blood! So does that mean that he’s doomed to become some heartless, venomous killer too?”

Fuck. How could she even think to ask something like that??

I gave her an incredulous look. “Jesus Christ, Layla—”

“How is it any different from what you’re saying?” she asked. “We all know that it affected me horribly because I don’t know how to properly handle any of it.”

“No one should have to handle it at all!” I countered back harshly. “Don’t you get it? You should never have had to protect Eli that way in the first place. You shouldn’t have needed to place your finger on the trigger...”

“Aldo.”

Her voice sounded so far away. Layla took a few steps closer to me and tried to reach out to grab my hand. The feel of her soft touch was the only thing anchoring me.

“You can’t tell me I’m wrong,” I said. “You have to resent the Marcello name for what’s done to your life and your career.”

“I won’t lie. It is difficult, to say the least when I think about all the times one of us was put at risk,” she said. “Yes, I’ve been forced to make terrible choices that no one should ever have to make. It’s changed me, alright? I’m willing to admit it. But what am I supposed to do about it?”

The awful feeling in my chest grew.

“If I try to suppress the feelings then they end up hurting me in other ways. If I don’t suppress the feelings then this fucked up person I, unknowingly, built will come out instead,” she huffed. “So, tell me. What am I supposed to do?”

Pack up your belongings. Change your identity. Take our son and escape this endless void of a life...Save yourself before things get any worse.

It was what any normal person would do. Again, we were lucky that her case was only mild. But, what was essentially keeping it from getting any worse? Nothing.

We both knew that there were always going to be risks. As long as she and Eli were tied to this family, neither one of them would ever be safe.

“I don’t know,” I whispered. For a moment, I allowed myself the reprieve by simply looking into her eyes. Anyone could get lost in the gorgeous blueish-green orbs for hours and not even know it.

I mindlessly lifted my hand to cup her cheek. “I’m so sorry.”

Her eyebrows furrowed. “For what?”

“Everything. Sometimes, I still wonder if you and Eli would have been better off without all of this insanity.”

Layla’s features pinched with disagreement. “That’s not true,” she said. “You and I both know that if you hadn’t stepped in, Eli and I would have been killed off a long time ago.”

I sucked in a sharp breath and clutched at her waist, pulling her into my chest. I hugged her as tightly as I could without running the risk of actually hurting her.

She was right, without a doubt.

I felt her words against the inner curve of my neck. “You’re not taking the blame for what’s gone on, Aldo,” she said. “I’ve made my own choices and had to bear the consequences of them.”

“It doesn't make it right,” I stated. “You shouldn’t have had to lose your career for this family.”

“Agent Carter is the reason I lost it—not the Marcello family. He knew about my free clinic. Even if I decided to spill my guts out about the family to him, there was no telling that he wouldn’t have turned around and revoked my license anyway.”

She had a point. Agent Carter was still too much of a mystery for any of us to pinpoint.

“Still. You tried doing a good thing and this is what happens,” I muttered darkly.

“Don’t get me wrong, I am deeply upset about it,” she remarked. “I feel as though the last real tie to my previous life has been severed. Now, I don’t really know what to do with myself.”

I nodded my head and continued to hold her close.

“Why don’t we try and figure it out together?” I asked. “Layla, would you please move back into our room? It’s become impossible for me to actually find any form of sleep when you’re not there.”

The corner of her mouth pulled upward. “Okay.”.

“Come on then,” I said. “It’s getting late.”

I kept my hand securely on her waist as we left my office to head toward the bedroom. While I wanted to feel better about how things were between the two of us, there was still an ongoing feeling of doubt and hesitation.

And in the end, neither one of us was willing to ask the infamous question.

What were we going to do now?