Chapter 43

Zara

Lucian grabbed my arm and led me through the woods. It was like he thought I would try to run away if he wasn’t holding on to me. I wouldn’t. Mostly because I didn’t want to end up captured by the Rogues.

“You were going to bond to him?” Lucian asked. “Seriously?”

I shrugged. “What choice did I have? He was my fated match.”

“He chose to reject you, though,” Lucian said. “You don’t have to accept your wolf’s choice, you know.”

I shook my head. “It’s different for hybrids.”

“Huh.” Lucian paused, holding up a hand for me to wait.

He tilted his head like he was listening for something, before tugging me in another direction. I assumed he knew what he was doing and followed. He obviously knew a lot more than I did about moving through enemy territory.

“Would you have rejected him, if you were a full wolf?” Lucian asked after a few minutes of walking.

I wasn’t sure. Now, looking back I could tell that Adrian was a condescending, controlling jerk. Back then, though? When he was the only man who’d ever looked at me twice? How much would I have put up with, just to have someone choose me?

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “He seemed different then.”

“Hm,” Lucian hummed and made another seemingly random change in our direction. “What’s it like?”

“What?” I asked.

“Meeting your fated mate. Being with him. What’s that like?” He paused. “I haven’t met mine yet. I’m just curious if it’s worth all this trouble.”

“I'm not the best person to ask,” I pointed out. “My fated mate rejected me.”

“Yeah, but you're the only person around to ask,” Lucian said. “Besides, you got engaged, so you were with him for a little while. What was that part like?”

I shrugged. I didn't like talking about Adrian. But Lucian had just held the jerk so I could kick him in the balls. I supposed that earned him a few answers.

“It was nice, at first,” I admitted. “Adrian was the only one to really notice me. When he told me he sensed we were fated, it was the best day of my life.”

“Really,” Lucian drawled. “Wait. He told you?”

“I didn't feel it at first. He noticed the signs. Then he kissed me, and he was sure,” I said.

“You didn't feel it?” Lucian asked.

“Not really,” I admitted. “I felt the bond later. I think it's because my wolf is so weak.”

“Huh. And he couldn't have been faking it? And then you convinced yourself you felt something?” Lucian asked.

I glared at him, but before I could tell him exactly why he was an idiot for suggesting I was too stupid to recognize a fated bond, he held up a hand for silence and pressed me up against the nearest tree.

I heard several people rush by, but all I could see was the intense blue of Lucian's eyes. I stared up at him and held my breath. Would the Rogues see us? We were exposed, in the open with only a few leaves and branches between us and them.

Somehow, though, they ran right past. Not one of the group noticed we were there.

Lucian must have noticed my confusion and shock, because he leaned close to whisper.

“We track movement. A still body in the woods is almost impossible to spot. You can walk right next to one. Close enough to reach out and grab, and you just don't notice.”

“They didn't smell us?” I whispered, keeping my voice as quiet as I possibly could.

“They were moving too fast, relying on hearing and sight. They don't know who they're looking for, or they don't have our scents.”

I nodded. “That's good, right?”

“Yes, but we should move. They won't all be incompetent,” Lucian warned.

“Right,” I whispered back.

Lucian didn't move right away. He rested his forehead against the tree, and I felt his breath on my shoulder. I put my hands on his chest, suddenly uncomfortably aware that I was alone in the woods pressed tightly against a tree by a very naked man.

Nudity was just part of life as a werewolf. You shifted to wolf, your clothing fell off. When you shifted back, you were naked. If you didn't have a stash of clothes nearby, you stayed naked until you found something to wear. Everyone got used to seeing naked people dashing across the yard and through the trees.

This felt different, somehow. I couldn't ignore all that smooth, tan skin. The muscles shifting against my body sent tingles straight to my core. The intensity of his stare stole my breath. I pushed at his shoulders and tried to ignore how warm and firm those shoulders were. I needed him to move because I didn't want him to move away.

Lucian breathed deeply, as if trying to memorize my scent. He nuzzled his cheek against my hair and pulled me tightly against him, away from the tree.

“Lucian,” I said, voice low, “we have to move.”

Lucian whined, voice strained, but he took a single step back, and then another one. He turned his head away and breathed deeply several times. I could practically hear him fighting for control over his wolf.

I wished I dared offer to help, but there was no way I could soothe his wolf in the middle of Rogue territory. Forget the dangers of him learning I was his fated mate. The Rogues would find us and kill us both before it mattered.

“Right,” Lucian said. “This way.”

He led me some distance before saying, “You were talking about him. Your mate.”

“We were never true mates,” I pointed out. “But yeah. For a while, it was great. I was always the outsider, always alone. With Adrian, I finally felt like I mattered. Like someone saw me.” I shrugged. “I don't miss him much, not really, but I do miss feeling like I belonged.”

Lucian hummed softly to himself for a moment. “I suppose that sounds nice enough.” He paused. “But when Adrian rejected you, why didn't you return the favor and sever the bond?”

I snarled and turned away. Did he have to rub it in all the time? Yes, I was part human. Yes, I was shift-less if not wolf-less. I knew all that.

“Zara?” Lucian asked. “What's wrong?”

“I get it, okay?” I snapped. “I'm not good enough. I can't even form a proper bond. I'm just a useless hybrid. I get it!”

“Lower your voice,” Lucian hissed. “Or do you want to get caught by the Rogues?”

“I'm not a traitor!” I hissed back.

“No, you just want nothing more than to abandon your pack and your Alphas,” Lucian replied.

“I want to leave the pack because I do not belong! I'm not like you. I can't live my whole life killing and fighting. I want a chance to learn who and what I really am. Why won't you just let me go?”

“We can't. We need you,” Lucian growled.

I opened my mouth to reply, but a rustle in the underbrush stopped me. I froze, and Lucian stepped in front of me. We waited tensely for a Rogue attack or for an alarm to be raised.

Instead, Kieran skidded to a stop.

“We can argue later, you two,” he said. “We need to go.”

“The wolves who were with you?” Lucian asked.

“I sent them ahead, came back for you. Come on, already!”

I ran after the Alpha twins, and silently vowed that I would finish my argument with Lucian. Just as soon as we were all safe.