Chapter 212

Cara’s POV

When we arrived back at my house, I knew it was only a matter of time before Alaric started talking me out of my desire to stay in the competition. His protective instincts were fierce, even though he clearly had been trying to fight them lately. I knew he wouldn’t be able to hold back at least suggesting my quitting, to keep me safe.

We made it all the way to the kitchen, where I poured us each a glass of wine before he finally cracked.

“I want to respect you and support you,” he said, and sounded like he was building up to something.

“Then don’t ask me to quit,” I said.

He closed his mouth a moment, and his jaw clenched. His eyes were tight, and he gripped the edge of the kitchen island so tightly I thought he might snap off the corner of it.

Maybe repressing his instincts wasn’t the best choice, not for his health.

“Ask me, then,” I said. “But be okay when I say no.”

He exhaled with relief. “Cara, please drop out of the competition.”

“No,” I said.

“Why?” he replied. “With Lilia being there, you are in danger. And in your condition…”

I looked at him sharply. I hated when people suggested that my current state somehow made me less capable. Yes, physically, I was starting to weaken, but I was also fighting hard to work against it. This illness might take me, but I was going to claw tooth and nail at the dirt to keep it from happening too soon.

“I only mean…” he sighed. “I can’t be there to protect you during the competition, not like I want to be. Lilia purposefully picked this event to catch you when you are vulnerable. After everything she’s done to us… I hate the thought of her catching you off-guard and all alone.”

The anger that had sparked during Lilia’s reappearance in my life and had simmered just beneath the surface of my skin now started to burn hotter, igniting into a wildfire.

Setting the wine aside, I faced him fully. “Everyone keeps saying to watch my back. To be careful she doesn’t catch me alone. They, and you, are forgetting that this woman has made my life hell for far too long. They are somehow reasoning that it will be possible for her to catch me off guard.”

My rage made me strong and determined. Curling my own hands into fists, I told him. “They don’t realize that yes, I might be alone with her, but just as much, she will be alone with me. After all she’s done to me, to my children, to you… She is the one who should be watching her back.”

Alaric blinked. Looking at me, it was as if all the worry inside of him vanished for one stunned moment.

“Cara…” he said, somewhat breathlessly. But then, too soon, the worry returned, and he shook his head. “Even so, it’s not worth the risk. Anything could happen. There are too many variables.”

“I can handle myself.”

“You can,” Alaric said, “But I would prefer if you didn’t have to put your life on the line to do it.”

I shook my head and started to turn away.

Yet, before I could, Alaric closed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. As he tugged me closer, my cheek came to rest on his chest. Almost out of instinct, I lifted my arms and snaked them around his waist.

I’d missed closeness like this. As angry and annoyed as I was, I wasn’t going to let go of this moment, this opportunity now that I had it.

I soaked in his warmth, his comfort.

“I’m just scared for you,” he said, and in a way, I could understand it. After all, there had been plenty of times when we’d been in danger and I had been scared for him too. He placed too much weight in his Alpha abilities. Sometimes he seemed to forget that he too just a mortal.

That was the gift I’d been given in all this. I knew now more than I ever had before about the limits to mortality. But instead of using it to hold me back, I was using it to make me stronger, more determined.

Alaric thought I was reckless by staying the competition, but in truth I was the opposite. This was how I maintained control. And with that control was how I was going to survive.

If Lilia or the illness wanted to take my life from me, they were going to have to claw it out of my hands.

I wouldn’t give up. I’d never give up.

“Cara…”

I froze. That voice.

It hadn’t been outside of me, but in my very own head. It had almost sounded like… But could it be…?”

“Cara..!” the voice said again, more forcefully.

“Did you hear that?” I asked Alaric.

“Hear what?” he asked me.

“My wolf,” I said, with tears rising in my eyes.

Alaric gasped and moved like he was going to pull away from me. I hugged him tighter.

“No! Keep holding me. I think it’s working!”

Inside of me, I could sense the presence of my wolf, so much closer than she had been in the past.

She was right there.

I could almost reach her.

“Stay,” I said in my mind. “Please!”

Even out loud, I begged. “Don’t leave!”

She’d been so close, but I already felt her slipping away, like she was backsliding down a hill. I rushed after her in my mind, trying to reach her, trying to stop her.

But she was falling away faster than I could catch her.

So soon, too soon, she was gone again.

The tears welling in my eyes dripped down and I started to sob.

She’d been so close. After all this time, I had felt her more than I ever had before.

I cried in earnest, mourning her loss all over again. Alaric silently held me through it, not saying a word. He kissed the top of my head, he nuzzled my hair.

I soaked in his closeness, his warmth, and his scent.

Eventually, after I cried as much as I was able, I started to pull back to look up at him. I felt absolutely miserably.

“She was right there…” I said, my voice rough from crying.

“And she will be again,” Alaric said.

I didn’t know how he could be so optimistic in this moment when I felt so very defeated.

“Our closeness, Cara. It’s working,” he said.

I blinked and let his words sink into my mind.

Gods… could he be right? If we continued to spend time together, would my wolf eventually follow his scent right back to me?

“Stay beside me like glue,” I told him, leaving no room for argument.

He didn’t seem like he was going to argue anyway.

“You have my word,” he said. “I’ll stay right here until you don’t need me anymore.”

The words made something twist in my stomach. I had a suspicious feeling that, even after my wolf returned to me, I would still need him by my side.

But first thing’s first. I wanted to bring my wolf home.