Chapter 21

Chiara

My heart thunders in my chest as I see Vedant run past me. I shrink further into my seat, trying to make myself as small as possible. I glance nervously at the purple hat sitting beside me before grabbing it and shoving it into my bag.

Vedant has no reason to think that Iris and I are the same person, but something in my gut is screaming at me not to let him see me. I wrack my brain as I think of something to do. The Felix I know, the Vedant, won’t give up until he finds what he’s looking for.

I pull out my phone and send off a quick text, hoping it will be enough to discourage Vedant’s search.

Iris: We shouldn’t try to see each other in the future.

I hold my breath as Vedant begins to turn back in my direction. I can’t let him see me here now. What if he connects the dots.

Before Vedant can complete the movement, he stills, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out his phone. His face falls as he reads the text on the screen, and a pang of guilt shoots through me. I shake it off knowing that I did what I had to.

Every muscle in my body tenses as I wait to see what he will do next. His eyes scan the screen of his phone one more time before he pockets the device and moves back toward the stage.

I release the breath I had been holding. I wait until he is a few rows down and then I take my opportunity to escape, trying not to draw too much attention as I squeeze through the crowded gym.

I get a few questioning looks as I make my through the packed gym, but no one stops me as I pass. No one from my pack would ever suspect me of being the woman Vedant is so desperate to meet, and those from other packs are, mercilessly, don’t seem to care that a random girl picked this exact moment to leave.

I finally make it to the door and breathe a sigh of relief. I don’t know why, but every instinct is telling me if Vedant had seen me in the gym, he would have figured out that I am Iris.

I start the long walk back home, and as I do, the reality of what happened hits me. Vedant and Felix are the same person. My suspicions had been correct. The sleeve, the similarities in their voices, Vedant’s phone chiming outside of the locker that day when I texted Felix; none of it had been a coincidence.

I make the way through the front door of the small house the pack had provided, slamming it behind me. They are the same person. I don’t bother resisting as tears begin to stain my cheeks.

The person I had been confiding in, who said I could leave my pack for his, was the same person who had vowed to make my life a living hell. My mind reels as I try to compare the sweet and empathetic nature of Felix with the person Vedant had become since his brother’s death.

I think about the person Vedant had been before, when we had still been inseparable. I suppose that somewhere that person was still a part of Vedant, even if he was only willing to be that guy through an online persona.

I stand and make my way to my room, collapsing face first on to the bed. I groan. None of it matters.

I lost Vedant’s friendship once and I will have to do it again. Felix had been a lifeline for me in the aftermath of the rogue attack and Owen’s death, but now that I know who he really is, I know that I have to let him go.

There’s a buzz from beside me and I look down to see Felix’s name on the screen. I ignore it. A clean break will be easier.

I turn and stare at the ceiling. Without Felix, Lynn is my only friend in the world, and even she is willing to go along with my isolation if it means an easier time for her. Felix is the only one who had shown that he would be there for me no matter what, or so I thought.

All my dreams of running away to find him, of securing Vedant’s rejection and asking Felix to accept me as my mate have just gone down the drain. My prince charming has turned out to also be the villain, one of them at least. There will be no fairytale ending for me.

My phone buzzes again and I nearly throw it across the room. I know that Felix, Vedant, must want some kind of explanation, but I can’t give that to him. Anything I would say would be too confusing, or worse, give my identity away.

He will just have to carry on never knowing why Iris had never come forward at the competition, or why she never messaged him again. Another pang of guilt rips through me and I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block everything out.

Vedant had never shown me any sympathy, why should I feel any for him? I think about how gentle he had been as Felix. Was it all an act?

How could someone who was capable of such kindness also be capable of such cruelty? A vision of myself alone in the punishment room, cold and hungry, flashes behind my eyes. He had ordered that punishment.

I think of how he stood by time and time again as Alice and her friends tormented me. Alice had strung me up and beaten me, and while he hadn’t known the whole truth, he knew that something was wrong. I could see it in his eyes.

He still left me alone in the hospital wing, with her waiting just outside. I can’t ever imagine Felix allowing those things to happen, even to someone he didn’t care for, even to someone he hated.

I try to reconcile my image of them both in my head, but it just makes it ache. Felix and Vedant are the same person but thinking of them that way felt impossible.

There’s more buzzing from beside me, this time three in a row. I sigh and pick up my phone, tapping into the messages.

Felix: Where are you?

Felix: What do you mean that we shouldn’t see each other anymore? We’ve waited to meet for so long. What’s wrong?

Felix: Iris, please answer. I’m sorry if I embarrassed you at the competition today, I just wanted everyone to know that you are the one I choose. I didn’t think about how you’d feel about the public display,

Felix: Please, just talk to me.

Felix: I don’t know what’s going on, but I know we can work it out, but you need to speak to me.

I read and then reread the messages, my heart aching. I wish what he said was true, but no amount of talking through it would be able to save us now. Another message comes through.

Felix: Please Iris. I love you.

I close my eyes for a second, willing my tears to stop. There is nothing he can say to make this better.

My hands shake as I click on his name. I read through the options there until I find the one I need. I hesitate for a moment, my finger hovering over the screen, but I take a deep breath and press it. Block contact.