Chapter 23

I didn’t need to turn my head to know that James was glaring at me. I could feel the intense heat from his gaze searing right through me. It took everything inside of me not to turn and look at him.

Hadn’t I been humiliated enough? I was truly hoping that my confession of my personal feelings toward James would have been enough to suffice. But I could tell from the ravenous expressions on these reporters was proof of how wrong I was.

The room flared up with questions and startling remarks.

“Mrs. Derek! Can you elaborate on that?”

“Mrs. Derek, has there ever been anyone else that you’ve ever loved this deeply?”

“What else can you tell us about your childhood?”

“Were you bullied relentlessly? If so, why?”

“What does your family make of this sudden match? Can you tell us anything about their exact response?”

Jesus Christ, it felt like the room was spinning. I quickly shot up from my seat, causing the crows to once again fall silent.

“No further questions,” I said.

I left the platform and made a direct B-line for the main doors. Only when I made it out into the hallway did I finally feel like I could breathe. Unfortunately, I was attacked by half a dose of other emotions that were all fighting for first place.

Anger. Shame. Disgust. Embarrassment. Revulsion. Sadness.

Good God. My whole body was vibrating from the ongoing shocks that pulsed through me. It was all just too much to bear all at once.

“Mia...” I heard James call out from behind me.

He was truly the last person I wanted to deal with.

‘What the hell could he possibly want now?’ I asked myself angrily. ‘Haven’t I done enough for him?’

I’d given my life over to the insane schedule he’d designed for me. I never, not once, tried to break away from it or refused to go along with anything. I’ve done everything that was expected of me, yet I felt that I would never be enough because of my background.

Monica’s harsh, unfeeling words echoed through my head. ‘A stone, no matter how polished, will never become a diamond...She will never compare to my sister!’

And if that weren’t enough, what that one reporter had commented before, about me somewhat resembling Evelyn—especially because of the clothes I was wearing, felt like the final nail in the coffin.

It left such an awful taste in my mouth and a terrible ache in my chest. Clearly, James was trying to make me into something that I wasn't.

Was that what everything had been about this whole time? Was he merely trying to replace the wife he lost, by trying to control every part of my life?

I struggled to take in a few extra beats before finding the courage to turn around.

“I’m going back to the car,” I told him firmly. “Stay here if you need to, I don’t care.”

James silently shook his head and the two of us quietly made it out to the car. The ride back to the house was kept entirely in silence. I wasn’t sure if that was a blessing or another misfortune.

As soon as we got back, Lily rushed to greet us with a jovial smile and unbridled excitement.

“Oh, my...You’re back so early,” she started. “I was fairly certain that the two of you would be away for a good part of the day.”

“Wasn’t feeling well,” I muttered under my breath.

Lily’s eyes flickered between James and me, no doubt sensing the strained emotions that were clouding around us. James cleared his throat and directed his attention to his headmaid.

“Lily, would you please inform the cooks to prepare something light for lunch? Mia and I will be in the dining room shortly—”

“No,” I intervened. “I do not wish to be disturbed for the rest of the day. Like I said, I’m not feeling well and I really need to be alone right now.”

The look on James’ face was a clear indication that my request was about to be challenged. Little did he know that I was in no mood to argue.

“Mia—”

“I want to be alone, James,” I stated harshly.

My heart slammed painfully against my rib cage as small tears started to speckle in the corners of my eyes. For the love of God. Haven’t I endured enough for one day?

“I need to be alone. Okay? All I want to do now is find a way to relax,” I told him.

“Oh! How about I have one of the maids run you a bath?” Lily suggested kindly.

“Thank you, Lily. That won’t be necessary. I’m sure I can manage on my own.”

James drew his brows together. “For God’s sake, Mia. Why won’t you just let the staff do their job?”

“I am not incapable of doing things myself!” I fired back. “You forget that before all of this, I was in charge of my own life and I know how to live independently.”

“You’re being stubborn, stop it,” he demanded roughly.

“Whatever.” I ignored him for the sake of preserving what energy I had left and turned to head toward the bedroom.

“Damnit, Mia stop!” James ordered. “This conversation isn’t over.”

“Yes, it is. Now, kindly leave me to my solitude.”

James threw his hand out, causing the door to slam shut before I could slip inside.

“You are going to tell me what is wrong and then I’m going to find a way to fix the problem,” he said sternly.

“This isn’t something that you or anyone can fix.” A silent pause went by. “Monica was right, wasn’t she? I’ll never be good enough for you or your family given the way I naturally am.”

James sounded shocked and offended. “What? No. What are you talking about?”

“Your excessive and obsessive way of making me adhere to that psychotic schedule. You’ve done nothing but stress and push me to follow everything that’s on it. And I have! But for what?”

I gently shook my head, dreading the feeling of a harsh headache coming on.

“I didn’t know who Evelyn was. But what I do know is that I don’t have what it takes to fill her shoes. If what you’re looking for is a new Evelyn then I‘m telling you right now that you’ve chosen the wrong woman,” I told him weakly.

James was dumbfounded, the man was speechless. He didn’t say a single word nor did he try to stop me from opening the bedroom door once more.

Without another word, I stepped inside and closed the door in his face.