Chapter 184

“Lamar, wait –”

Lamar covered my mouth with his. As I gasped, he slipped his tongue into my mouth and licked at my own.

I pushed at his shoulders, but he wrapped his arms around my waist, holding me too tightly to let go.

When he finally pulled back from the kiss, I turned my head so he couldn’t steal another. However, the action left my neck exposed, and he latched his mouth there instead.

“Lamar, stop.”

“I’ll make you feel good, Cynthia. You can trust that.”

“That’s not why I want you to stop.”

He lifted his face from my neck and gave me a wolfish grin. “I’ll record it for you too, so you can watch me between your legs whenever you need to get off.”

Record me?

“This is too much,” I said. “I’m not ready.”

“I’m only trying to give you pleasure,” Lamar said, tilting his head. “You don’t want to feel good?”

“I’m not ready,” I said again, more firmly. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. What he was offering was a nice gesture, and under different circumstances, maybe I would have been grateful.

But… thinking of him with his mouth between my thighs, with me so vulnerable and exposed to him…

My stomach lurched dangerously. I might be sick.

On a good day, I still wouldn’t have been ready for this. But now, after that fight, and with Asher still tangling with his wolf out on the sidewalk, my heart was a tangled mess.

Not only did I not want this, I didn’t even want to be in this room anymore.

I pushed against Lamar’s shoulders again, but he didn’t as much as budge.

“Lamar. Let me go.”

My heartrate jumped. Why wasn’t he letting up?

“I want to leave, Lamar.”

“I don’t understand you at all, Cynthia. What kind of woman doesn’t want to feel good?”

“I told you I’m not ready!” As my panic rose, so did my voice.

He laughed. “I’ll have you singing a different tune soon enough.”

“Lamar!”

He pushed me across the room, toward his bed.

“Lamar! Stop!”

“You are going to enjoy this,” he said. “I don’t even want anything in return.”

“Please, stop!”

He shoved me down onto the bed. I scrambled to get away, but he quickly pounced on top of me. He wedge himself between my legs.

I struggled as best I could.

“Stop fighting,” he said.

I tried to sit upright.

He slapped me across my face so hard, my vision darkened a moment. White hot pain seared my cheek.

Gasping, I fell back onto the bed.

Leaning over me, he pressed his body into mine. His eyes were crazed. “You made me do that. If you calm down, I could be gentle.”

Tears welled in my eyes. I couldn’t understand what was happening. Lamar hadn’t always been the most considerate person, but to do something like this?

I never would have suspected. How could I ever have trusted him? How could I have let myself get into this mess?

My heart cried out for Asher, and my tears slipped from my eyes.

Lamar didn’t care what I wanted. He was going to force me to accept his mouth on me, even if it made me sick.

He lapped at my neck again, sucking in ugly, unwanted marks.

Only Asher was allowed to touch me like this.

But Asher… Was he still out in the quad, struggling to control his wolf?

I never should have left him!

“What did you say to Asher?” I said. “You said something, didn’t you?”

He bit into the meat of my shoulder – hard.

I cried out in pain.

He chuckled against my skin. “Stay in the moment with me, Cynthia. Say his name again, and you’ll be punished.”

Punished? What punishment could be worse than this?

“Let me go, Lamar. Please.”

He smirked. “Not until I’ve tasted you.” He glanced above them, then, up at the headboard. “Ah, I almost forgot.”

Holding me still with his legs, he withdrew his phone from his pocket and set up something on the screen. Then he reached above him to where a mount was set up above the headboard. He affixed the phone to the mount.

With the phone set up, I could see the screen. It was a mirror of Lamar sitting over me.

He was recording.

He’d had everything set up for this. Was this something he had been planning?

Or was this such a regular occurrence for him that he had his equipment arranged at all times?

“Lamar…” More tears fell. Everything I thought I knew about him felt like a lie.

He was a vile, despicable person. A predator. A fiend.

“That’s it, baby. Keep saying my name.”

He reached for the bottom hem of my shirt and yanked it up to my collarbone, exposing my lacy bra. He palmed at me roughly, before sitting back on his heels.

He looked down at me with hungry, greedy eyes. His hands went for the clasp of my jeans. He ripped it open.

“Stop… please…”

I was trapped. He was stronger than me, and more prepared.

In my mind, I searched for Lilith, but she was so exhausted. She had protected the baby while I ran across campus. She was too tired to help me now.

Lamar yanked down my jeans.

I squeezed my eyes shut. I didn’t want to look at him. I didn’t want to see what was happening.

Maybe I could separate myself from my body. If I could pull my spirit away and travel anywhere, it would be to Asher’s side.

Asher, so protective, so gentle. If I’d told Asher no, he would have stopped. He would have respected me.

I wished he was here. I wanted him so badly, my longing clawed at my chest like it was trying to escape from the inside out.

“That’s it, baby,” Lamar said. I felt his hot breath on my thigh. “Let me teach you what real pleasure is.”

More tears fell, as my heart cried, Asher.

I must have said it aloud, because Lamar bit into the meat of my thigh, hard enough to bleed.

I gasped.

“I promised to punish you,” Lamar said, voice low with anger. “I’ll beat him out of you if I have to.”

I whimpered.

“You say anything but my name and you will suffer.” His eyes lifted to mine. That wasn’t the friendly expression I had been used to. That was the devouring look of a devil, stealing what wasn’t his. “Do you understand?”

I didn’t answer right away. So he dug his fingers into the bite wound, making me cry out with pain.

“Say you understand,” he growled.

I’d thought he only wanted me to say his name. I didn’t know what to say to get the hurting to stop.

“Say my fucking name, Cynthia,” he said.

My eyes glazed over, my attention drifted. The pain helped set me away. I could be somewhere else.

I just needed to detach…

At the door to the room, I watched an apparition of Asher appear. His eyes were wild with fury as he took in the sight before him.

I should have cut the tether and made the apparition disappear. It was dangerous to have it here, especially with the camera…

But I didn’t care anymore. Let my secret be known. Let every terrible thing happen.

I wanted Asher here.

If I could keep him in my line of sight, then maybe I could survive this.

I just had to survive.

But then… the apparition roared.

Had I made it do that? I didn’t… I couldn’t think…

Lamar startled, looking back.

And Asher fully shifted into a wolf.