Chapter 45

Zara

We ate dinner in silence. I know the twins stared at me throughout the whole meal. I refused to look back up at them, though. I kept my eyes on my food.

I couldn't say what we ate. Everything tasted like dust anyway. I could only say it wasn't poison.

Had my own sister really tried to kill me?

Sure, Chloe admitted to framing me. And she handed me over to the Rogues.

But she didn't think the Alphas would kill me, only punish me. And Adrian was with the Rogues. She'd been bonded to him, she wouldn't think of him as a killer. She might even have thought she was helping him by betraying me.

It didn't make sense. I knew she hated me. She always had. I never really understood why, when she had everything and the whole pack adored her. I just didn't think she hated me enough to do what Kieran and Lucian claimed.

Only, why would they lie? Were they trying to manipulate me? Kieran liked mind games, so I might believe he'd come up with something like that. But would Lucian? He was always so blunt and forthright.

“Hey, Zara,” Kieran spoke up after we'd all finished eating.

“Yes?” I asked, bracing for the worst.

Even if they thought they were protecting me, they still locked me up. And if they were convinced I was in danger, they'd put me right back in that tower.

“I know you're mad at us, and maybe you have a right to be,” he said, like he wasn't sure why I was mad but he didn't want me to start yelling, “but you did promise to help us. And it is the full moon. It's getting dark soon.”

I looked over at the window, and saw that yes, the sky was beginning to turn red at the horizon. The moon wasn't up yet but I could feel it tugging at the edges of my mind.

“You want me to soothe you,” I said.

“Our wolves, yes,” Lucian said. “We do have a bargain, do we not?”

I winced. I was the one who insisted on renegotiating. I was the one who made it a contract. I couldn't back out now.

“Yes,” I said, wrapping my arms around my chest. Could I soothe their wolves when I was so unsettled myself?

Lucian tilted his head. His eyes flashed from their normal blue to wolf gold for an instant. I stared back at him. Could I help him?

“Run with us,” he said.

“Huh?” I looked over at Kieran, hoping he'd make more sense.

“Yeah!” Kieran bounced to his feet. “Run with us, Zara. It's the full moon. You shouldn't be cooped up inside.”

“But... I can't shift,” I reminded them.

“So we run on two feet not four,” Lucian said with a shrug. His eyes flickered again. “It'll still be good. Good for you, too.”

Did I want to run with them? Did I dare? I looked out the window and saw the slightest hint of the full moon rising, silver gilding the branches of the trees.

I never ran with the pack. On the full moon I always stayed in my room, alone, and fought to ignore the howling in my veins.

Kieran stood at the door and held his hand out to me. No one had ever done that. Even Adrian left me behind.

I took a deep breath, and took his hand.

“Okay,” I said. “Let’s run.”

Running under the full moon was like nothing I’d ever experienced. Training with the guards, running as hard and as fast as I could, was tedious. I had been slogging through the mud my whole life and never realized. This was like flying.

Lucian ran ahead, choosing our path and clearing the way. Kieran followed close on my heels, nudging and bumping me with a laugh then darting aside before I could retaliate. It should’ve been annoying but I heard my laugh echo through the trees. I chased him and tumbled, somehow regaining his feet with a laugh of his own.

Time meant nothing. The moon glittered overhead and gilded the air around me silver. I breathed it in and howled in concert with wolves I couldn’t see.

The three of us tumbled together into a clearing. Lucian turned on one foot and stretched his arms wide. I ran into his embrace and we rolled across the soft moss and leaves.

I breathed in Lucian’s scent, warm and spicy like cinnamon and the air after a storm. His chest rumbled with a silent laugh and I looked up to see his eyes were shining gold.

Kieran scrambled after us and buried his face in my belly. He whined and nuzzled my skin. I put a finger under his chin and turned his face up to see his eyes were a soft amber.

Both of them were lost in the grip of their wolves. Even though they hadn’t shifted and held their human skin, these were werewolves out on the full moon. I should have been afraid, but I couldn’t find a hint of nerves in my body. All I felt was desire.

I wanted them. My wolf wanted them. And these wolves, my mates, wanted me. I groaned and melted in their embrace.

Lucian hadn’t remembered the kiss in the shower. He still didn’t know I was their fated mate. If he didn’t remember that, would they remember this? Could I risk it?

Lucian twisted and rolled and suddenly I was staring up into his eyes. His body pressed me down to the ground and his arms caged me on either side of my face and I should have been half panicked. Instead, I leaned up and caught his mouth in a deep kiss.

Kieran whined and tucked himself against my side. I twisted so that I could kiss him, too.

I could do this. I was doing this. I wrapped my arms around their necks and pulled them close. Their wolves knew what they needed and my wolf knew what to do.

Their hands wandered over my body. I couldn’t tell whose was where and frankly I didn’t care so long as they didn’t stop. I ran one hand through Lucian’s hair. Kieran licked and nipped at the junction of my neck and shoulder. Warmth tingled down my spine.

I moaned as Lucian bent to kiss and lick the other shoulder. Why did that feel so damn good?

Warmth pooled in my belly. I writhed under their hands, wanting, needing more.

I caught Kieran’s mouth in a deep kiss. Hands stroked along my sides, fingers danced down my spine.

The warmth in my gut became heat. I groaned, and then gasped at a sudden, stabbing pain.

Lucian paused his movements. Kieran whined softly.

“I’m…” I tried to tell them I was fine, as the heat became a fire. The words caught in my throat.

Why was this happening? Was it the bond? But neither of them claimed me!

I whimpered as the pain spread from my gut to my bones. My joints burned and ached. I felt cold and nauseous, and my hands shook.

Something was wrong. The same thing happened in the shower, with Lucian. But this was worse. The pain spread throughout my body. I gasped and fought for breath. My vision grayed out and I curled into a ball. It hurt. Everything hurt.

“Zara!”

I heard someone shout my name. I tried to respond, but the only sound that came from my mouth was a strained whimper.

I reached out, or tried to, but my arms were too weak to lift my hands. I gasped, and my vision went white. Then black.