Chapter 115

Kayla

Nicholas was still asleep beside me when I woke the next morning.

My eyes fluttered open, squinting against the harsh sunlight streaming in through the windows, and my breath caught as I looked over and saw him laying there. He was on the opposite side of the bed now, his back turned to me, although the distance between us felt too small. Or maybe too large.

I couldn’t seem to decide which.

But it didn’t matter, because it all came rushing back like a tsunami washing through my room.

The baby. The hospital. And most importantly, Nicholas’s drunken confession.

“That’s not my baby…”

He had uttered those words as he laid his large body on top of me, his hips positioned between my legs. His breath had been hot and familiar against my neck, and the sensation of his lips sloppily dragging across my skin still lingered, even now.

Was it true? Was the baby—Anna’s beautiful little boy—really not his?

I glanced over at Nicholas again, still passed out cold on my bed. He looked worlds away from waking up, seeing as how exhausted and drunk he had been. I wanted to ask him what the hell he had meant when he’d said those words last night, but I didn’t have the heart to wake him.

It was likely just the alcohol talking last night, or so I told myself. As far as I was aware, the paternity test results still weren’t back, so there was no way Nicholas could know for sure.

Still, looking over at him twisted my heart in ways I wasn’t ready for. A thin tendril of hope curled itself around my throat, hardly daring to make itself known.

If the baby truly wasn’t his, then that could mean…

No. I shook my head as if to dispel the thoughts, and the hope along with it. I had learned too long ago that hope wasn’t a thing with feathers, but rather a beast with claws that could drag you down into the murky depths of despair within the blink of an eye.

It hit me, then, that I was still dressed in my ‘getaway’ clothes from last night. At least one good thing had come out of Nicholas’s drunken escapades—I hadn’t made the mistake of making the trek to Grace’s cabin, which most certainly would have ended in the guild finding out about her. It was better this way.

Taking care not to wake Nicholas, I quietly got out of bed, showered quickly, and dressed in something comfortable but presentable. I had missed a girls’ day with Jade and Emma yesterday, and I wasn’t about to miss another one.

When I walked into the kitchen, Jade and Emma were already there, sipping coffee and chatting quietly. They looked up as I entered, their faces lighting up with smiles.

“Kayla!” Emma exclaimed, jumping up from her seat. “We were just about to come and wake you up.”

“Well, we were,” Jade added with a sly little grin, “but we made it to the base of the stairs and picked up Nicholas’s scent coming from your room.”

I rolled my eyes, already reaching for my coat. “It’s not what you think. He was drunk and babbling last night, and passed out in my bed.”

Jade and Emma exchanged glances that silently said that they knew I was withholding information, but didn’t argue when I asked them to come out with me.

The three of us piled into Jade’s car and made our way to town after that. They asked about Nicholas and the baby on our way, but I promptly changed the subject, not really in the mood to talk about it—or even think about it, for that matter.

My friends didn’t argue. They were all too happy to ignore it for now, too, which was something that I was incredibly grateful for.

Our first stop was the nail salon, where we spent an hour getting manicures and pedicures. They had already had their nails done yesterday, but got them done again anyway, especially since I was paying.

It was… nice. Relaxing. And if I kept my eyes shut for long enough, the darkness could consume any lingering thoughts I had about Nicholas, his drunken confession, his wet mouth dragging insistently across mine.

Although, there was no helping it when the ghostly sensation of his tongue lapping at my throat occasionally resurfaced. And no helping the tightening feeling between my legs in response.

As we sat there, our feet soaking in warm water and our hands being pampered, Jade suddenly spoke up.

“You know,” she said, “I never really had girlfriends before. Not like this.”

I glanced at her, surprised. “Really?”

She nodded, a small smile playing on her lips. “Yeah. I mean, I had acquaintances, but never anyone I could just hang out with like this. It’s nice. I love you girls, really.”

I felt a pang, knowing exactly what she meant. Before Jade and Emma, I hadn’t had many close friends either. No one except for Ava and Henry, if that counted, once I hit sixteen and the other kids realized that I was well and truly wolfless.

