Chapter 11

Eric’s POV

I know I’m making her uncomfortable, but does she even think about how she makes me feel? She looks a bit ridiculous sitting in that big leather swivel chair practically engulfing her.

If she just sat up straight and even pretended she had an ounce of power, she would look more natural. If she were my fated-mate then all this would be hers. No. Stop. These are the very thoughts I detest and that drove me towards being cold to Annie to the point of her leaving.

Besides I’ve worked too hard to just have some woman come and take it. That’s all women are after anyways. It always has been.

I squint at Renee and let out a frustrated sigh. Renee tenses at this and I’m fully aware I’m pushing her away despite my impulse to draw her near- if only to get a whiff of her all too familiar scent.

Annie’s face formulates in my mind, it’s the last clear image from memory I have of her. Since her pronounced death the images of her are fading, becoming dull and fuzz around the edges. It’s surprising but I didn’t expect for the details of her skin to already evaporate from memory already.

Though with Renee entering my life, long forgotten memories are coming back unexpectedly. Like now, seeing Renee hunched over the desktop with laser focus on her task carries the same energy as when Annie would doodle in her notebook.

Of course, dabbling in art or drawing is a common hobby and it doesn’t prove Annie and Renee are the same person.

That’s the strongest memory I have of her. Annie leaned back against a tree in our backyard with a pencil in hand and a large notebook draped over her knees. The orange sun reflects off her golden hair.

It’s interesting, I never expected that image to be burned into my mind. At the time, I just remember thinking she was out there to get away from me, thinking it was an odd way to have me come chase after her. Which I never did, I’m not even sure she saw me looking at her.

She’d sit outside for hours staring at the sunset despite my offering to have an art studio built for her so she wouldn’t have to sit on the grass and stain her clothes that I bought her. Though in this memory, she’s not in any expensive dress. She’s in a pair of old jeans a loose gray sweater.

Come to think of it, she wouldn’t wear those designer clothes too often. She’d wear it once and then I’d hardly see it again. I assumed she was one of those woman who didn’t repeat outfits, but looking back on that now that doesn’t seem fitting.

I thought I had her all figured out. A shallow woman, only wanting me for my money and status- just like the rest of them. Of course, she’d offer me perfect intimacy and the only complaining she ever did was for me to love her the way a fated-mate should.

The very thought of it still causes me to recoil. How silly is it for an alpha to be consumed by emotions. As a leader I can’t let something at fickle as feelings influence me so greatly. The idea of a fated-mate is nothing but a distraction, a mere weakness that an Alpha can’t afford.

I was so sure of this during my time together with Annie, though now that she’s gone I’m beginning to think I never truly had her figured out.

Even up until the moment she left me was a shock. She rejected me. My perfectly submissive wife came out of her shell when push comes the shove, just as a true Luna would.

Looking at Renee now, I can sense a faint pulling on my heart like a phantom limb tingling to reach out and draw her near, except it’s not Renee that I feel this towards. She’s merely the vessel, a casing which embodies the essence of Annie.

Perhaps I can reconcile my ill ending with Annie by making amends with Renee. Building a relationship with her will somehow abridge me and Annie’s lost connection.

Though this is exactly the issue. Emotions and feelings are illogical. In fact, there’s no evidence linking them together at all and believe me- I checked.

Just yesterday, Johhny, the private investigator I hired to look into Renee delivered the file he got on her and it was paper thin. This woman has hardly made any kind of mark on the world in her personal life. All Johhny found was her professional makings, all of which I already knew.

It’s like Renee didn’t exist until she was old enough to work, which is odd and a bit suspicious but isn’t that the case with the majority of people? Again, nothing specifically linking to Annie, just broad strokes of similarities between the two of them and the rest of the world.

Perhaps the least surprising yet most disappointing finding Johhny delivered was that Renee is indeed wolfless, the biggest indicator that Annie is not Renee and yet, I can’t seem to accept that as an answer.

Maybe I should hire Johnny to look into Debbie. While she shows no wolf traits, there has to be an explanation for this need I have to protect her, more so than I do with Nilo.

I pull my eyes off Renee, needing to clear my head. I can’t do that. This woman has a right to privacy. That child for damn sure does.

Just then, the image of Renee and Jasper embracing flashes in my mind and I squeeze my jaw shut to prevent myself from howling out. My anger takes me by surprise. I just acknowledged that Renee has a right to privacy, but why does Jasper get access into her personal life?

The flash of jealousy was aggressive enough to make me hastily come up with an excuse to bring her back to work, to bring her back to me.

Truth is her designs were fine. More than fine, her talent is impressive. There’s no one else in the company that could compete with her skill.

On our way here I told the security guard to go in and make some changes to the file and not ask any questions.

Another issue with emotions is they deny all reasoning. All I knew in that moment is I needed Renee back here, feeling as if this is where she belongs. Just as the urge to pull her off the chair and show her just as much becomes too unbearable, Renee looks up with wide eyes.

“I’m finished,” she tells me. I force the tension to leave my body and relax my muscles as I stride over. I’m sure the errors are all taken care of, but maybe I’ll get lucky and find an honest mistake and she’ll have to stay longer.

I don’t even know why I want her around so much, all I know is, like Annie, she’s a puzzle I can’t solve.

She stays in the desk and I bend at my torso next to her. Our breath mixes together. I feel her stiffen ever so slightly and both a thrill and offense course through me. I can hardly focus on the design, though one thing is evident her work is remarkable.

I know Annie doodled and would draw, but I never paid much attention to her work. Now I wish I did because this work is unique. There would be no way to duplicate this kind of talent, like a finger print, I’d be able to detect a match.

I move in closer and try to regain focus on the assignment, then suddenly her smell reaches me and I can’t think of anything else.

Suddenly the door to my office bursts open.

“What are you doing?” Mia shouts.