Chapter 29

Shirley

“Shirley? Shirley? Is everything okay?”

I blink as I finally acknowledge Alana calling out to me, my vision clearing as I register her concerned features.

“Are you alright?” she tries again.

Am I alright!? I just discovered that the job I was practically lusting after is located in the town I just saved my best friend from. A job that is led by a man I’d swore I’d never see again and was trying to distract myself from. I don’t even know what I am.

“Y- yes,” I manage to say despite the sourness swirling around in my stomach. I know my words are not the least bit convincing as I watch Alana eye me, most likely noticing the lack of color in my cheeks.

“Is there something wrong with the job?” she asks, lifting a brow.

“No, no,” I toss out quickly. “Of course not.”

But it’s a lie. Everything is wrong with this job. Well, besides the amazing payout and provisions - but somehow that almost makes matters worse.

“Well, good…” Alana trails out, still looking skeptical. “So you’re still interested?”

Taking in her question, I open my mouth to reply, but practically choke on air as I hesitate. Nothing comes out as if my throat is withholding words, my mind filled with a parade of concerns.

If I accept this job then that means I’ll have to go back to the Lockheart pack and face Keith within the week. It’s a risk. No, it’s impossible. I feel helpless as I try to come up with something, eventually stammering out a response.

“I- I don’t know,” I confess, feeling my body exhausted with unease and tension.

“You don’t know?” Alana asks, her brows furrowing. “But you were practically drooling all over this job five minutes ago.”

“I know,” I say weakly. “But…” I pause, trying to come up with a swift excuse. “But I think you're right. I just got back and might need a second to get my bearings. I need to think about it.”

Alana doesn’t seem to be happy with my answer as she releases a sigh, but still she accepts my words. “Okay,” she says flatly. “That’s fine.”

“Really, Alana,” I try. “I’m really grateful for the opportunity. It’s just that -”

The project is being led by a man who will probably burn me to cinders on sight.

“It’s fine,” Alana says again, that time her tone is a bit lighter. I feel a sliver of relief as it reaches my ears, but I find my reaction is premature as she eventually continues.

“But I need an answer by the end of the day,” she states.

“The end of the day!?” I ask, unable to stop myself from blurting the question.

“Yes,” she replies with a nod. “Like I said, this is a major client and they need someone immediately. I’ve held onto it as long as I can, but they need a response. Plus - now that everyone knows your back - they’ll be putting pressure on me.”

I gape at her, finding words unreachable again as I remain stunned.

“Think it over, figure it out,” she insists as she closes the file. “And let me know what you decide before you leave for the day.”

“Alright…” I finally offer, trying to not look down to my shoes. Instead, I decide to excuse myself as I shuffle out of the room. Needing distance and privacy, I immediately go to my respected office, close myself inside. From there, I can’t help but pace, my hands taking turns running through my hair.

This is insane. Absolutely insane. The universe has to be playing some sort of joke on me because I can’t believe this is happening.

A huge job - maybe the biggest one I’ve ever encountered - and it’s tied back to Keith. It’s simply cruel.

There’s no way I can take it - not after everything that has happened. Honestly, Keith would kill me the second he sees me, or maybe just lock me up so he can interrogate Anya…or whoever the fuck he thinks I am! He might even find it necessary to torture me for answers. I’d be a fool to go.

But I’m also a fool if I don’t take it. It could be a crucial step in my career and if I decline then it might put me on shaky ground with Alana. She might believe I’m not as serious as she originally thought, which is completely false.

Goddess, this is too much. I can barely comprehend any of this on my own and need someone to talk some reason into me.

So that’s just what I do. Before I know it, I’m practically running to my desk, grabbing my work phone before I type in a number. Instantly, I bring the phone to my ear, hearing it ring once before someone answers.

“Oh, hey-“

“Jean,” I interrupt.

“Shirley?” she asks curiously.

“Yes, sorry. I’m calling from my work phone,” I explain.

“Oh, no worries,” she replies, bouncing back. “What’s up?”

“I need your help,” I admit, deciding not to beat around the bush. “My boss pulled me into her office and told me about this amazing opportunity to help take a pack’s new company public. They’re offering a massive paycheck, housing, everything.”

“Wow,” Jean breathes. “That is amazing. I think you should take it. I mean, if you’re worried about leaving Eliot and me on such short notice then don’t. We’ll be fine.”

“No,” I huff out. “It’s not that.”

“Then what’s wrong?” she asks.

Again, I have to sigh as I try and prepare myself for what I’m about to say. But finally, it all comes flooding out.

“It’s just not any pack. It’s Keith’s pack…your old pack. I'd have to go back to Lockheart. They must have reached out to some of the best agencies in the country and found mine or something. But regardless, my boss wants me to take the job.”

As I say the words, my eyes close tightly as I imagine Jean allowing each and every one to hit her. And apparently they hit her hard as she doesn’t say anything, only her breath brushes through the phone and the rest is silence.

“Jean?” I ask, opening my eyes. “Jean…say something. Please.”

“Shirley…” she begins. “You can’t.”

“I know, I know. I can’t, can I?” I ask, still feeling torn inside. “But it’s such a big opportunity. But there’s no way I can go back there. I just…I wish there was a way to make this all meet in the middle. To take the job, but also save myself from Keith, Ralph, the whole pack. If only I could just turn myself into an entirely different person so they wouldn’t -“

I freeze then, coming to an abrupt stop as my eyes absentmindedly stare at the wall.

That’s it.

“Shirley,” Jean says again, seeming to realize why I’ve stopped talking. “No. No, definitely not.”

“But it could work,” I breathe.

It could. It really could. And Cicy knows it too as I can sense her wagging her tail in approval.

“I could use Cicy’s gift. I could change my scent, disguise myself as a new person,” I explain swiftly.

“No,” Jean repeats. “It’s too dangerous.”

“Only if I get caught,” I respond, and I’m convincing myself that I won’t. “Think about it, Jean. You know how good I am at altering my appearance. I wouldn’t have to do much.”

In fact, I’d barely have to do anything at all. I’m reminded again of the conversation I had with Keith in the club - how he’d discovered my badge and I’d told him it was my sister’s. All I’d have to do is dress a little older, draw on a mole, change my scent. I wouldn’t have to do much more - I could even use my own name!

“You’d have a lot of explaining to do,” Jean warns me. “When Keith meets you…when Ralph sees you. They’re going to have a lot of questions.”

“Yeah, I know,” I reply. “But I can handle it.”

Yes, I can. I can pull this off. I can have the job and keep Keith from tearing my head off. It’s a gamble, but one I might be willing to make.

“Shirley,” Jean warns.

“I have to go,” I tell her immediately.

“Shirley, no-“

But I’m already hanging up the phone, my skin prickling as I look at the door. And then I’m moving toward it, walking out of my office with my head held high and determination in my steps. I don’t falter, not until I reach Alana’s office and stop right in front of her desk.

“I’ll take the job.”