Chapter 108

Emily

Today, I have a meeting with my family’s pack. Admittedly, I have been trying my best to avoid a situation like this. To come face to face with the members of my pack that are sure to hate me because of my father’s influence.

Nausea settles itself in my stomach. It twists and turns, leaving me an unsettled mess before I have to step through the doors of the pack’s office. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, trying my best to calm my nerves, before opening my eyes once again, pushing through the doors of the werewolf office.

Thankfully, I have Logan with me at my side. He offered to come with me as emotional support, somebody who will be there in my corner in case things turn south. Of course, I allowed him to come with me, unable to bear the weight of this new responsibility on my own. After all, he did offer to help me in becoming a great alpha, so I suppose that this meeting is one of the steppingstones I have to take in order to gain their trust.

We hold hands and walk through the office. I look around, curiosity enveloping my body as we make our way to the private elevator in the back. Logan presses the button and turns down to look at me, offering me a small smile as the elevator doors open.

We move in silence, neither of us daring to talk to the other. We both taking our surroundings as people stare at us with widened eyes, unsure as to why we are here or who we are. At least they know who Logan is, bowing their heads and respect as they pass.

Me, on the other hand? I am simply a nobody who shouldn't even be here in the first place. I have a feeling that they will try to bully me into giving up my role as the Alpha. I simply cannot let that happen.

We stepped through the boardroom stores. There is a large table in the center of the room, and it is surrounded by various people. People who I assume to be the ones who were running my pack in my absence after my father was forced to give up control.

Their eyes attach to Logan and I. I keep my chin tilted up, not wanting them to get me or to show that I am nervous, and take my place at the head of the table. The place where the Alpha belongs. Once I sit down, Logan follows, and I turn my attention to the room.

It is silent. It is unsettling, making me more nervous than it needs to be. I suck in a deep breath before exhaling, standing once again to introduce myself to my pack.

“Hello,” I greet, my voice strong, “my name is Emily and I am your Alpha. Now, I know that you were expecting my father to remain in control, but due to unforeseen circumstances, I am here now. My mother wanted me to run the pack after her death, but it was taken from me. I plan on bringing our pack back into the spotlight and to push us further than we have before, to thrive in this new environment.”

Once I am done speaking, I look towards logan. He gives me a gentle nod before turning his attention back to the room. I follow his gaze and look at the people who sit at the table. They look unimpressed, bored, even.

Then, there is a laugh. A chuckle that makes me feel shaken into my core. Others follow suit, their laughter filling the boardroom as they look amongst each other, rolling their eyes and pointing at me as if I am simply not there. It makes me feel so small, so insecure, as if I never should've come here in the first place.

“How is a hibernated wolf going to get us out of the spot your father put us in?” one of the men at the table asks.

“Where's your father? Where is Philip? He knows what to do,” another person makes a comment. I try to ignore it, I really do.

“Exactly,” another begins, “we need our real alpha here. Not some fake wolf who thinks she knows what she is talking about.”

I suck in a breath. I can feel my eyes sting, tears ready to follow any moment. I truly try to remain in the room for as long as I can, but I quickly escape from the place, rushing through the boardroom doors, feeling so sick to my stomach.

“Emily!” Logan’s voice calls out from behind. I ignore him, though, unable to bring myself to look at the man after I was just ruthlessly humiliated in front of my supposed peers.

I pushed through the boundaries of the woman's bathroom, seeking solace in a stall down the walkway. I trapped myself inside, hands resting over my stomach. I look at a silver trashcan that hangs on the wall, my reflection, staring back at me as tears run down my face at a rapid pace, my makeup now ruined, streaked and messy.

I never should've come here. I never should have taken the chance and pretended to be like something. I am not. Clearly, I am not meant for an alpha roll. If my hibernated wolf did not tell me this before, I clearly know it now.

I dropped to my knees, pulling my hair out of my face as I throw up into the toilet bowl. I allow myself to be vulnerable in this moment, not wanting to hold back as more and more strings of vomit and bile leave my mouth. Once I am done, I stand up and wipe my mouth, exiting the bathroom stall and making my way towards the sink.

I stare at myself in the mirror. My eyes are a bright, red color, irritated from the tears. My makeup is completely ruined and my hair is a frizzy mess.

How can I come to this? How could I allow myself to be put into a situation where people wish to see me fail, where people do not wish to see their rightful leader come into power?

I glanced to the side, noticing a small wooden wool basket on the sinks countertop. It holds pads and tampons, sanitary items for a woman on her period. I swallowed a lump in my throat, my mind trying to remember the last time I needed one.

My body goes cold, rigid, stiff, unable to move. I slowly shake my head back-and-forth, rushing towards the pads. I pick one up and inspect it, more and more tears ready to leave my eyes.

I think it has been a month since my last one. I didn't even notice, time has just been flying me while Logan taught me the intricacies of being an Alpha.

Surely, this just means that my cycle has become irregular. This is not some sort of sign from the universe that there's something else going on, especially one that logan and I have agreed not to pursue due to my dormant wolf.

The thought does cross my mind, though. The idea of me being pregnant is outlandish, ridiculous, even. I have to keep this to myself. Logan cannot know.