Chapter 160

Sarah POV

I squirmed a little. “Once or twice.”

He was silent for a moment. “Can you remember any details of these dreams?”

I thought about it for a moment, and then I described the forest, which felt familiar and comfortable. I talked about the way the moonlight seemed to make the moonlight sparkle and the way the trees and leaves were more blue than green. I described hunting that first rabbit, and the fox, and then other things.

I told him about how he and I had interacted in wolf form, about how sometimes the girls showed up, about how I saw other wolves, like Travis and Ella and Scott.

“Scott’s been in your dreams?”

I gently rolled my eyes at the note of possessiveness in Zane’s tone. “I suppose you’ll never tell me what you dislike so much about Scott, and that is completely up to you, but I can tell you even with the limited information I have that he and I are never going to become important to each other. In my dream, I could tell he wanted me to join in him hunting a deer, but I declined, so even in my subconscious, I’m not interested.”

Zane put his own cup down. We had the windows open, and I heard birds outside, which made me think of The Nightingale, which made me think of the girls. They were coming home in a few hours, but I missed them.

“Scott and I actually got along at first,” Zane said. “He’s seven years younger than I am, and I wasn’t told about him, our father didn’t know about him either until I was sixteen. I was shown this rather small, even timid-looking beta pup and told he was my half-brother. I showed him my room and asked if he liked sports.”

I nodded, seeing Scott clearly that way.

“Later, I found out Scott’s mother was an omega and that she’d raised him alone. I actually told Scott at the time that I didn’t care, that he was my half-brother and a part of my family. He acted like he appreciated it, but I came to realize he didn’t believe me.

“I’m no psychologist. I have no idea what sort of trauma Scott experienced growing up with an openly omega single mother on the other side of the territory. But he seems to me completely incapable of trusting others even as he constantly seeks out people to trust him.

“Perhaps it’s just where he feels safest, being trusted but not trusting, not being in danger of being betrayed or abandoned.”

Zane grew silent, and I prompted, “How did he betray you?”

“A dozen small things: undercutting my memories of my mother, implying my father was dictating my life choices, asking me over and over if I really thought I were strong enough to be a Pack Alpha, and then finally trying to come between me and Olivia. By that point, I just wanted to avoid him.”

“What did he do with Olivia?”

“Oh, said she was too beautiful to be burdened as the mate to the Pack Alpha, said she was too free in spirit to be tied down with children right away. I actually didn’t pay attention to it at first, which was a mistake. She seemed so confident, I didn’t realize how much he was getting to her until she asked me one day to keep him away from her.

“I warned him off, but he pretended he and Olivia were friends and said I was making it up that Olivia didn’t want to be ‘with’ him, but by then I was thoroughly aware of his bullshit and just told him to watch his manners.”

Zane’s eyes turned dark. “I talked with him briefly at Olivia’s funeral, and he seemed almost smug, as though he knew my marriage wouldn’t last, which made me feel ridiculous because it was about her, not me. I wanted to mourn her and figure out what to do to help the girls, not be taunted by this half-brother who had proven to be so unpleasant to deal with.”

“Was he ever an uncle to Grace?”

“No. Thank the goddess he’s never shown any actual interest in the girls.”

I nodded, but one thing he’d said was bothering me. “Openly omega.”

He frowned. “What?”

“You said Scott’s mother was ‘openly omega’ as though she were at fault for not hiding her biological reality. You and Melissa talk about human-wolf equality and uniting wolves, but here is a type of werewolf who’s literally just born a certain way, and you can’t hide your disgust.”

Zane opened his mouth.

“And don’t tell me it’s something only a wolf can understand.”

He closed his mouth.

“You know, I read some books lately, though I had to be sneaky about it. I understand the myths about omegas who steal away husbands and wives. I’ve read about old tales where they even stole children to raise them up to be sexual predators.

“I know about how omegas are such a small part of the wolf population and are responsible for so much crime. But I also know about how territories that don’t treat omegas like cultural embarrassments don’t see those sorts of statistics. Most omegas are raised to believe they’re sexual deviants sent down by the darkness to make good wolves stray, how do you expect them to behave?”

“I’ve heard these arguments before.”

“Of course you have. What I don’t understand is why they haven’t moved you to treat omegas differently. What is this need alphas, betas, and gammas have to see omegas as perversions and predators?

“And even more to the point, how can you ever expect to lead a society of equality when you yourself refuse to address the greatest inequality of that society?”

“You’ve taken this cause to heart, I see,” Zane said almost coldly.

“What if I were an omega? Would I be a horrible person then?”

“You’re not a wolf.”

“It’s a hypothetical.”

Zane held up his hands in protest. “It is impossible for me to imagine something like that. It’s unfair of you to ask.”

“How can you advocate for change and then refuse to even try to imagine a simple scenario? Do you really believe it’s impossible for omegas to be good, decent people?”

Zane looked at me oddly and seemed to be struggling with something.

“No,” he said.

“No, what?”

“No, it’s not impossible for me to imagine good, decent omegas. I’ve met them, and so have you.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Oracles.”

I was certain I had heard him wrong.

“Oracles and priests. Those born as omegas who wish to serve society use their gifts as devotees to the Luna Temple.”

I just sat there staring at him. It actually did make sense, but I wasn’t sure why.

“And now you know one of our greatest secrets, so bear in mind the trust I’m showing you. That’s how seriously I value your opinion and need you to understand the stakes here. Most wolves don’t even know.”

“So, an omega has three choices in life: hide what they are and pretend to be a gamma or beta, openly live a life of infamy and shame, or, well.”

“Or become among the most powerful among us all. Yes.” He sat back in his chair and folded his arms.

“Ultimately, I go to the Luna Temple as a supplicant. Ultimately, in many ways, those omegas command alphas.”