Chapter 111

Emily

As the days go on, my body feels less like my own and more like it belongs to the baby in my belly. My symptoms have gotten worse and my ankles have never been so swollen in my life. With every day, it feels like I am becoming less like myself and more like an incubator that works for someone else.

In the middle of the night, I find myself craving different foods and combinations, such as pickles and chocolate with hot sauce on the side. Other days, I simply do not want to eat at all and I throw up at every other hour whenever the smell of nearby food or something rotten is in my near vicinity.

Even my clothes have gotten tighter. My baggy pants, no longer sag on me nor do my loose fitted T-shirts feel oversized anymore. My body has balloon over the course of a few months and it has left me feeling scared.

I am scared because I do not know how Logan is going to react to the news of my pregnancy. Earlier in our relationship, he made it very clear that he has no intention of becoming a father and having kids of his own. He thinks that they take up too much time and energy and don't give anything back in return.

I do think it is quite funny, though, that Logan has not picked up on the changes of my body yet. We share a bed every night and he is none the wiser, making a comment about how I have grown more comfortable in our relationship together instead of the fact that I am now the mother of his unborn child.

I watch my husband from the comfort of my desk while he works in his office. He doesn't pay attention to me, but instead gives his attention to the work in front of him. It is admirable to know that Logan gives so much to his pack. I just hope that he can give the same attention and love to our child…after I tell him about them, of course.

Carla surprises me when she quickly enters in the office. She holds trays of food in her hands, white bags sitting on top of them. My eyes widen at the site and I immediately feel my stomach turning on itself, ready to throw up the small amount of breakfast that I had that morning.

“Everyone! Come on over! I got us lunch today!” Carla announces to Logan's office.

The smell of raw fish fills the air. It is salty and putrid, making my stomach want to hurl right here in this moment. I can feel my skin go clammy in my mouth filled with saliva, towel sign of what is to come.

I abruptly stand for my desk, my chair knocking into a nearby lamp. The people in the office trying to look at me, even Logan stares at me as he exits his office. He raises an eye eyebrow me, and I forced a smile across my face, unsure how much longer I can keep up the façade that I am okay and don't need to run away to the bathroom.

The smell of the raw fish makes me feel so nauseous. I can feel myself becoming dizzy by the second, pushing myself away from my desk and towards the office doors. I can hear logan's footsteps after me and I ate turn around after I step outside, waving my hand at him.

“I'm okay! There is no need to worry about me! I just need to go do something right now, that's all,” I force a cherry smile onto my face, hoping that Logan believes my surface level lie and doesn't pry into it further.

His eyes look me up and down, making my body feel like it is on fire. I swallowed the lump in my throat, swallowing the vomit that threatens to push up. My feet are so swollen and sore in this moment I wish I could just sit down and hold something cold to them. Logan doesn't move though, slightly narrowing, his eyes at me.

“What's wrong, emily?” he asks, taking a step towards me. I take a step back, crossing my arms over my stomach, as if it can help the nausea that I feel in this moment. “You're acting weird right now. Are you hiding something for me? What is it?”

I shake my head and swallow the lump in my throat. More more saliva gathers in my mouth, and I am unsure if I will be able to hold back the wave of vomit and throw up that is about to hit me if I remain near the smell of sushi and raw fish.

“Yes! Everything is okay! I just got an email from Terry from my pack, and he says that something is urgent to end that I need to go handle it since, you know, I am the Alpha and all…” my voice awkwardly trails off, my excuse, strong yet delivery falling flat. I clear my throat in the hopes that it will help alleviate some of the tension in my stomach and body.

Logan places his hands on his hips and shakes his head, sighing. I suck in a breath and grab a fistful of my loose dress, hoping that he doesn't press further into the matter. I do not know if I will be able to lie anymore to him without throwing up in front of him.

“Okay,” he slowly nods his head, “call me if you need anything though, okay?”

I begin to walk backwards towards the elevator, and on my head, giving him a thumbs up before, turning around, rushing away as fast as I can. I seek refuge in the elevator and can feel my body relaxed as soon as the doors close, the raw fish scent finally leaving me alone.

I saw a breath of relief and lean against the wall, my purse slung over my shoulder. I close my eyes and try to study my uneasy body, wishing that Carla had brought a deep-fried meal instead of sushi. I swear, she is always trying to find a way to bring me down after Iris was fired.

The elevator doors open and I step out, my heels quickly clicking against the tile flooring. I look around as if I am on the run from somebody, try not to be stopped again just so I can get out of this shitty situation and go back home where I can lay in bed and relax for the rest of the day.

I push through the doors and step out into the warm sun. I exhale, ready to hail a taxi, before somebody bumped into me. I lose my balance, ready to fall to the ground, but the person quickly grabs my hands and studies me, their eyes meeting mine.

“I am so sorry about that! I didn't know where I was going!” the woman claims, slowly letting me go once she realizes that I am okay. “You don't look too good yourself, though, do you need me to help you with anything?”

“No, no, I'll be okay,” I know my head, not wanting to engage in the conversation anymore.

“That’s good then,” the woman nods, “well, I was wondering if you knew where I could find a woman named Emily?”

I narrow my eyes at her. I take a step back and placed my hands on my hips, staring at her with a million questions running through my mind.

“I’m Emily,” I slowly speak, “who are you?”

“Oh! I'm Delilah,” she smiles brightly, “I am Logan's ex!”