Chapter 90

My baby girl turns out to be okay. So many doctors in and out of my room have been tending to us. To his credit, Derek and the girls haven’t wanted to leave my side.

Tris had started crying when Derek tried to leave last night. “We want Esme to be okay,” Tris tearily admitted.

Bea was firm in her stance, too. “She’s family now. We’re not leaving.”

If only that applied to Sadie, too. But that isn’t ever said. Instead, Derek and I make strong eye contact.

I let the girls sleep in the bed with me, and I even managed to get some sleep in between periods of stress.

Derek sits in a chair next to me. Does he even sleep? Is he capable of doing such a thing?

My eyes blink open after another fit of sleep, and I turn to face him to my left.

“Hi,” I whisper.

Derek’s gaze finds mine. It softens immediately as he reaches for my hand wrapped around Bea.

“Hi.”

“Are you okay?”

He sighs. “I’m supposed to be asking you that.”

I breathe a small laugh out of my nose. “I’m doing my best.” My eyes wander to his daughters. “They’re certainly helping.”

“They love you, Esme.”

“I love them.”

His hand squeezes mine. I turn to look back at him again.

“They need a real mother. One who doesn’t look for reasons to stay that involve being selfish.”

I put my head back on the pillow, watching Derek through eyes that burn and tingle.

He shakes his own head now. “You deserve so much better than what you’ve been through. I don’t know how you still hold so much love in your heart.”

“I think that there might be a lot of pain and trauma in my mind…but there have been so many good things to keep my heart open. People like you, Bea, Tris, Annie, Lily. My chosen family has kept me safe.”

“You…” he gives me another shake of his head. “I am in awe of you.”

“You’re not so bad yourself,” I respond as my smile cracks open on my face.

Thankfully, the doctors clear me to go home several hours later.

“You’re okay to leave. But you have to be on bed rest for a few days. Don’t stress, take a few days from work if you must. Do what’s best for your health.”

I open my mouth to argue how difficult that will be, but Derek steps up. “I’ll make sure she rests.”

Raising my eyebrows to his back is the best I can do. The doctor has diverted his attention to Derek now.

“Get her to walk around the house at least twice a day. No extra exerting of energy.”

“What about Sammy?” Bea asks her father.

“The cat?” he questions, looking at the young girl. “What about him?” “We need to make sure he’s been fed.”

The doctor’s eyebrow is up now, matching my expression. “I’m sure you and your sister can help Miss Thorne care for the cat, right?”

Bea and Tris look at each other, and something about their genuine excitement gives my heart a tug.

“They’ll be great at helping me,” I interrupt. “I wouldn’t trust anyone else.”

We get moving into Derek’s car, with his daughters strapped in the back.

“You mean it? You’ll take care of Sammy?” I whisper to my boyfriend. “I know you weren’t so keen on the idea of getting a cat for them.”

He shrugs. “They’re learning to be responsible this way. Besides, you can’t clean up after him. You need to worry about you first. We can take care of Sammy for you.”

Ryan never wanted to take care of Sammy. No matter how many times I’d begged him to put food out, to clean the litterbox, to even play with him were always met with disgruntled attitudes.

Now I have these two angels willing to make sure that we’re both taken care of.

The girls walk ahead of us to unlock my front door, staying in Derek’s sight. Bea and Tris are giggling, probably just excited to see the cat.

“Should I teach you how to clean cat litter?” I taunt the man as he helps me walk. “Sounds like a hot date idea, right?”

“The best,” he tosses back. “Why don’t the girls show me? You need to get into bed. The last thing we want is for the baby to have any further complications.”

I make a pfffhh noise with my lips as I look at his handsome face. “One of these days, maybe the constant drama will stop.”

Derek’s eyes change, his expression growing cold as he stares ahead. Confused, I look to where his gaze has gone.

Sadie. Standing outside Derek’s apartment door.

“Where are the girls?” He barks at his ex-wife immediately.

“Relax,” she rolls her blue eyes before giving me another death glare. “They went in this tramp’s apartment.”

“I’ve had enough of this, Sadie,” Derek snaps back. We stop in front of my apartment. I want to protect Bea and Tris from seeing their parents fight like this. However, they stand right in the door, petrified.

Tris is already crying. Bea is holding onto her sister.

“I don’t care what you want anymore. You come back into our lives and think you can change them? You messed with me, and I allowed it. You got under my skin, and I allowed it. You should be able to be around your girls. But this?” He gestures to me. “You’ve gone too far.”

She takes one step closer. “Derek, you have to—”

“I’m talking!” He snaps loudly, startling all of us. “You don’t seem to hear this! I have custody! I have taken care of them! I changed their diapers! I took them to school! I held them when they cried! When you refused to be a mother! I took on the responsibility of being both mom and dad! You think you can just waltz back into our lives, then take your anger out on Esme and her baby? What do you take me for, Sadie?”

“They are my babies! I carried them both!”

“But you don’t know how to be their mother,” he seethes back. “You and I are never going to happen! You will never have even a shred of custody over them!”

“That isn’t—”

“Fucking shut your mouth!” He barks like a literal dog. We’re all still standing here, and I can feel my heart pounding and my head swirling from this argument. “You continue to act out like this? You think you can just attack whoever you want without consequences? I have cameras, Sadie! I know what you’ve been up to! I will get you arrested so fast your head will spin!”

My eyes move to the girls. Tris is trying not to make any noise, but I see Bea’s tears now. I feel so bad for them. I can’t do anything now. This isn’t my place to speak.

“Derek, let me take the girls inside,” I half-whisper. “They shouldn’t have to hear this.”

But he doesn’t answer me. “I will get a restraining order. I will make sure you never see these two again. You want that to be your reality, Sadie?”

I squeeze the man’s hand. “Derek, please.”

Sadie, however, isn’t threatened by her ex’s words. “I knew you were trouble, you fucking whore!”

She comes closer to me, but Derek shields me. His head whirls back to face the redhead. “Sadie! Leave! You have caused enough damage! Look at your daughters and tell me you don’t feel an ounce of remorse for your deplorable actions!”

Sadie’s eyes burn like fire, but she does what he says, and her focus goes to the two crying girls in my doorway.

The little one’s jump at their mother’s stare, and I watch the woman’s eyes soften towards the two. She starts to put her arms out. But they both take steps away, shivering in pure fear.

Tris, to everyone’s surprise, is the only one who speaks. “Mommy, don’t hit us.”

Sadie pulls away, shock cloaking her stunned face. “Tris, baby, I would never hit you.”

The four-year-old wipes at her little tears. “You hurt Esme. You hurt Daddy.”

Her older sister takes her hand and squeezes it. Bea opens her trembling lips. “You hurt us all, Mommy.”

I don’t know what’s going on. The sisters, holding hands at the door with tears and intense fear on their faces, don’t move.

Sadie shakes her head in denial.

“Don’t come back here, Sadie. If you want to talk to the girls, call your lawyer. We’re not doing this anymore.”

“You can’t really believe—”

Derek’s voice has grown flat. “I own this building. I have custody of the girls. I have the money. You are just the ex. I will serve you with papers if I have to. Leave Center City. Don’t come back.”

The other woman looks between everyone with a broken face. I want to feel bad for her. I want to care.

I can’t care about her. I can’t stand her standing there.

I still have no idea how I got to the hospital, but I know Sadie could have killed me and my baby. And that’s enough to absolutely despise her.

So, without another single word, the woman walks off. She turns down the hall, and she doesn’t reappear again.

And the four of us just stand there, watching where she finally, fully, disappeared.