Chapter 3

Lena's shoulders hunched, and her eyes reddened.

Mom pulled her close and shot Dad a glare. "Stop being so harsh." She stroked Lena's hair. "Finish eating first. I'll buy a bigger cake for your eighteenth birthday in three days."

Lena took small bites of the cake, her eyes constantly drifting toward my bedroom door.

Mom and Dad ate in silence. Four chairs, one empty.

I settled into the vacant seat and said to Lena, "Congratulations on graduating."

Late that night, Mom was making Lena's bed. Lena sat on the edge, fingers unconsciously twisting the blanket corner.

"Mom," her voice was soft, "does Ella... hate me?"

Mom's hands froze while arranging the pillow. "Why would you think that?"

"Because I have everything." Lena looked down. "I get to go to school, graduate, make friends. Ella has nothing. Today... she must have felt so sad."

Mom sat on the bed and pulled Lena into her arms.

"She definitely doesn't hate you." Mom's voice was slightly hoarse. "Your sister is just... sick. She wants what's best for you more than anyone."

"But when I invited Ella to my graduation ceremony today, the way she looked at me..." Lena's voice caught. "She must have thought I was showing off."

"No, sweetheart. That's not it."

Mom held Lena, gently patting her back.

I stood by the doorway, my fingers digging into the frame—though I couldn't actually grip anything.

How could I ever hate you? I'm proud of you.

"Sometimes I think," Lena buried her face in Mom's shoulder, "it would be better if I were the sick one. Then Ella could live a normal life."

No. I would never want you to endure the same pain I have.

"Don't say that!" Mom's voice suddenly turned sharp. She pushed Lena back slightly, staring into her eyes. "Never say those words again, do you hear me?"

Lena was startled and nodded.

Mom sighed and pulled her close again. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have raised my voice. It's just... you can't say things like that. You're both my precious girls."

"Go take a shower. Then get a good night's sleep." She kissed Lena's forehead. "Don't overthink it."

A while later, Lena emerged from her room carrying pajamas.

She lingered by my bedroom door for a moment before heading to the bathroom.

I followed her, watching as she turned on the light. Her reflection in the mirror showed red-rimmed eyes.

"You know, Ella, my wish today was that when I start college, I'll take you to see my school." She turned on the faucet and began brushing her teeth. "We can walk around campus together, go to the library together, eat in the cafeteria together."

"I'm going to study hard and become a doctor someday." She started talking to herself.

"And then—I'll cure your illness." She pointed at her reflection in the mirror. I knew she was talking to me.

My tears began flowing uncontrollably.

I remembered the year I was diagnosed, when Lena hugged me and said, "Don't be scared, sis. When I grow up to be a doctor, I'll definitely cure you."

Eight years had passed, and she was still making the same wish.

But Lena, this wish will never come true.

Lena finished washing her face and walked toward the bathtub. She reached out, her fingers touching the shower curtain ring.

Get away from there!

But she couldn't hear me at all.

I didn't want her to see my body submerged in the water, my pale face.

No!