Chapter 46

Killian

We took a day to prepare for the trip, since both the Alpha and Luna could not suddenly leave for days without notice. I had to pass off my responsibilities to my Betas, and in light of recent events, I was down a wolf.

Tiffany’s betrayal was still an open wound. Though cutting our bond was more painful for her, I still felt bruised to my bones. But the world doesn’t wait for me to wallow on the loss, and I had Lucas promote a Gamma to be her replacement.

“I have a few in mind, Sir,” he explained, “and this could be a good time to put some of them to the test.”

I raised an eyebrow in question.

He cleared his throat. “Without the Alpha around, a candidate might be more comfortable, more honest in their trial period.”

“I understand,” I said, amused. “Well don’t let the mice get too comfortable while the cat is away.”

I patted his shoulder, sending him off to his task.

The household staff was mostly self-sufficient, and I could tell we were looking forward to a few nights without the lord and lady of the house. Elena made sure to treat them as well.

“Please eat what you would like, nothing should go to waste and you should enjoy the spoils of the household as well.”

The cook seemed skeptical but nodded and thanked her, and I imagined she might’ve already been planning to eat well while we were gone. This new generosity from Luna Elena was confusing but a welcome change from her aloofness before.

“And a few bottles of wine could go missing,” she said, throwing it over her shoulder as she walked away, “and I’m sure I wouldn’t notice.”

A young maid actually gasped and then clamped her mouth shut, mortified. This brought out a laugh in Elena as she left the room.

“Thank you, Alpha,” the cook said with a small bow of her head.

“Thank the Luna,” I corrected, “she is the better half, it would seem.”

We were a caravan of two vehicles. Elena and I were in a smaller car with two Betas in the front, and an SUV tailed us with three others. I had a team check our route for stopping points and areas to be wary of.

“And if anyone has any ideas about harming the Alpha of Waning Moon on the road,” I told my team, “let hell rain down on them.”

Elena was quiet as we began the journey, a mystery to me even though I’d known her for years. Maybe it was part of this change, or maybe I never knew her before and this was the true Elena. She wouldn’t tell me which it was, so I just had to keep trying.

“What are you thinking about?”

She looked at me, almost like she wondered if I was addressing some invisible person in the back of the car with us.

“Nothing,” she said with a shrug. “It’s nice to get away.”

“It is,” I said, “I think we deserve to take a break, together.”

Her hand rested on the seat between us, and I put mine on top of hers. She looked at it then looked back out the window, but didn’t try to pull away.

“I really do hope this can be a fresh start for us,” I told her, giving her fingers a gentle squeeze. Her hand was cool, her fingernails smooth and almost pearlescent with her white skin underneath. I had never really noticed it before.

“Sure,” she said, looking out the window.

“Do you want that?”

Now she looked at me, letting out a sigh as she turned.

“I don’t really know what I want, to be honest,” her voice steady, unsentimental. “I have so many different expectations for how my life might turn out, and none of them have been met. So maybe now I shouldn’t have any.”

“That’s a bit morbid, isn’t it?”

Her eyes narrowed. “Is it?”

I wasn’t sure if that was rhetorical, so I changed the subject.

“The moon will be full in a few days,” I said, sounding like I thought I invented it. “We could stay out there, in the mountains. It’s been so long since I’ve seen your wolf.”

She stared at me with an odd curl at the side of her mouth. Not quite a smirk, it looked like she was remembering that she knew something that I didn’t. It was a face I was seeing too often these days. It drove me wild, in more ways than one.

“What? What is it?” I asked, growing uncomfortable under her silent stare. Her eyes were rust-colored in the morning light. “Why do you always look at me like that?”

Her face went slack and neutral in a second. “Like what?”

“Like…you’re suddenly in on some joke about me, or something like I have something in my teeth.”

She blink her long white lashes. “I would tell you if you had something in your teeth,” she said naturally.”

“Thank you, but—“

“And I have no interest in making fun of you,” she continued, “it brings me no pleasure to bring others down.”

“No, no pleasure…”

My repetition of that word produced a spark in both of us, and I could see she was slightly startled by it. Her eyes met mine, and she took a breath that was visible in her chest. I couldn’t help it when my eyes dropped to watch that breath, to see the tops of her breast swell against the neckline of her shirt.

It was a look that lasted for a hair of a second, but when I looked back up she was watching me intently. Her cheeks were flushed, but her expression walked the line between anger and desire.

“Elena…” I let my hand travel up her arm, my touch light.

She didn’t stop me, so I caressed the back of her elbow, her tricep, around her back and over her shoulder. I brushed her hair off her shoulder, allowing me to see her neck. Her pulse was quick under her skin, and I placed the back of my fingers against it.

Her eyes closed softly, her body reacting to my touch. I wanted her so badly, and I thought that this trip meant I could have her again.

“I’ve missed you.”

Her eyes opened. “I know.”

That was all she offered me, until she slowly took my hand from her neck and placed it back on the seat between us. I would have to accept it as a step in the right direction.

“I’m glad we’ll be getting away from the media too,” I said, moving on to practical things. “It seems the area is pretty remote, maybe they won’t even know about us.”

I practically saw all the hair on her body raise up off her skin.

“What about us?”

“Well,” I started slowly, “I’m hoping they don’t recognize us, well you, from the photo, that’s all. I think it would be nice not to have to deal with it for a few days, don’t you?”

She didn’t need to tell me that I had said the wrong thing, but she chose to anyway.

“Even though that photo was proven to be falsely used, a fraud,” she said with spite, “you are still worried about your reputation? Somehow I am still the one who is shamed?”

“No!” I growled, wondering how much our voices were carrying to the front seat. “Elena, I don’t want people to associate you with him.”

This changed something for her, a softening around her eyes.

“I know nothing happened with Jaxon, and I know that the press is not through attacking your character,” I was getting heated now. I couldn’t believe she still thought I wouldn’t fight for her. “And if he ever did try anything with you, I would kill him.”

She rolled her eyes. “You men and your empty threats of honorable murder.”

“Not empty, Elena,” I put my hand on her wrist, not hard but firm. “If you ever tried to leave me for him, I would rip out his throat.”

Her mouth opened, alarmed but satisfied in my valor.

“Of course, our being together in the public eye will do wonders for my political campaign,” I went on, leading with honesty, “but I want you there because by my side I feel like a complete person. I need you and I want you to be by my side.”

“You said the same things to my sister,” she said, dropping her eyes. I wondered if she was hiding tears.

“No, I didn’t.”

She looked up again, not totally believing. As I predicted her eyes were glassy.

“Natalie and I were in love, yes, I won’t deny that,” I clarified, “but it was youthful, naive. Now I feel…I feel like you make me stronger, and our Pack more united.”

“And you don’t think Natalie would have matured into a perfect Luna?” Her question was so earnest. “Or if she hadn’t left, would you still want her?”

“Left? Elena, she died.”

“But would you?”

“No! How can you ask me that?”

She looked disappointed, not buying my words. Then she turned to look out the window again.

“I guess we’ll find out.”

My head snapped to attention. “What do you mean?”

She turned back to me. “I lied to you.”

“What?”

“About where we are going.”

“Where is that?”

“We are going to find Natalie.”