Chapter 183
Fiona
“Keep yourself safe.”
Lurching up, I whip my head to Ethan. He still lays there, unmoving and pale, but I could’ve sworn he spoke to me.
“Ethan?”
He doesn’t move, and I scramble out of bed, nearly falling as I rush to his side.
“Ethan?!” My voice cracks as I lay a hand on his chest. “Please, please, please,” I mutter, waiting for his chest to rise. It staggers, moving slowly, but it does move.
“Is everything okay?” Healer Asha asks, rushing to my side. She looks between me and Ethan worriedly.
“I… I thought he….” I can’t finish the words because my stomach churns and nausea slams into me. I slap my hand over my mouth and run for the bathroom. I barely get to the toilet when my entire body revolts against me, sending my dinner from last night back up.
My body heaves, trying to force the nausea away, but it only makes me feel unsteady. Luckily, Healer Asha catches me when I slump to the floor.
“Let’s get you back to bed,” she murmurs, helping me to the bed.
“Can I sit by him? In the chair,” I clarify, and even though she hesitates, she moves me to the chair. I wait for a moment as she pushes the chair closer to Ethan’s bed, and then I curl up on the uncomfortable furniture, lacing my fingers through his.
The touch soothes something in me, like a calming balm spreading over my nerves. If he were awake, I know he’d squeeze my hand, probably brush his thumb over my knuckles. He would ask me if I was okay or if he could get me some medicine.
Like he did while I was sick at his house.
The lump in my throat expands as my eyes sting.
“Why didn’t I open the door?” I whimper, lifting his hand and tucking our hands under my chin. “I-I should’ve opened the door… should’ve listened. You were just t-trying to protect me. I know that now.”
When he doesn’t respond, my heart cracks.
“P-please just say something. Anything. Yell at me. Tell me I was wrong. J-just,” my voice cracks as a sob forces its way out of me. “Just say something. Please!”
Silence.
Deafening and cold silence wraps around me as I break down into tears.
Strong yet gentle arms wrap around me, holding me as I cry. She whispers, telling me it’s going to be okay, that I shouldn’t blame myself, but I can’t stop. The tears fall as if they’ll never end, like a stream coming from an ocean.
A never-ending stream of guilt that falls, and falls, and falls until my eyes are swollen and there are no more tears to cry.
“I-it hurts.”
“I know, honey, but if you don’t calm down, you’re going to make yourself sick.”
I push the heels of my palms into my eyes before looking up at Healer Asha. She offers a broken smile and a mug of steaming tea.
“I know it won’t help much, but it’ll make you feel less nauseous,” she says softly, setting the mug in my hands. “Moon Moss is very good for getting rid of morning sickness.”
It takes a second for my brain to process her words, and once I do, I almost drop the cup. Did she just… She smiles, and I know she did. She knows, which means all three of them probably know. Then the image of the lady selling Moon Moss at the market flitters into my brain.
She knew too. That smug looks she gave me was because she knew I was pregnant.
“Drink up. You need your energy if we’re going to find that antidote.”
“I-I think I found it!” I jump up, my eyes scanning the list of plants and herbs again.
Nightshade
Wolfsbane
Elmrise
Basilik Venom
Blackvaine root
They’re the five ingredients that were mixed together to make the toxin in Ethan’s body. We’d gotten the lab report back this morning and immediately started searching for the list of elements.
“Let me see,” Healer Farah says, and I pass the old book to her. I watch as all three of them hover over the page and as they smile. Though, it doesn’t last long. One by one, their smiles drop.
“What is it? Am I wrong?” I was sure this was it. If they say I’m wrong, I don’t know what I’ll do. We’ll have to continue this seemingly endless search.
“You’re not wrong, Fiona,” Healer Sarina says, but she doesn’t smile again. “There’s a problem with the toxin, or really with the antidote.”
She hesitates to continue, and I throw my arms in the air.
“We don’t have time to hesitate. Just tell me what the problem is.”
“There is a very rare flower that we would need to find in order to make the antidote for this exact mixture of toxins,” she says then glances at the other two healers. “We could contact the council healers and see if they have one, but…”
Healer Asha shakes her head, “But it’s not a guarantee. They’ve nearly been hunted to extinction. I doubt even the council’s healers have access to the flower.”
“What flower?!” I bark, not wanting to be left out. I hate that they’re talking like I’m not in the room. They’ve kept me in the loop all this time just to shut me out at the most crucial moment.
“Mixing Wolfsbane and Basilik Venom is a deadly combination that can only be fought with the rarest flower on our continent. Years ago, when several of the royal family were poisoned, the healers in the Kingdom Center nearly used every trace of the plant. I’m not sure if there are even any left,” Healer Sarina explains, touching my arm.
I jerk back. I can’t stand when people look at me with those pitiful eyes.
“But that was years ago. Plants can grow back if there are still some remaining. We can’t give up when we’re this close,” I beg, unwilling to accept that Ethan will die because of this rare poison. I can’t- won’t- let that happen. “Where did these flowers grow?”
“They used to be in the forests, among the trees where they could get plenty of moonlight,” Healer Farah answers. “We can contact the Kingdom’s best healers and ask if they have any samples. There has to be a trace somewhere.”
“Even so, it won’t be easy to make the antidote. I’ve never seen or heard of such a deadly mixture. What if the usual antidotes don’t work?” Healer Asha asks, looking at her friends.
“Then we’ll ask the Kingdom healers for help. They’ve seen and experienced more than any of us. I’m sure there’s something they can do.”
Healer Farah and Healer Asha nod hopefully at Healer Sarina’s words, but I bite my lip. I don’t want to leave this up to some strangers and the hopes of success. There are so many things that could go wrong by asking for help. It may cost us time we don’t have.
“Contact Beta Ryan. We need to let him know of these developments,” Healer Farah instructs. I move back to the table and look down at the page detailing the toxins killing Ethan.
The list of ingredients that will make antidotes for each toxin is listed at the bottom of the page, so I make note of them in my notebook. If they want to wait for help, let them. While they twiddle their thumbs waiting, I’ll make myself useful and search for the herbs and plants we need.
Sitting still is not an option.
Ethan needs my help, and my help is exactly what he’s going to get.
With my list written, I flip Healer Sarina’s holistic remedies book open and begin searching for the antidote ingredients.
