Chapter 86

Shana POV

"I think I had a realization today too," I said to Lucas as we talked. It was time for both of us to be candid and vulnerable to each other. I didn't want this topic to keep coming up because quite frankly, I was sick of it.

I hoped that this would be the last time I ever had to talk to Lucas about this because it just felt like we were going round and round in circles.

"I don't think I've been fair with you. Your father has been telling you how to live your life, and I realized that in a sense, I was doing the same thing."

"How so?" Lucas asked, cocking his head to the side in question.

"Well, I don't fully understand your lifestyle. I don't know what it's like to be you. I don't know all of the trials you had to go through with Kendrick over the years. I don't know what it's like to be an heir. All I know is that the way he's treating you is wrong."

"But you aren't doing the same thing, Shana. You're just sharing your opinion on the matter like a good friend would. You're offering me your advice."

"I shouldn't be so hard on you to make the right decision though," I spoke sincerely. "I just want you to be able to stand up for yourself."

"It's just all the pressure," Lucas said. "If I do the wrong thing, I don't know what he'll do."

"I get what you're saying, Lucas," I started, my voice honest but full of worry. "But doesn't it feel weird treating marriage like a business deal? Your dad shouldn't get to decide your life for you."

"I know, Shana." He sighed as his fingers tapped on his thigh as he regarded me. "It's just... everything is so complicated."

"You keep saying that. This is complicated, that is complicated." I leaned in, resting my chin on my hand. "I want to better understand you. What's so complicated about being honest?"

"Well, there's history, family legacy, respect, order — all that stuff. My dad thinks that if I get married to Victoria, our family will be like this ultimate powerhouse. It's an investment to him, one that he thinks will increase our assets tenfold." As he met my gaze, his eyes held a whirlwind of emotions.

My brows knitted together, a bit of annoyance bubbling up. "But Lucas, your happiness should come first, right? Who cares about family alliances if it makes you miserable?"

"I wished it could be that easy, Shana. Really, I do." Lucas's face scrunched up. He dipped his head down and I watched as water droplets fell to the floor. "But it isn't. There's so much at stake. Reputation, business ties..."

I laid a gentle hand on him, hoping that he'd see things from my perspective.

Why was it so hard for him to just take a deep breath and relax, and look at everything from the outside?

"I get it, Lucas. But your own happiness matters too, and in my opinion, that's even more important," I urged. "You're a kick-ass Alpha in your own right. You should make choices for yourself."

There's so much more that I had sitting on my chest, I decided to let it all out.

"You're going to be stepping into the business one day. While your father might not appreciate you going against his word, I think he'll see that you're someone who stands their ground. You're firm and go for what you want."

Lucas stared at me unblinking, processing everything that I was saying.

"And that's an admirable quality," I continued. "People respect others who get things done their way. Just look at how successful your father is by living off that mindset. He's created an entire empire that he gets to pass on to his only son one day."

"You've heard about my brother, right?" He looked down again and more water fell to the floor. "He died when he was young."

My heart softened at where this conversation was headed. "Yeah, I've heard him be mentioned a few times."

He nodded and paused as if he was scared to keep talking about him. And just when I thought he wasn't going to say anything, he looked back at me.

His blue eyes carried a mix of sadness that pained me to witness.

"Sometimes, I feel like I'm trying to make up for what he could have been. Like I'm living his life for him."

I swallowed, feeling the weight of what he must be carrying on his shoulders. "Lucas, you're your own person. You don't have to measure up to someone else's potential."

"Do you really think so?" Lucas asked.

"I do," I said. "I know Kendrick always compares the two of you, but your brother isn't here anymore. He died young. How could he measure up to you? You've had more time to learn and grow into the excellent Alpha that you are."

He looked at me, his gaze searching mine. "Shana, that really means a lot."

We let the silence linger, the weight of our unspoken feelings creating a charged atmosphere. And then, as if he'd reached a decision within himself, Lucas met my eyes with a newfound resolve.

"These past few days have shown me something, that I should've seen a long time ago," he said, his voice firm. "All this business and my dad's expectations... they don't matter as much as you."

"What are you trying to say, Lucas?" I asked, feeling a flutter of hope spark inside of me.

I honestly had no idea where he was going with this.

"I've had a lot of time to think these past few weeks, and speaking with you now about everything... It's just so clear to me what I should do." He took a deep breath, meeting my gaze unwaveringly. "I've made up my mind. I want to end the engagement with Victoria."

"You're serious?" Relief surged through me, and I couldn't help the happiness that spread across my face. "Really? You're going to end the engagement with Victoria?"

"Yes, Shana." He nodded, his eyes full of unwavering happiness. "It's time for me to take your advice and do something that I've wanted to do for a very long time. I don't want to be pushed around anymore."

"Lucas, I'm so proud of you," I gushed, taking his hand in mine and squeezing it tight. "I know this is the right decision for you."

He nodded. "I think so too. And maybe you're right about what you said... Maybe, my father will see me stand up to him and a small part of him will be proud that I had the ability to stand up against him. He'll see that I'm not some weak kid."

"I think so too. He might not realize it right away, but I think he'll understand eventually. Plus, think about Victoria... she doesn't want to be forced into this marriage either."

She had said as much on our vacation to the beach house. She was just as trapped as Lucas.

"I'll be doing it for both of us then," Lucas agreed.

I squeezed his hand.

As we gazed at each other, I felt a sense of possibility wash over me— but also nervousness.

Because with Kendrick... everything made me nervous.