Chapter 66

I couldn’t understand how Joseph had known what Asher had said to me, word for word. It was something that had been said in private, and neither of us would have shared.

Joseph should have had no way of knowing.

Yet he still did.

I know Asher told you to take it off. Right after he said he would respect your decision to keep me in your life.

Joseph laughed, hard and cruel and fake. “Is this an accusation of some kind? Don’t be ridiculous. I only said what I figured he would say. He’s so predictable.”

His explanation felt far-fetched, but no farther than the alternative, which was that Joseph had somehow heard Asher and my conversation.

“I suppose…” I admitted.

“If you want to accuse me of something, just do it, Cynthia.” He sounded so aggressive, like he was ready to jump through the phone and shake me.

Impossible as I knew that to be, I still held my phone a few inches from my face, just in case. Sometimes Joseph’s anger made me feel irrational.

“I’m not,” I said. “You’re right and I’m sorry.”

This, finally, seemed to appease him. “Then wear that necklace from now on.”

“Okay,” I said quickly. I really wanted out of this phone call.

“Promise me, Cynthia.” He said my name like a threat.

“I promise.”

“Better. Now prove it.” He hung up on me.

Thank God.

Tossing my phone onto my bed, I crossed my room and opened the dresser drawer where I had stored Joseph’s necklace.

It was pretty, a sparkling silver moon with a deep-as-night gemstone tucked in the corner. The only noticeable problem it had was its heaviness. The weight of the pendant made the chain cut into the back of my neck.

Yet despite its weight, I shouldn’t have had any real reason not to want to wear it. Even so, the thought of placing it around my neck had me physically recoiling from the dresser.

It had to be all in my head, but the pendant almost seemed to me like a brand, declaring me Joseph’s property. So strange, it didn’t even have his name on it.

Yet I would know who it belonged to. Joseph would know too.

And Asher.

I swallowed down the taste of bile, rising up my throat.

I had agreed to wear the necklace, but surely that hadn’t meant while I was relaxing in my room. Next time I left, I’d put it on, but not now. Not here.

Sliding the drawer closed, hiding away the necklace once more, I immediately sighed in relief. My body sagged like I was a marionette with the strings cut.

That damned necklace seemed to set my whole body on edge.

I needed to get over this feeling. Joseph was likely my future. I could compromise on this.

I had to.

With the thoughts tucked away for now, I focused on practicing my apparitions.

With Lilith’s guidance, I was able to hold the likeness of Nicole for longer now. Clearer too.

I tried Aimee next, and could call her likeness with only part of the effort I had needed in the beginning.

“Better,” Lilith said with pride. “Call forth the visage of Asher for the next lesson.”

I hesitated. Maybe I should project the image of Joseph instead?

No sooner had the thought crossed my mind than Lilith discarded it.

“It will be easier to learn new skills with the projection you know best.”

I knew she was right, but… Maybe Joseph was only so mad at me all the time because I thought of Asher too much. “I should use someone else.”

It didn’t have to be Joseph. Maybe Nicole?

“Asher is the easiest for you to form and hold, and therefore the kindest on your body. Do not attempt to needlessly challenge yourself.”

Without even wearing it, I seemed to feel the phantom weight of that necklace. I tried to ignore it, for Aimee’s sake. I needed to learn, quickly. And to do that, I needed to think of Asher, not Joseph.

“Okay.”

Asher came to my mind quickly. It was so easy now, to form a projection of him. With time, I’d also managed to control his glow somewhat, though he was still easily the brightest apparition I could create.

It amused Lilith to no end. She didn’t tease me anymore, but I could feel her enjoyment within me, tickling at my own.

It was a comfort, and helped keep my other, bad feelings at bay.

“Good,” Lilith said. “Now make him speak.”

Speak? What would I even have him say?

At once, the apparition opened its mouth, like it’d only needed permission.

“You are safe with me,” it said, in Asher’s voice. “I want to protect you. I will never hurt you.”

Typical Asher. Protecting me even as an apparition.

“Good,” Lilith said, though now I detected her worry.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

She didn’t answer right away. “You should go see him. The real him. We need his comfort.”

Rattled, I let the apparition slip away from me. “Seeing him is a bad idea. Every time I do, I feel like I’m betraying Joseph.”

“What has Joseph done, to earn your faith? You are scared, and you need safety. The visage was proof. You should go to Asher.”

Eventually, I allowed myself to agree, but only if I wore Joseph’s necklace.

With it around my throat, I went to Asher’s dorm room and knocked.

I hadn’t told him I was coming, I half-expected him to be out. I wasn’t sure yet if I wanted him to be home or not.

I ached to see him, just as Lilith had said. But I knew running to him every time I had a fight with Joseph would only fan the flames of hatred between the two, as well as make Joseph angrier with me.

Yet when Asher opened the door, I felt nothing but relief surge through me.

My body couldn’t hide the truth. Despite how much my brain tried to talk me out of it, I had desperately wanted him to be home.

Without a word, he stepped back and let me into his room. With the door closed, he walked toward me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

I didn’t know how to tell him. “Nothing, really, I just…” I sighed. “I wanted to see you.”

His concern creased his brow, but only until his gaze lowered to my neck.

At once, his entire body tensed. His hands formed fists. Power and rage flooded out of him, filling the space of the room.

His blue eyes were as wild as a hurricane. His wolf was clawing under his skin, demanding release.

I’d seen it before.

Yet with all his fury, I was calm. I knew without any trace of doubt that Asher would not ever hurt me. This fact I felt down into my bones, like it was an intrinsic part of myself.

I am Cynthia. I am pregnant. Lilith is my wolf. Asher would never hurt me.

These were my truths, sketched into my very soul.

So I did not cower when Asher came closer, towering above me. I didn’t flinch when his hand shot out, clutching the necklace.

I only winced when he lifted it, chain shifting against the marks it had cut into my skin.

He noticed, gaze briefly scanning over my neck.

His rage only amplified.

He growled at the pendant. Fingers, claw like, curled into the metal. He could bend it with his werewolf strength, if he tapped into it.

As angry as he seemed, he might.

He also might rip it from my neck.

Secretly, I hoped for both.

If Joseph had made me his possession, Asher could set me free.