Chapter 72

The following week of work goes by in a blur of contracts, conversations, calls, and lunches at my desk. The best part, though, is that Derek and the girls are part of this week as well.

Bea keeps me updated on her ears when I see her. “All the girls in my class without pierced ears were so jealous.”

“Of course they were. Who wouldn’t be?” She is positively glowing.

Tris still feels a little left out with her ears not being pierced. So, during my lunch break in the middle of the week, I ran to the mall to pick up some stickers that she can wear.

It’s strange. I swear I can feel how close we’re growing every day I spend with Derek. We’re again back on the Gimble project, discussing what’s best for the project and the company.

More time with him and the girls has my heart absolutely fluttering.

Except there’s still one other thing.

Sadie.

On Friday, after Sadie has continued to butt in with the girls and with Derek, I’m sitting with him during our lunch as we discuss the final layout for the Gimble project.

I take a bite of the Chinese food I have in front of me, chewing as Derek’s speaking.

“Valentino and I were able to meet up last night,” he explains. “He’s ecstatic to be working with Jackson, Paulson, and Pomperio.”

I smirk. “Who wouldn’t be?”

Derek chuckles. “The good news is nothing with Max has interfered here. I know it’s going to be an issue at some point, but right now the most important thing to do is make sure everyone’s happy.”

“I’m guessing you got the court summons then,” I add, feeling some frustration.

“They showed up at the house. It was disgusting. Sadie kept bugging me about the whole thing. Like she gives a shit.”

I perk up, distracted by his ex-wife. “Sadie was with you yesterday?”

He nods.

“Why’s she around suddenly? I mean, you never even really brought her up, so I didn’t have much to go off of. Bea’s the one who mentioned her for the first time.”

“That’s a loaded question,” Derek responds. “It’s part of the reason why I’ve been so careful with my words and daughters.”

A few months ago, none of these questions would have been on my radar, let alone coming out of my mouth. But we’re not just subordinate and boss anymore. We’re also friends.

“Look, Derek, I think it’s pretty obvious that Sadie’s back because she wants something.”

“Obviously.”

“So, what the hell even happened between you two?”

“That’s not really something I like to discuss, Esme.”

I roll my eyes, putting down my Chinese on the desk. “And no one in my life knew I’d been assaulted, no one else stood up for me when Ken tried to do the same, and no one else has been so understanding and kind to me in months.”

I push my hair out of my face, subconsciously reaching for my necklace and playing with it as I’ve grown used to doing. “You know more about me than every person in my life combined.”

He clears his throat, but Derek’s clearly uncomfortable.

“Look, you said it before that no one else in your life…knows you like I do. You know what those words mean to someone like me? Through all this bullshit that I’ve been dealing with?”

I can’t say the actual words. Not unless I know for certain it’ll mean the same to him as it does to me.

Derek messes with his suit jacket, still trying to avoid looking at me. But I keep pestering him.

“You’ve told me about your girls, about yourself. You are a good person with a great heart, but how can I know who you are without this part of your life?”

“Because that’s not who I am anymore.”

My hand drops from my necklace. Derek’s teeth are clenched and he’s red, breathing heavily as he finally gives me his full attention.

“Bea and Tris have a mom who’s never been around. Even before we split, they were used to spending all their time with their nanny. They considered the nanny their real mother.”

My eyes widen.

“Sadie became a different person in our marriage. I knew her as someone gentle, sweet, even bubbly.” I don’t think I’d use any of those words to describe the tall redhead. “She hated being pregnant. She hated taking care of the babies. She was an angry, bitter woman.”

That part really gets to me. How can someone hold so much resentment for the children that she brought into the world?

“Then why did you get pregnant twice?” I’m quiet and tiptoeing around the frustration.

“Because I’ve always wanted to be a father. Sadie knew that, and I thought she wanted to be a mom. But then she was unhappy every time Bea took up her time. She was a little baby who couldn’t even fend for herself.”

My heart is bursting with care for his daughters.

“And when she was pregnant with Tris, that was the real beginning of the end. Because Sadie had a difficult pregnancy and spent her time away from Bea, and away from me.”

“Really showed her true colors,” I murmur.

“So, I filed for a divorce right after Sadie had Tris. She wasn’t the woman I married. She wasn’t the person I fell in love with.”

I can’t imagine holding my baby for nine months only to want nothing to do with it after it arrives. I love my job, and my path in life now that Ryan’s no longer in it, but I also want to be a mom.

Every night, I stare at my stomach, my hands resting on top of it, as I imagine the little baby growing inside of me. Even if that baby comes out looking just like Ryan, I’m going to love that little baby till the day I die.

“I couldn’t imagine Bea and Tris growing up with two parents who only bickered and didn’t know how to handle their children. I love my little girls more than anything. But Sadie? She’s not a mom. She’s just the one who made me a father.”

I want to cry at every word he’s said. Derek looks distraught with divulging the truth.

Instead, I put my hand on his arm, comforting him to the best of my ability.

“You’re a great father, Derek,” I remind him. “Anyone you meet will see that love you hold for the girls.”

My boss shakes his head. “Sadie showing back up, seemingly trying to insert herself back into our lives like she never left? It’s a slap in the face.”

Which means he’s absolutely not in love with her.

“You have custody. Why don’t you just tell her to leave?” I whisper, becoming more aware of how long I’ve left my hand on Derek’s arm.

He sniffs, wiping under her nose with a napkin nearby. “Because my girls deserve to know their mom. They shouldn’t be punished for Sadie’s mistakes.”

My heart, strangely, grows warm. Hearing him basically admit he wants nothing to do with Sadie and wants to make his girls happy? Maybe it’s a little selfish of me.

But I don’t believe Sadie has good intentions regarding her daughters and Derek.

I clear my throat a little, trying to give Derek a moment.

“But you’re still doing what you think is best. And even if she’s not the world’s best mom, you are allowing Bea and Tris to spend time with her will mean everything to them.”

He raises an eyebrow. “You sure?”

I nod, smiling. “You’re their hero, Derek.”

He smiles back. “You’re going to be such a great mother to your baby.”

My arm finally pulls away.

“Thank you.”

He nods. “How is the baby? You both doing okay?”

“Waiting for our next appointment. Everything seems to be going well besides, you know, all the lawsuits and drama around the end of my marriage.”

Derek can’t help but snort out a laugh. “That’s very true. And the gender is still a secret from the world?”

“Oh of course, since I know how much it bugs you,” I reply back with my own laugh.

“Am I able to come with you? Accompany you? It’s genuinely important to me.”

I blush, looking down at my hands as I laugh a little.

“Sure.” I give him my eye contact again. “And thank you.”

My warm chest just reminds me that in this fight for possibly earning Derek’s heart, I’m ahead.