Chapter 58

Killian

Elena took the chair across from Alice, as if trying to put as much space between us as she could. Her face was flushed from being outside, and it had been hours since Alice said she had left. It was like looking at the real Elena, the one free from social constraints and anxieties.

She didn’t look surprised or unhappy to see me, and it almost seemed that my presence brought her to some secret resolution or decision. But I could only read so much from her serene face, the ease and grace in her limbs as they reseted on the arms of the chairs. The dirt in her nails was a stark contrast to the white of her skin.

She was at peace with herself, in her body and soul, and that sense of oneness radiated out of her. It was like magic, her aura, and I wanted to bottle it up and keep it with me at all times.

“Killian was just telling me about the success of the event you planned, Elena,” Alice said to break through the opening awkward silence. “Despite the upsetting interruption, you should be really proud.”

“The feedback from the community has been very positive, even in just a short amount of time,” I added.

“I’m so glad,” Elena said, and even with a smile on her face. She was watching me, a feline quality to her stare, and I felt myself growing hot under her gaze.

“It really is all thanks to you, everyone missed you,” I told her, and for a moment her face wavered. “And Kana’s rescue mission has been successful, so far.”

She nodded, taking a deep breath, clearly reliving the dramatic moment in her mind.

“That will be good for the campaign,” she said. Ouch.

“I guess,” I said, rubbing a hand up the back of my hair. “I thought it would be good for us, too.”

Suddenly I felt naked as she looked at me, balanced on my back foot and I would either fall or have to lunge forward to stay upright.

“And Natalie agreed to speak to a therapist today,” I told the two women, “so I am hopeful that that bodes well for her future with us. She clearly has a lot of trauma she needs to work through.”

“I am so happy to hear that,” Alice said, reaching out to put her hand on my arm in support. “Thank you for getting her to do that.”

I nodded to my mother-in-law, but Elena’s eyes were still like marbles. She was still unreachable.

“I’ll be honest, Elena,” I said, a small glance at Alice and then deciding it didn’t matter that she heard this, “I’m almost glad she kissed me. If she hadn’t, maybe I wouldn't know for sure how much I want to be with you.”

Alice gasped, and then tried to hide the wide smile on her face. Elena remained cool, but I could feel her trembling inside.

“Kissing Natalie…” I had to be tactful here, “I felt nothing, I felt numb. I wondered where you were, and even in those seconds it was happening I knew I only wanted to kiss you for the rest of my life.”

Elena’s nose was twitching softly, and I knew it as a sign that she was fighting the urge to react. Her eyes were open wide and fixed on me.

“You are mine, and I am yours.”

I hoped she wouldn’t shun me from her mind as she had so often lately.

“I know.”

Alice’s hands were pressed together like a prayer, her fingers against her lips. Her eyes darted between us and I could tell she knew something was happening under the surface.

“Come home to me.”

Elena took a deep breath and shifted around in her chair, looking at her hands and then to Alice and then finally back to me.

“I’m staying here tonight,” she said, and I felt my heart sinking immediately.

“Okay,” I said, trying to stay upright.

“But,” she added, “I will come home tomorrow.”

Home.

I felt my face twitching like an idiot as I smiled with relief and tried to remain cool about it. But I also didn’t care how I looked because all I cared about was Elena.

“Very good,” I said, sounding more like an Alpha again. “It is my turn to cook, I believe.”

Elena smiled at that, a small joke between us since we both know she’s better in the kitchen.

“Maybe we should do that together,” she said casually, standing from her seat. “I’ll walk you out.”

My heart was in my throat as we stood on the porch, the air was still warm and the last rays of the sun peaking through the trees.

“I’m still hopeful for us,” I told her, daring to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. My thumb traced down her jaw lightly, not suggesting anything. “I will do anything I can to prove to you that I mean what I say.”

She held my hand and brought it back to her face, letting her face fall into my cupped palm. Her skin was soft as silk and her breath was warm on my wrist.

“I hoped it would be different this time,” she whispered, and I wondered if that was meant for me or someone else.

“What do you mean?”

She closed her eyes and nuzzled her cheek into my hand, then planted a small kiss in the center of my palm.

“Good night, Killian,” she told me, stepping away.

“Good night, Luna Elena.”

I was distracted all the way home in the best way, focusing on the positive notion that my wife and Fated Mate was coming back to me. I tried to push away the nagging thought about whatever her last comment meant, but knew it would just make me crazy before I saw her again.

Sleep was hard to grasp that night, but once it came I was whisked away on a fantasy with Elena as the star. We were in the kitchen, cooking, but mostly making a mess of the food and each other. I woke up smiling, my body’s reaction to my dream evident from under the sheets.

Natalie seemed to be waiting for me in the dining room, an untouched plate of food sitting before her.

“Good morning,” I said formally.

“Good morning, Alpha,” Natalie said.

I didn’t love that she started calling me that, but if it was her way of separating me from my role in the Pack, so be it.

“How did your session go yesterday?” I was going to keep a close eye on her rehabilitation process. “Do you think it will be helpful to keep seeing Dr. Krawl?”

“It was good, actually, really good,” Natalie said, her voice full of humility. “I get along with her, and I think we already did some good work. I ended up staying for over two hours.”

My eyebrows went up. “Wow, that’s great,” I told her sincerely. “I know this could be painful, but I know that you have to go through pain to deal with it. And maybe you’ll find some answers about what happened to you.”

She made a face, almost biting her lip to hold in some urgent secret.

“What?”

“It’s just,” Natalie looked around the room, like the words she needed might be written on the wall somewhere. “I do, well, I am starting to remember those days. It’s just images now, some words and voices, I need to take time to put the pieces together.”

“That’s impressive, but Dr. Krawl is one of the top psychiatrists in her field.”

“Yeah, it’s just,” Natalie was fighting something and couldn’t look me in the eye. “The Rogues who took me, they kept talking about someone on the inside. They had a mole, their attacks weren’t random.”

I felt rage welling up within me, the hurt of such a betrayal already fueling a fiery desire for revenge.

“Did they say who it was?”

Natalie nodded, looking frightened.

“They kept repainting a name,” she said, her voice thin. “They kept saying ‘Elena.’”