Chapter 77

What did he just say?

No. Surely, I’d heard him wrong...

My entire body froze on the spot, my mind went blank, as I openly gaped at James. I was stunned beyond words. I couldn’t even find the words to piece together a proper sentence.

Suddenly, the look on James’ face started to shift into a look of pure shock as though he just realized what he’d said.

My lips parted in complete disbelief as I continued to stare at the man in fear. No. It couldn’t be true. How could someone like me be matched with someone like James? It didn’t make any sense.

Even after everything the two of us have been through together, there was no mistaking that we were ultimately worlds apart and were never actually meant to be paired together. It was all just part of a contract. That was the foundation of our relationship. Nothing more.

It wasn’t not love and it sure as hell wasn’t based on any true soul-bond connection. It was an agreement, a mutually beneficial agreement and that was all.

I suddenly felt lightheaded. I rolled back on the heels of my feet while my mind slipped into a solid state of denial.

I shook my head. “No.”

“Yes.” James nodded.

“No. I don’t believe you.”

“It’s true,” he affirmed.

“No.”

“Mia!” he growled with burnt-out exhaustion.

My anger started to rise to a level I never experienced. “NO! I don’t believe you!” I shouted back.

“Why not?” he asks breathlessly.

“Because any self-respecting—halfway decent person would never keep something that detrimental from their actual mate. Because if it were really true, I would have thought that you would have had the decency to tell me as soon as you found that out,” I explained.

It was why I had such a hard time believing him. It couldn’t have been true. James was not the kind of person to be purposely vindictive and keep something like this hidden away.

‘Mia, you’re forgetting that this is also the same man that kept you on a ridiculous tight-knit schedule as a means to control every moment of your life,’ I thought to myself.

With that unsettling thought bouncing around in my head, I crossed my arms over my chest and scowled.

“When did you figure this out then?” I asked bitterly. Perhaps, this was a new development that he came to realize and was just having a difficult time finding a way to tell, given all that had been going on.

I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. Because, part of me was still desperate to think there was a reasonable, decent explanation behind all of it.

James kept his eyes locked on the ground as he spoke.

“...The night you found Peter Miller out with another woman. It was when you first kissed me that I knew you were my mate.”

My jaw went slack. “You...Oh my God! That was months ago!”

He buried his face in his hands and sighed. “I know, I should have told you the night I discovered it myself, it’s just...”

I narrowed my eyes. “It’s just what?” The idea slowly dawns on me. The pain that had been surrounding my heart flooded throughout the rest of my body. “Oh...I get it...You didn’t tell me because, obviously, you were embarrassed by the fact. That’s it, isn’t it?”

This time, James was the one who glared back at me with anger in his eyes. “That’s not true and you know it.”

“Thanks to you, I don’t know what to believe.”

His voice filled with desperation. “Can you at least believe me when I tell you that I love you?” he asked.

“No. In fact, I think that’s the furthest thing I could ever believe,” I told him.

Tears started to gather in the corners of my eyes and I could see that my doubt was truly affecting James as well.

“You know that my wolf is dormant. You know that I don’t have the ability to tell if I’ve come across my mate or not. It was you who's always had the advantage! You have every opportunity to tell me these things,” I explained angrily. “And, yet, you kept them to yourself for reasons I will never understand. All that tells me is that you were never accepting of any of it since the beginning.”

“But I told you that I love you—”

“In the middle of a fucking press conference! When every news outlet was watching us and prying for their next story...Why couldn’t you have said it any other time, in private, when it was just us?”

A long pause went by. Neither James nor I could stand to look at the other.

“I think you should go.”

“How can I make you believe me?”

I shook my head in defeat and rolled my shoulders back. “I don’t know. Hell, I don’t even know where to go from here.”

“Why don’t we go home and talk everything out? Perhaps, then it may help you come to accept and see things for what they are.”

I struggled to offer a small smile. “I’m not the one who’s been struggling to accept anything. You’re the one who refused to tell me everything that’s been going on. James, you’re the one that needs to take some time for yourself to figure out what it is that you want. Because I don’t believe that it’s me.”

It was then that I closed the door on James for a second time that same day. The moment the door clicked shut, I allowed myself to break down. All the tears I’d been struggling to hold back came rushing down my cheeks. My throat grew sore and strained from the pain that sorted through my heart.

‘How could he have done something like this to me?’ I asked myself. ‘If it were really true, why did he keep it a secret?’

My relationship with James felt as good as done. Before I was filled with uncertainty...Now, there was nothing but heartbreak.