Chapter 34

Sebastian

Evelyn’s clear misery fuels me to do everything I can to talk to—or even find—Ava before Thanksgiving break. Even though she never asked for my help, I’m not just going to sit around and wait for Ava to take her sweet time.

Ignoring my texts is one thing. Going out of her way to hide from the both of us is a whole different game, and I’m sick of it.

I’ve gone everywhere I know she spends her time. I’ve found her friends in the bars and classmates in the coffee shop. I’ve waited outside the cheer locker room several days in a row but somehow always miss Ava.

Now it’s not a desire to find her. It’s truly personal.

I don’t know how she’s doing this, but this ends today.

It takes a bit of sleuthing and bribes, but I get the class Ava has this afternoon, and I head over to the building.

Thankfully, I’ve given up a long time ago caring about what these people think of me. While I still worry for Evelyn’s sake that people will discover our secret, I’ve also learned that no one’s going to say a bad word about me.

That includes the students and the faculty.

I pull open the door to the lecture hall that Ava is currently attending after the class has been going for fifteen minutes. I wanted to make sure there was no way I’d miss her this time.

I enter the room, the professor teaching becoming distracted by my interruption.

“Sorry, can I help you?” She asks with a scratch of her head.

“So sorry to interrupt Professor Mass, but I need Ava Remington?”

My eyes flick over to the room of over a hundred students, landing on Ava and her blonde hair, eyebrows raised, and mouth wide open.

“I don’t think I quite understand,” Mass replies.

“Miss Remington, she’s a student in this class. I’m sorry to be the one to break it to you, Ava, but there’s been a family emergency, and I was sent to collect you. Come on, we have to get going!”

“Oh, my goodness, of course, Mr. Cain,” Mass gasps, covering her mouth. “Miss Remington, go quickly now!”

Ava narrows her eyes from her spot. “I’m sure that everything can wait another thirty minutes for me to finish gathering my notes?”

“I’m afraid not,” I lie, shaking my head. “Things are already going from bad to worse.”

“It’s alright, dear, truly. There’s nothing you’ll miss that will be of dire importance. Send me an email tonight about the notes, and I’ll get them to you.”

“Professor, really now—” Ava tries.

But I hold up a hand to stop her from going any further. “Ava, we have to leave now.”

Ava looks from Mass to me and back to Mass again. Realizing she’s run out of options and has nowhere to hide from me, Ava rolls her eyes as she quickly gathers her things.

I nod in the direction of Professor Mass, thanking her for understanding as Ava stomps past me out the door. I nod my head to the room and follow after my friend.

We don’t even make it ten feet from the classroom before Ava lays into me.

“You had no right to do that,” she chastises.

I roll my eyes, annoyed with this woman as it is. “I don’t particularly care if your professor knows I was lying. I need to talk to you.”

She lets out one single bark of a laugh. “I have nothing to talk to you about, Sebastian.”

“You’re damn right you don’t! You’re not going to act as if you don’t know a single thing.” I cross my arms, ready for whatever she thinks she can throw my way.

“Who says I do? Clearly, I know nothing. You let me befriend her under the guise of your step-sister, and instead, you’re fucking her. Which, by the way, is fucking vile!”

I roll my eyes once again and clarify, “No, we’ve only slept together one time, and that was the beginning before we even knew anything about one another.”

She groans. “What?”

“Her shit boyfriend cheated on her, and I’d already told her to come find me if she wanted to try something new,” I explain, exasperated. “She initially turned me down so when she came back, it was a surprise.”

“So, what, you fucked her before you knew her name?”

“I met her on our birthday. The party I threw in Hawaii. I didn’t meet her as my new stepsister until after we’d slept together.”

She shakes her head. “So, what then, Sebastian? You still should have stopped what you were doing the moment you realized who you would be to one another!”

“Trust me, Evelyn has tried to deny her feelings for me for a long time.”

“Yet I walked in on the two of you eating each other’s faces! You’re bonded by your parents’ marriage; what did you think was going to happen?”

Now I’m the one who’s laughing at the stupidity of the situation. “Do you think any of that matters, Ava? We’re not blood! We’re not family!”

I point my finger past Ava as if the people I speak of stand behind her. “Her mom married Gregory, a man that I’m not even related to. Out of everyone I know, you’re the only one who knows the truth about that man.”

“Do I? Because clearly, you hold a myriad of secrets, Sebastian Cain.”

“The only secret is that I keep having to lie to everyone around me that I don’t fucking care about Evelyn when I do. Why are you making her feel worse when she’s already stressed out about hurting everyone else?”

Ava scoffs at this, but I continue to push.

“Evelyn has denied me repeatedly. Months of games between the two of us, but I continue to keep score. If you believe I’m just going to sit back and let her walk away from this, you’re wrong.”

“You can have any damn girl that you want! You’re Sebastian fucking Cain!”

“And she’s the only one that matters!”

My body feels like it’s on the verge of bursting into flames as I take two steps closer to my friend, wanting her to hear what I’m saying.

“I have never felt like this before, Ava. Never. Everything with Evelyn is fucking different, and that’s why I won’t stop chasing her; stop fighting for her.”

I look deep into light blue eyes that seem filled with an emotion I can’t name. It’s odd, seeing as I’ve known Ava for so long that I thought I could meticulously log every expression she’s ever given me.

“I’ll be goddamned if I hurt Evelyn, but my intention wasn’t to hurt you or anyone else in this. You can’t choose who you care for, and you know that. Anyone I give a shit about was never meant to become caught in the crossfire.”

“What about your roommate?” Ava mutters, which is fair, since that piece of shit has been smart enough to avoid me altogether.

“He can rot in hell, but you are not William,” I remind her.

“You’re right, and I’m not your filthy mess of a friend who cares more about boning some chick than a friendship.”

Is she relenting, or is she just getting ready for another kick to the nuts?

I push myself even closer, but Ava steps back a few times, and I know that the progress I thought I was making was never truly there.

“Ava, you know me,” I insist. “Don’t act like I’m just some stranger to you.”

“I’m not ready to forgive either of you,” she states plainly.

I roll my head back, uncrossing my arms and throwing them up in the air. “And when will you be ready then?”

She shrugs. “I don’t have to know or even tell you the answer to that, Sebastian.”

I groan loudly. “Ava!”

“No!” She snaps back. “Stop expecting me to fall to my knees to do anything for your praise because I don’t fucking care how you feel about me. You both did a disgusting, absolutely deplorable thing in hiding this from everyone. Now you’re going to feel what’s it like to be on the other side of that.”

It’s not that Ava’s never stood up to me—because she’s her own person who knows how to hold her own—but it’s difficult to hear her anger and disgust with every word she breathes.

For the first time, I don’t know if I can fix this thing between us.

“You need to leave me be. I need time to figure out how I’m feeling, and right now, this isn’t something I’m ready to deal with. You need to get that through your head.”

Ava hikes her backpack up her shoulder and turns away from me, striding toward the building’s exit.

“Have a happy Thanksgiving under one roof, Sebastian.”

As I watch her go, I let out a low groan and fall back against the wall behind me.

All I wanted was to have this solved before Evelyn and I returned to Gregory and Madelyn’s.

And instead, I may have just made things much worse. Once again, I’ve failed Evelyn.