Craving The Beast I Hate

Vida’s POV

"Vida... wake up... you've to..." I hear voices in my head, voices I couldn't picture who they belong to. "Now...." It was commanding and my eyes snapped open. I woke up to my hands brushing my hair out of my face, looking up I saw Meredith leaning on the wall of my room. I stare back wondering the reason he is here and how I ended up here. The last thing I remember I was with Akira, and she was battling for her life. Meredith's eyes were crowded with sadness, and I could tell he had been crying, his eyes all puffy and bloodshot.

I sit upright wondering what must have happened to Akira, Fear envelopes me, as many thoughts invade my head, hoping Akira is alright. His eyes snapped to me suddenly, probably because of my movement, I saw his lips curve into a smile, and in a second they were gone, his serious expression got me worried as well. But I am used to Meredith, his mood swings are worse than a pregnant woman in her first trimester.

My eyes roved the room, it's painted white, I knew I was in the hospital, with not just the painting but the antiseptic invading my nostrils, nothing was attached to me. I try to force my head to remember things that happened in the last minutes, was it minutes or hours or probably days because I have no clue of what is going on but the more I try the more it ended up with Akira calling me that something terrible was happening to Wolfie and she almost at the point of dying, nothing is adding to that.

"What is going on?" I asked Meredith before my eyes snapped to the door, and Austin was standing there all this time. But that wasn't all I was worried about, my throat was dry, the burning sensations were coming from my tummy and I felt trapped in the body of another, I remember nothing, "where is..."

"We need to get the rejection done," my eyes snapped to the cold voice of Meredith, who had pulled away from the wall he was leaning lazily on, a few minutes ago, and his hand slipped into his pocket, while his hair was tousled, making him look more handsome. Meredith had always been a handsome man with a bit of temper and one who doesn't look out for people's feelings. He says things he wants, without thinking of the other person's feelings. Akira said he is a nice man but he has never shown me that part, probably because he doesn't like me. I stared at him confused, while Austin shook his head. Meredith took a step but didn't attempt to come anywhere near my bed, "I Meredith Ramsey, beta of..."

"Wait, what is going on?" I ask my voice tremble, as I swing my legs from the bed, panic hit me, I don't understand a single thing, I press my fingers on my temple, fighting to remember what happened to me and how I ended up here, shutting my eyes if I could remember anything just a flash of last night filtered through my foggy mind, running to that cabin, Akira's terrifying scream, pain in her eyes. Then nothing. A blank space swallowed the rest, "Why can't I remember anything, and what is the man talking about?" My fingers flew to my lips, while my eyes widened staring at him as realization hit me. "What do you mean by rejection? Are you my..." I shake my head, I don't think I am his mate, I don't feel any fucking thing for him, fine, he is handsome but I am not attracted to him, I might be a human but I know everything about wolves and the bond. That mate Bond is something no one can deny but how the heck am I not feeling anything for him?

No spark

No pull

No longing.

"I want this bond broken, so you will have to accept my rejection," his voice was cold...too cold for comfort. I turned my head, startled, and my heart nearly froze, as his voice pulled me from my thoughts. His expression was unreadable.

"I don't know what you are talking about, so let me be,"

He looked at me like I was a mistake and the worst nightmare of his life.

My eyes snapped to Austin. I had seen him once at the office, and we had a little conversation but I was okay with him. He seemed nice, unlike this cold man. Before I could even ask what happened to my friend Akira, his next words struck me harder than any blow.

“I, Meredith Ramsey, beta of the Gold Moon Pack, reject you, Vida McCarthy, as my mate.”

My mouth fell open, as he took the words again, this time completely, the part that had left me marveled.

What?

Mate?

My heart didn’t flutter, nothing stirs in me. There was no pull, no warmth, nothing. Not even a whisper of a bond. My inner self was silent...oddly silent.

Yes, I am human but my friend was human too, she told me she felt the bond between her and Wolfie, she was head over heel for him right from the moment she set eyes on him, she wanted him and when Wolfie forced her to accept the rejection, she felt a sharp pain before Wolfie take all the pains.

I blinked at him, stunned. “I don’t even feel the bond…” his eyes flash pain and then he masks it again, having that stoic expression.

“I don’t care what you feel. It exists. But I don’t want it.” His tone was clipped, impatient.

I stared at him, something in my chest twisting not from heartbreak, but confusion. The idea of being someone’s mate had never felt real to me, and now, being rejected by someone I didn't even feel a connection to… it felt surreal.

Without thinking, I shrugged my shoulders and answered plainly. “Then I accept.”

His eyes narrowed, like he hadn’t expected me to agree so quickly. But I didn’t care. My thoughts were already drifting to Akira and not his nonsensical drama of asking for rejection when there is no bond.

“Meredith,” I said quickly, before he could turn away, while my eyes darted from him to Austin. “Akira...my friend... your Luna, she was with me last night. Is she okay? And the alpha, are they fine?”

He didn’t answer. A flicker of something, spread across his eyes, was that regret? I asked as it crossed his face, but he masked it too fast again.

"What an asshole." I mouthed, when he tilted his head to me, I forced a smile.

“What happened to her? Where is she?”

Again, silence.

Panic surged. As I pushed through him and rushed to Austin who was standing there looking pale and confused, his gaze was on Meredith, looking at him like he had lost his mind. “What happened to her?” I repeated, louder this time. “Tell me!”

Meredith walked passed us, jaw tight. “You should focus on yourself instead of being stupid thinking of another”

I ignore him, pushing off Austin, my legs wobbling as I struggle to pass him. “I need to see her...”

“Vida.” The voice that interrupted wasn’t Austin's or Meredith's, A nurse rushed into the room, looking flustered and pale. Her hands trembled as she held a folded piece of clothing, a blood-stained top. I recognized it instantly.

It was Akira’s.

My chest tightened, vision blurring. “Where is she?” I demanded again, my voice shaking.

The nurse opened her mouth, but before she could speak, a shrill alarm blared across the hospital. Red lights flashed. A pack-wide emergency.

My heart raced.

Then the intercom crackled to life.

“All staff to the lower wing. Subject is awake. I repeat... Subject is awake.”

I turned to the nurse. “What subject?”

The nurse didn’t answer.

But Meredith did. His eyes locked with mine and this time, his voice trembled with something unfamiliar.

“You weren’t supposed to survive last night, you should be grateful and stay away from Akira.”