Chapter 200

Damon

Two Years Later

The snow swallowed all the sound. Only the crunch of boots and the wet rasp of dying Rogues broke the silence.

I moved through the clearing like a wild animal. My blade flashed once, clean and efficient, and another body hit the ground with a dull thud. The air reeked of iron and frost, a perfume I’d grown too used to.

Zane growled low in the back of my mind, hungry for more. Again.

I didn’t hesitate. The next Rogue lunged, snarling, and I met it mid-charge. Bone cracked beneath my hand, and then the forest was quiet again.

When the last of them fell, the stillness pressed down hard on me. Even the trees seemed to hold their breath. I wiped my blade in the snow, but it didn’t matter. The scent of blood clung to me like a second skin.

My guards lingered at the edge of the clearing, watching. None dared speak until my new second finally stepped forward, voice tight.

“Your Majesty, the Rogues are scattered. We’ve found nothing. No trail, no message, no sign –”

“Then keep looking.” My voice came out more growl than man.

He hesitated. “The men are exhausted, sire. And the Council’s been calling for you. Asher…”

I turned toward him. “Asher what?”

The Beta swallowed. “There’s talk of him wanting to take your seat at Court. Temporarily, he says. Handling state matters in your stead.”

I said nothing for a long moment, just listened to the wind slide through the trees. I’d expected it. Asher had always coveted my power, waiting for an opportunity to take it. Still, the idea of another sitting on my throne while I endlessly hunted for my mate burned deep.

“He can’t keep the throne warm until I return,” I said, “he’ll fail, just as he failed me in finding my mate.”

The Beta bowed his head and stepped back. Ronan never would have submitted so easily. I walked past him, through the bodies, feeling nothing but rage and desperation.

The forest stretched ahead, blanketed white and endless. Every hunt ended the same: blood spilled, no trail, no whisper of Lila’s scent.

I wanted to believe Asher’s promises, that the Rogues would find her. But he’d brought me nothing, and I’d long since stopped trusting anyone but the beast inside me.

I’d felt her energy flare once. A surge through the bond of heat and light flooding every part of me. It had been strong enough to drive me to my knees.

And then, just as suddenly, it was gone. Sealed so completely I wondered if I’d imagined it. Now there was nothing there.

Zane prowled restlessly in my mind, snapping at my doubt.

She’s out there, he snarled. I can feel it.

“You’ve been saying that for two years,” I muttered.

Then keep listening until we find her.

I did. Every night. Every hunt. I listened for her heartbeat in the quiet of where the bond should be, for her laugh in the wind. I found nothing.

Still, I couldn’t stop. The thought of giving up felt worse than admitting she was likely dead.

At the ridge above the valley, I paused. The moon hung high, painting the snow in silver light. From here the battlefield almost looked peaceful; white flecked with red, like the land itself was healing from what I’d done on it.

My hand tightened on the hilt of my blade until my knuckles ached. Pain was something I could still control.

“Find her,” I whispered to the wind, to the Gods, to the bond that no longer answered me.

A distant howl rose from the trees, and Zane answered it in my head, his grief tangled with mine.

By the time I returned to camp, the snow had turned to sleet. The tents sagged under the weight of it, the air thick with smoke.

My men kept their distance, speaking in low tones around the fires. They thought I didn’t notice the way they flinched when I passed, the way they stopped saying her name the moment I drew near.

I didn’t blame them. The King they followed was barely a man anymore.

I ducked into my tent, shaking the snow from my cloak. The air inside was warmer but stale from too many nights spent pacing, unable to sleep.

My blade lay across the table, still streaked with blood I hadn’t bothered to clean properly. I dropped into the chair and stared at it.

My reflection glimmered faintly on the steel, eyes pale gold in the lamplight. There was a time I would’ve recognized the man looking back at me. Now, he was a stranger.

I’d ruled over empires, commanded armies, bent lesser Alphas to my will. None of it mattered. None of it filled the emptiness Lila left behind.

The bond used to hum quietly beneath everything. Her heartbeat echoing through my own, faint but steady. It had been my compass, my tether, even though it gave me no direction because it was so suppressed with the poison.

The night it flared to life I dropped to my knees and I knew Lila was truly alive.

For a single breath, I’d felt her fully, more than ever before. She flooded every corner of my chest. And then, as quickly as it came, it was gone.

Like someone had slammed a door between us.

I’ve fought wars, faced assassins, watched men die screaming. None of that hurt the way this did.

I leaned forward, pressing my elbows to my knees, my hands to my face. My pulse thudded in my ears, slow and heavy. The sound of it mocked me. Still beating thought I felt dead on my feet.

Zane prowled restlessly. She’s alive, he growled again, quieter now, like an animal nursing a wound. I felt her too.

“She shut us out.” My voice came out raw. “If she was alive, she would’ve come back.”

Maybe she can’t.

That thought hit hard and I closed my eyes. For an instant, I could almost see her with her hair loose around her shoulders, eyes full of defiance, mouth soft and enticing all at once. I longed for the way she used to look at me when she was angry and loved me anyway.

I gripped the edge of the table until my knuckles went white. “If she’s out there,” I said quietly, “I’ll find her.”

I rose before I realized I’d moved. The air in the tent felt too small, too thick to breathe. I shoved the flap open, letting the icy wind slap me in the face. The cold grounded me, but barely.

I tipped my head back and stared into the void above me, daring the mating bond to answer.

Nothing.

Still, I could swear I felt something shift deep in my chest, the faintest tremor, a heartbeat too far away to latch on to.

Zane went still. Did you feel—

“Yes.”

It vanished again before I could breathe it in. I stood there for a long time, letting the cold soak drill into me.

When I finally turned back toward my tent, the decision was already made.

I would return to the Palace and resupply, then ride north at first light. And if I had to tear the world apart to find Lila, I would.