Chapter 153

The school days had blurred together into a frustrating, mundane rhythm.

It had already been a week since Lucas had moved back in with Kendrick. It was a week filled with distance and silence.

I hadn't seen much of Lucas since he was trying not to be seen with me at school if fear of his father finding out. It was as if he had vanished into thin air. The only time we talked anymore was over the phone, a few texts here and there.

I wanted to call him last night, but he didn't want to risk his father hearing us. It was frustrating and annoying being unable to actually communicate with him. And even though Lucas was doing all of this for me, it felt like he was slowly slipping away.

It felt like we were losing what we had just gained.

It seemed as if the whole school had taken notice in our relationship shift as well. I couldn't help but feel that everyone at school had already assumed we'd broken up, and that irritated me to no end.

They would still stare and whisper, but this time it was because they felt sorry for me.

"He must have broken up with her."

"I knew it would happen eventually, I mean, look at him and look at her. They just don't match."

"I'm surprised they even lasted this long. Good for Lucas to get out of that relationship."

I tried texting Lucas about it yesterday. One of his main points for trying to make our relationship more private was that it caused a lot of unnecessary drama.

Well now, it was causing a lot more unnecessary drama.

People were treating me as if I was something to be pitied.

Shana: Lucas, have you heard what people have been saying about me?

Lucas: Just ignore them. They have no idea what they're talking about.

It was easy for him to say, nobody was saying anything bad about him. I was the target for all of their slander.

After our text exchange, I had countless conversations in my head with Lucas, all filled with questions and anger. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but I never had the courage to voice any of it.

It was difficult, to say the least.

The thought of our relationship fading away was more than I could handle. I didn't like any of this. I wanted it to go back to how it was before. Living like this was miserable and it was starting to take a toll on me.

I wondered how Lucas was doing. There was no way that he could be enjoying this. It felt like we weren't even connected anymore.

I wanted us to be strong, to face whatever came our way together. This distance was the opposite of that.

The only person that I could talk to that would understand my current situation was James. James knew all about Lucas moving back in with his father in order to help me with my debt.

I supposed the two of them must've talked about it last week after Lucas and I had our argument.

It was a little unfair that James and Lucas were still able to see and talk to each other in person during school hours, but I guess Kendrick's only concern was me.

Why? I had no idea. But I didn't like him very much for it.

Anyway, James had known Lucas for as long as I had, if not longer. He was able to understand him in ways that no one else did.

I felt like James could give me some advice on all of this. Maybe Lucas mentioned something to him? Or maybe there was some kind of reassurance he could give me to let me stop thinking about the situation.

After lunch, I wandered the hallways looking for his tall frame. When I turned down the senior hallway, I saw him standing near his locker.

It was time for me to finally confide in him about all of my thoughts and worries.

"Hey James," I said as I creeped up next to him.

He had his back to me as he rummaged around his locker. When he heard my voice, he turned his head, a smile instantly taking over. "What's up, Shana?"

"James, what's going on with Lucas?" I asked, deciding it would be best to just get right to the point.

James sighed heavily and leaned his back against the lockers. "Hell if I know. I think he's completely lost his mind."

"Great, I think the exact same thing," I added, crossing my arms over my chest. "Has he said anything to you?"

A thoughtful expression appeared on his face. "Not much besides the fact that he hates his father's place. But he knows how I feel about it so we don't talk about it much. I think he just wants to forget about it all."

"Well, he's being really... distant with me."

"He doesn't want his dad to find out you two are still together," James reasoned. "I'm sure you know how crazy Kendrick can get."

I nodded, hating James for being right. "Yeah, I just wish Lucas would stop worrying about me so much. Kendrick can't really hurt me. He's in this whole mess because of me."

James adjusted his backpack and then turned his attention to me. "Shana, that's just how Lucas is. He's a good guy, but he's complicated. Right now, he just wants to be there for you even though he can't physically be there."

"I know, but I hate this..." I shook my head. "I hate that he's in this because of me."

"You can't stop Lucas once he sets his mind on something," James explains. "Just give him a few more days. He's trying to navigate a situation that's putting a lot of pressure on him. It's only been one week."

"But he's avoiding me, James," I said, my voice edged with desperation. "That's not normal... right?"

James sighed, seemingly deciding to choose his next words carefully. "Sometimes, when he's under a lot of stress, he tends to pull away from the people he cares about. Remember what it was like a few months ago? He was keeping secrets and hiding his emotions."

"Yeah, I guess you're right..." I understood what James was saying, but that didn't make it any easier to hear. "I just don't want us to drift apart, and it feels like that's what's going to happen to us."

James put a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Shana, the fact that you're concerned right now shows how much you mean to him. And trust me, he's just as concerned for you. Give him some space, but don't give up on him. He's got a lot on his plate right now... and so do you, considering everything with your father."

James had a point there. I needed to relax and just take this day by day. It would do me no good to go in circles and wonder what Lucas was thinking or doing.

I had to trust that everything would work out.

Before I could respond, James's phone started to ring, and I couldn't help but glance at the screen.

Victoria's name flashed in bold letters.