Chapter 74

“Love has no place in royalty.” Nicholas tilted his head down and lowered his gaze. “I will be forced to marry the best Luna candidate in the Choosing Game. I can only hope that, at the very least, perhaps a sense of friendship will blossom later.”

“And Lilliana is the best?” I asked.

He sighed. “She is the one my father has chosen for now. It could change over the course of the competition. His whims can be fickle. But what would it matter? They are more or less all the same.”

My heart broke at his words. Hearing this usually confident man so… complacent – so accepting of such an unwelcomed fate – tugged at my emotions.

“I want children,” he continued. “I believe that my life will be fulfilled enough with family, even if I can’t be with a partner I would have truly wished for.”

I shook my head, refusing to accept it. “No one should turn away from their heart so fully.”

“I don’t have any choice, Piper.”

I took him by the arm and shook him. He was well-muscled, he only wobbled a bit and likely only to appease me.

“You do. When you are King, you can –”

“I need to be married to be King.”

Oh. Right. I had forgotten about that and deflated a bit. But it still couldn’t be hopeless. There had to be some way for Nicholas to appease his family while still marrying the person he wanted – whoever that may be.

As for my jealousy, surely I would be able to contain it if I knew Nicholas was with someone who he loved, who was his match in both generosity, spirit, and heart.

Though no one here truly seemed to fit those qualifications. Except perhaps Susie, but she was happy enough with her own choices.

“I truly don’t have any choice,” Nicholas said.

“I’m sorry,” I told him. “I just can’t accept that.”

He sighed. “You’ve always been stubborn.”

Maybe, but… “Especially when it comes to you. I care about you too much to see you throw your life away, even for the sake of the kingdom.”

His gaze lifted to me. Under the bright sunlight, the green flecks in his eyes seemed to sparkle. He was unbelievably handsome. I could easily stare at him forever.

“I’ll help you find someone,” I said. One of these girls had to be alright, somewhere under the surface. If I really looked closely, gave them more chances…

He gave me a tight-lipped smile. It was sad, and didn’t last more than a second or two.

“It has to be Lilliana,” he said.

My brow pulled together. “Because the King chose her? Surely anyone here would suit, if we –”

“Not just anyone would suit him, I’m afraid.” His gaze lingered on me a beat longer in silence, before he dropped it away.

“There you are,” said a voice too near us. I glanced up to see Lilliana approach.

I had been staring at Nicholas so intently that I had not noticed her drawing near.

“I was looking for you, Prince Nicholas. I didn’t see the two of you sit down.” Her face was blank, with a dull smile on her face.

I wondered briefly if I should stand so she could sit, but then pushed that thought away. We were equals here.

Nicholas, however, did not feel the same. He quickly rose to greet her. “Hello, Lilliana. I’m sorry to have disappeared on you.”

“I have found you now. You need not apologize.” She did not look at me once.

As the only one sitting, I felt awkward and stood as well, to join them.

Finally Lilliana glanced at me, but only for a moment.

“You were so brave back there, Nicholas.”

“Thank you. Linda has a tendency to push too far, I’ve noticed.”

“I’ve noticed that too,” Lilliana said. “She pushes too far.”

“Right.” Nicholas tightened his jaw.

“Well, she certainly did in this case,” I said, inserting myself into their conversation. “I would never hurt anyone.”

Lilliana looked at me blankly.

“I believe that,” Nicholas said.

Then Lilliana added, “Yes, me too. Piper would never hurt anyone.”

I frowned. This conversation felt… odd. Like attempting to speak with a puppet, she only ever seemed to emulate what Nicholas had said.

Secretly I wished Nicholas would say something outlandish, if only to see if Lilliana would agree. He was too good of a man for that, however.

If only Lilliana had taken to Julian instead. He would have had a field day amusing himself with her mindless compliance.

“The cooking challenge for Linda was very inspired, Prince Nicholas,” Lilliana said. “You are very intelligent.”

Nicholas looked absolutely miserable standing there, frowning so deeply, eyes downcast and away. “Thank you.”

“I’m so lucky to be your favorite,” she said, side-eyeing me.

And though she had meant that, I’m sure, as both a claim over him and a slight to me, I was relieved to see any type of personality formulate in her. Pity, it only manifested in such a contemptible way.

“Yes, that does make you quite fortunate,” I agreed, just to get her to ease off that line of thinking. Nicholas looked a half minute away from digging a hole in the ground just to bury himself in it.

“If you recall,” I continued, showing even more leniency, “I am Julian’s favorite.”

“Ah.” She didn’t sound particularly impressed. “Where is your prince? I am surprised that he did not stand up for you, as Nicholas did.”

Not everyone was as stout-hearted as Nicholas. I wondered if Julian would have stepped in eventually – likely before they chopped off my head, maybe. Whenever the situation stopped being funny to him, most likely.

Watching the way Lilliana interacted with Nicholas, with her constant agreeing and complements, I felt more and more terrible for Nicholas. There had to be some way I could save him from this fate.

I knew he wanted children, but… how could he wish to tie himself so permanently to someone like this? Even for the sake of the crown?

The kingdom was important to Nicholas, in ways I didn’t and couldn’t comprehend. I tried to remember that.

But, to give up his whole sense of self…?

Nicholas wasn’t my boyfriend. He hadn’t been for a long time. But I could never forgive myself if I walked out of his life forever knowing how miserable he would be.

I would find a way to save him from this fate somehow.

Later, after we’d eaten lunch in the gardens, we were alerted that the kitchens were ready for Linda’s personal challenge. Nicholas, Lilliana, and I walked down to them together, though we became separate just inside the door.

Joseph grabbed my arm roughly and pulled me to the side.

“You will stand here with me, in case you get any wild ideas,” he said gruffly. “From here, any sabotage you have planned will not escape my notice.”

“I have no sabotage planned,” I said.

He grunted, obviously disbelieving me.

“You better enjoy this free time you’ve been having,” he said. “Because it’s all about to come to a close.”

“I didn’t do anything, and soon enough you will see that.”

He shook his head. “There isn’t anything that will keep you out of the dungeons, sooner or later.”

Sooner or later. That sounded like a threat.

Like he knew I hadn’t done anything to Linda’s food, or to hurt the Queen.

He was just waiting for me to make a mistake, any mistake, and then he would pin any negative outcomes all on me.

He smirked at the fear that was likely on my face. How was I supposed to fight against the Captain of the Guard?

“I’ll see you rot down there.”