Chapter 84

Renee’s POV

Every time I pass by a mirror I stop and inspect myself. Unapologetically letting my eyes roam over my body even if I’m in public. Pregnant. I imagine my belly growing and getting bigger. I definitely have that glow as people say. My skin is supple, my hair is shiner.

Not like when I was pregnant with Debbie. With Debbie I was in the process of changing my appearance and identity. I worse loose fitting clothing and was too anxious to have any kind of glow about me.

“Ma’am are you in line?” A woman holding a Chanel bag and sporting a bold red lipstick asks me.

“Go ahead,” I tell her and move closer to the mirror plastered on a column in the middle of the department store. She eyes me without hiding her judgement but I ignore her.

I turn to the side and put a hand on my lower belly. Butterflies swarm on my stomach and I smile. Debbie is going to be an older sister. I almost laugh out loud. She’s going to love that role.

I finally move away from the mirror and move onto the children’s section. I haven’t told Eric yet, but I’m thinking I can get Debbie a “Big Sister” sweater and have that be the announcement. But maybe that’s too much.

I just told Eric we need to take it slow. I let my fingers linger across the feathery soft pink sweaters in the little girls section. The short sweaters hang on the small rack and my heart melts.

I glance over at the large sign hanging from the ceiling that reads BOYS in big red print. It’s funny to think that in a shirt nine months I could be in that section.

There’s all kinds of old wives tales that predict if you’re having a boy or a girl, but none of them held true when I was pregnant with Debbie. I craved salty food, I had no morning sickness, and I carried high.

This pregnancy is completely different. Aside the difference in symptoms, I also don’t have to hide who the father is.

Strolling up and down the aisles mindlessly peeking through the racks I push aside the intrusive thought at what this pregnancy inevitably means.

Once Eric knows I’m having a baby, our relationship totally escalates. There’s no chance of us taking it slow anymore. This baby brings us together forever, and that terrifies me.

Eric is making an effort to win me and over and that’s a testimony to his changing heart, but what if the announcement of having a baby throws him off? What if it scares him so much he decides this is all happening too fast?

My stomach tangles in knots and this time I don’t think it’s because of the baby. I look down at the pink sweater in my hand. It’s white bubbly front that says “Big Sister” seems too happy now.

This shirt is made for a family that is certain of who they are. Suddenly, I’m not so certain of anything now.

I hurry out of the store feeling hot and fight back tears the rest of the drive home.

By the time I pull up I decide that I’ll hold off on telling Eric for now. I need to better discern how he’ll handle the news.

The sun is setting and orange rays of light beam through dark wooden branches of the large oak tree that’s planted on the front yard.

I’ve always loved our house at this time of day. The white paneling reflects the golden glow and the garden seems illuminated.

“Hi mom!” I hear Debbie shout as I shut the car door, I look around for her but don’t see her. “Over here!” She says. “Look what daddy built,”

And then my eyes land on her. She swings from a rope and tire that dangles from a thick branch, green leaves rustling overhead.

Habitual instinct kicks in and I hold back a yelp of worry. Debbie catches my reaction and giggles as she jumps off the tire and lands on all fours. “Tada!” She sings.

I clutch my cheer. “Be careful,” I tell her anyway. Debbie runs over to me and wraps me in a tight hug. “Remember Jasper said that I’m all better?” I hug her back and hold her a lighter more tightly than usual.

“He said you’re almost fully better,” I correct her. Jasper also declared in his report that she would likely exceed her peers in terms of physical health and performance considering she’s offspring of the Alpha, but I don’t tell her that part. The last thing Debbie needs is a big head.

“What do you think?” Eric asks coming out from the garage. I go to respond but become momentarily speechless.

Despite the cool spring air, he’s in a fitted black shirt that accentuates his muscles that clearly have just been put to work as evidenced by the thick veins lacing down his forearms. He has a white towel draped over his shoulder and a sheen of sweat above his eyebrows. His hands are covered in oil and some dirt is smudged on his forearms.

I didn’t know Manuel labor could be so attractive. Eric watches me looking at him and smiles knowingly. “After I put together the swing, I figured I’d finally give the car an oil change that you’ve been asking for,” he says and then winks at Debbie and I have no idea why.

“Yup!” Debbie chimes in. “And he said he’ll make your favorite dinner, which I told him was ravioli,”

I cross my arms over my chest and raise an eyebrow in suspicion. “Debbie. that’s your favorite dinner,” I tell her and she laughs.

“You tricked me!” Eric says feigning anger and runs after her. Debbie runs away squealing but is no match for Eric’s speed. He scoops her up and tickles her sides as Debbie cries with laughter and thrashes about. I can’t help but laugh myself.

I watch as Eric wrestles with Debbie imagining how Eric would look holding a baby. The scene plays out before my eyes as Eric goes from rough housing a young kid to soothing a tiny baby.

“Why’d you want to know my favorite dinner anyway?” I shout over Debbie’s laughter, though I think I already know the answer.

“He’s trying to win you over!” Debbie reveals as Eric holds her upside down.

“We had a deal!” Eric yells back at her playfully.

“A deal?” I ask thoroughly intrigued and step further up the driveway, the gravel crunches beneath my boots.

“Say nothing!” Eric shakes Debbie who is clearly getting a kick from putting Eric.

“He’s been coming to me to ask how he can make you fall in love with him,” Debbie says just as Eric flips her back side up.

“That’s it! Only one scoop of ice cream tonight,” Eric teases Debbie and tosses her in the air.

I stand stunned as I think about how long Eric has been sneaking off to ask Debbie questions about me that I might fall more in love with him. It’s this very behavior that does make me more and more attracted to him.

He doesn’t act on what he thinks I would like or what a typical romantic gesture would be, he goes to my kid, our kid, to personalize his actions.

“It’s steak,” I tell them. “That’s my favorite dinner,” I’m not sure if Eric hears me because he’s too busy grindingly madly at Debbie, she might be the only other girl in the world that Eric is in love with, besides me. And it’s that moment I know: Eric is the one. “Also, I’m pregnant,” I blurt out.

This time, I know they hear me.