Other.

But even before that, I’d always had a hard time making friends. I was a lonesome and often sullen child, content with staring at the stars through my microscope and reading in trees. I was too much of a tomboy for the other girls in the pack, and too stubborn for the boys to put up with me.

For a long time, I convinced myself that I was okay with it, that I didn’t need friends. But now, as an adult, I realized just how much I’d missed out on meaningful female relationships for so long. I was glad to have Jade and Emma now—they were like two twinkling stars in my sky, visible even on a cloudy night.

“I get it,” I said softly. “It’s nice to have people you can just be yourself with.”

Jade smiled, her eyes meeting mine. “Yeah. It is.”

After the nail salon, we headed to a nearby cafe for brunch. We ordered pancakes and waffles and French toast and far too much coffee for any sane person to consume, sharing bites and laughing as we tried each other’s dishes.

After brunch, we hit the shops, browsing through racks of clothes and shelves of trinkets. We talked about the upcoming winter solstice celebration, which was in just a few short weeks, and about what we wanted to do and who we wanted to invite.

“I wish we could have a party at the cabin,” I mused with a sigh as I ran my fingers across a skein of soft yarn in a lovely fuschia color. “So Grace could be included.”

Emma tapped her chin thoughtfully, no doubt having the exact same concerns we all had. Going to the cabin right now was risky, to say the least—another reminder of just how stupid I had been last night in almost going there—and yet, at the same time, the thought of her being all alone for the solstice was… depressing.

Still, I tucked away the thought for later, planning to bring it up to Nicholas when I got a chance. He’d understand, surely; and maybe we could make an exception and go to visit her, just once.

As I was browsing across the shop, carefully picking out some things for Jade and Emma without them noticing, I spotted something else on display: a tiny, hand-knitted baby blanket, soft and delicate, with little stars and moons stitched into the fabric.

I hesitated, my hand hovering over the blanket. I didn’t want to think about the baby, didn’t want to acknowledge its existence, but something about the blanket called to me.

Before I could change my mind, I picked it up and added it to my purchases, not mentioning it to Jade or Emma.

By the time we finished shopping, the sun was starting to set, casting a warm, golden glow over the town. We loaded our bags into the car and headed home, my feet aching. On our way, we picked up some takeout food—with extra for the guys—and I was looking forward to a good glass of wine, a bad movie, and stuffing myself to the brim with greasy food.

But as we walked inside and saw Marcus standing in the doorway, his face ashen and Nicholas’s phone in his hand, my smile faded.

“Marcus?” I asked, noticing his grim expression. “Is something wrong?”

He looked almost… relieved to see me. But also incredulous, like one might look at their child who had been out all night without permission.

“Kayla,” he said, his voice breaking. “Where did you go all day?” His eyes darted to our shopping bags and the bags of food in our hands.

Jade, Emma, and I exchanged curious glances. “Out,” Jade replied simply. Emma added, holding up her shopping bag in a freshly manicured hand, “Girls’ day out.”

Marcus’s shoulders slumped with a combination of what looked like defeat and concern. “Shit.”

I furrowed my brow. “What?”

Sighing, Marcus pulled a slip of paper out of his pocket and handed it to me. My stomach sank as I unfolded it and recognized it as the letter I’d briefly scrawled last night. I had forgotten about it. Nicholas must have found it before I had a chance to dispose of it.

“Nicholas is gone,” Marcus explained. “He took off on his motorcycle, thinking you were at the cabin.”

I felt a pang of worry, my stomach twisting. “Why didn’t he call me to ask?”

Marcus hesitated, his eyes meeting mine. “He was in such a state, Kayla. He was worried that the guild might not just find Grace, but also…” His voice trailed off, as if he didn’t dare admit out loud that the real focus of Nicholas’s worry was on me—that the guild might find me and do something unspeakable.

“Anyway,” he went on, shaking his head, “he left in such a rush that he forgot his phone. Which means we’ll either need to go after him before he reaches the cabin, or hope he gets there and back without being caught by the guild.”

My stomach twisted painfully.

“Shit, indeed,” I muttered.