Chapter 67

Nicholas

“I need to replace this damn couch,” I grumbled.

I shifted on the couch in my study, the old leather and shitty springs creaking beneath my weight as I attempted to stretch out. It was a useless effort, and the light of the moon shining through the sheer curtains felt blinding, even when I draped my arm over my eyes.

To make matters worse, it was freezing in here; the fire in the corner had long since died out, but I hadn’t bothered to light it again.

But despite the cold, the frustration bubbling beneath my skin felt unbearably hot.

I could feel it crawling up my spine, wrapping around my ribs and settling deep in my chest like fire spreading through me. It hadn’t left me since earlier today. Since I had found her with him.

Noah.

The memory of his hand brushing against hers, her slender arms wrapped around his neck and his face buried in her hair, made something sharp twist in my gut. I grit my teeth, trying to shove it aside, but it simply wouldn’t go away.

Not to mention the way she had somehow, despite having no wolf of her own, used the mate bond to desperately pull me back into the kitchen.

I didn’t know how the hell she did that with no wolf of her own. Nor did I know why.

Was it revenge after the way I’d used the bond to my advantage yesterday? Desperation? Something else?

After that, she had told me that she had rejected him. She didn’t have to, but she did.

I shouldn’t have cared. It really shouldn’t have mattered.

If he was her fated mate, it wasn’t like I could stop it. I didn’t even want to try.

I had seen firsthand the kind of damage the fated mate bond could cause. The pain my piece of shit father had wrought upon my mother, all for the sake of his ‘fated mate bond’ to Isabella.

Frankly, I called it bullshit, but he had called it fate—the cosmic bond that no wolf could fully ignore, as if that made everything better. As if that justified breaking my poor mother apart piece by piece until there was nothing left but an empty husk of her former self.

I swore I would never be like him, nor would I let anything like that ever happen to me. And I wouldn’t. If Kayla was meant to be with Noah, then I would happily step aside to let them be together.

So why the hell did I feel so damn relieved when she told me she had turned him down?

I rubbed the heel of my hand against my chest, like that would somehow soothe the ache settling there. It didn’t, of course.

I just kept picturing the way Noah looked at her. The way he had told her that he thought she was his fated mate, the way he’d brought up my mother as if that would help in some way.

And I… I had nearly hit him for it. But I don’t think that I hit him because he’d brought up my mother. I think I did it because of Kayla.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I let out a long breath and sat up, scrubbing a hand through my hair before getting to my feet. Maybe some water would help. Or maybe I just needed an excuse to move off of this uncomfortable couch.

The floorboards creaked quietly beneath my bare feet as I stepped out into the hall, the dim glow from the moonlight filtering in through the windows. The house was quiet, far too quiet for my racing mind. I liked it much better when there were voices and music and drinks to dull the bad thoughts.

As I passed my bedroom, I paused. The door was cracked open.

My breath hitched when I saw Kayla laying there.

She was curled up beneath the blankets, tucked into the center of the bed. Her hair was fanned out across the pillow, red strands catching the silver light pouring in from the window. But she looked anything but peaceful. One hand gripped the edge of the pillow, knuckles turning white, and her brows were furrowed in her sleep. And most of all…

Tears were staining her cheeks.

The moment I saw that dampness on her skin, I stepped inside without thinking. I should have walked away, should have let her be, but the sight of her trembling in her sleep made something tighten in my chest.

She was dreaming. A nightmare, maybe.

Quietly, I crossed the room and sank onto the edge of the bed before I could think better of it. I was careful not to jostle her as I reached out and brushed my fingers lightly over her shoulder.

The tension in her body melted almost instantly beneath my touch. Her grip on the pillow slackened, and her breathing evened out as she eased back into a peaceful slumber.

I stayed like that for a long moment, watching the steady rise and fall of her chest. My hand lingered a second longer than it should have before I forced myself to pull away.

I remembered this feeling, this connection. When she’d been sick with that fever, she had insisted on me staying by her side. Not that she needed to; I’d willingly chosen to stay with her, because frankly, I was worried about her.

But as I’d held her hand, the fever had subsided and she had healed far more quickly than she should have. Jade told me it was the mate bond at work, and I believed her.

After that, I told myself that I had only stayed by her side during that whole ordeal because it had helped her heal. That the reason I held her hand was purely practical. The bond had accelerated her recovery.

But even now, as I sat there with the memory gnawing at the edges of my mind, I knew that wasn’t the whole truth.

I hadn’t let go because I didn’t want to.

And that night in the cave, when I had curled my wolf form around her and kept her warm… That had nothing to do with the bond.

Now she was at risk of being taken away by the last person I ever suspected: my best friend.

My fingers curled into the blanket beneath me at that thought, and I swallowed hard, trying to tamp down the possessive growl threatening to slip out.

It wasn’t rational. I knew that.

But it didn’t matter.

I wanted her. All of her.

And I hated it. Hated the way she made me feel like I was coming apart at the seams. Like I was someone else entirely when she was around.

I’d spent years building this version of myself. The playboy who didn’t care, who could take whatever he wanted and walk away without a second thought. But Kayla was unraveling all of it piece by piece, pulling apart the threads I’d tied so tightly around myself to keep others out in the short span of a month.

And the worst part? I wasn’t even sure if I wanted her to stop.

Her breath hitched softly in her sleep, and I tensed, waiting to see if she would wake. But she didn’t. She only shifted closer, as if drawn to the warmth radiating from me.

I knew I should leave.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I sat there in the silence of the room, listening to the quiet rhythm of her breathing, and wondered how the hell I was supposed to keep pretending that this didn’t mean anything.

Because the truth was painfully clear now.

Kayla wasn’t just a part of this arrangement anymore. She wasn’t just a chosen Luna to help me get what I wanted.

She was becoming a part of me, somehow, despite my best efforts to keep it from happening.

And I hated how vulnerable that made me feel.