I Gave Up My Alpha After Rebirth

Juniper's POV

I'm lying here in this hospital bed, waiting to die. Every breath felt like swallowing razor blades. My lungs had basically given up on the whole staying-alive thing. I stared at the ceiling tiles, counting them for the millionth time. One, two, three, and that fourth one with the water stain that looked like a wolf's head. Yeah, real subtle universe.

My life, and this is how it ends.

The morphine kept most of the pain away, but it couldn't do anything about the hollowness in my chest that had nothing to do with cancer. I traced the IV line with my finger, noticed my naked ring finger. I'd stopped wearing my wedding band two years ago. Nobody noticed. Not Griffin, not Grace, definitely not Lily, she'd probably throw a party when I finally kicked it.

Through the window, the full moon hung there, fat and bright, calling to the wolf buried inside me who was too weak to answer. I used to love full moons. Griffin and I would run through the forest, our wolves playing around like idiots in love.

When did we stop doing that? When did everything just stop?

The door opened and Nurse Jennifer came in with smile. She messed with my IV drip. "Time for your meds, honey." While she worked, she looked at the empty chair next to my bed. "Your family's not here yet?"

I tried to smile. "They're busy."

"Busy." The way she said it told me exactly what she thought of that excuse. She squeezed my hand, "You rest now. Hit the button if you need me."

After she left, the quiet pressed down on me. I couldn't stop my brain from dragging up every shitty memory I'd been trying to forget, playing them on repeat.

*Griffin in the kitchen laughing with Lily while I washed dishes by myself. "God, Lil, remember that summer at the lake? We were such idiots." He looked at her the way he used to look at me.

That pack barbecue where I stood alone by the food table, pretending I couldn't hear everyone talking. "Poor thing, she doesn't even know." "Tyler calls him dad now, did you hear?" "Well, Griffin basically raised him, so..."

When I found the lump in my breast and asked Griffin to come to the doctor with me. "Babe, Lily needs help with Tyler's dorm move. You can handle a checkup alone, right? It's probably nothing."*

Except it wasn't nothing. It was stage three, and by the time I got my ass to another doctor, it was way too late.

But the memories that really gutted me weren't even from my marriage. They went back further, to one sunny afternoon when I destroyed my family.

*I was twenty-two, wearing that white sundress Mom bought me for my birthday, holding Griffin's picture in my hand, and I knew I was about to break their hearts.

"Juniper, please listen to me." Mom grabbed my hands, her voice shaking. "You're an Alpha's daughter. You deserve someone who will put you first, who will cherish you. That boy—"

"His name is Griffin!" I ripped my hands away, crying so hard I could barely see. "He's my mate. I love him!"

Dad came out of his study, and I felt his Alpha power fill the whole room. "You're making the biggest mistake of your life."

"I love him!"

"You think that's enough?" He laughed, but there was no humor in it. "I've been watching that young Alpha. He's weak. He lets people push him around. He's going to break your heart, Juniper."

"You don't know him!"

Dad's face went completely blank. "Fine. Walk out that door. Marry him. But if you do, you're not my daughter anymore. Don't bother coming back to Moonstone Pack."

Mom started sobbing. "Don't do this, don't make her choose—"

"She already chose."

I ran out of that house, away from them, away from everything they wanted to protect me from. Behind me, Mom screamed: "Juniper! Come back! Baby, please come back!"

I never did.*

A sharp pain yanked me back to the present. I reached for the call button, then stopped. What was the point? More morphine just meant more time stuck in this half-dead limbo.

My phone sat dark on the table next to me. Grace hadn't called in three days. Griffin sent a text yesterday: "At Tyler's grad stuff. Maybe tomorrow."

Always tomorrow with him.

But the contact at the top of my favorites hurt to look at. "Mom's Cell." I'd saved it years ago when I heard through the grapevine that Dad got sick. I almost called.

What would I even say? "Hey Mom, turns out you were right, my marriage is a dumpster fire and I'm dying alone while my husband plays house with his side piece and their kid"?

Someone told me Dad recovered but looked about ten years older.

They're better off not knowing. Let them remember me as the stubborn kid who chose love over family. Not this pathetic dying woman who got exactly what they warned me about.

The door flew open. Grace.

She stood there with her phone in one hand, keys in the other, wearing a pretty blue dress. For the graduation party. She looked so much like Griffin with that golden-brown hair, but she had my hazel eyes. Right now, those eyes just looked annoyed.

"Mom." She didn't come closer. "I've only got ten minutes. Tyler's graduation party starts soon and I promised I'd help."

"Grace." My voice came out barely there. "Thanks for coming."

She did that dramatic sigh teenagers are so good at. But this time it felt like a knife. "Look, I know you're sick, but I need to say something."

I waited.

"Why are you being so selfish?"