Chapter 174

Quickly, I closed my eyes, focused on the projection within my mind, and snuffed it out. When I peeked my eyes open again, the glowing apparition of Asher was gone.

But by then, it was already too late. Nicole had seen.

“I can explain,” I said.

Nicole stuck her head up from her hiding spot on the other side of my bed. “Cynthia… was that…?”

I nodded. There was no denying it now. Still, I felt nervous saying it aloud and whispered it instead, “I have the projection ability.”

Her eyes went wide. “Why did you… why would you…?”

I could only guess what she wanted to ask me. “I’ve been having trouble controlling it lately. That Asher apparition, all I have to do is think of Asher and it appears.”

“But… how…?”

“My wolf came early, so my ability did too.”

“It’s so rare…”

“I know,” I said.

Nicole’s brow furrowed as she pushed herself up onto her feet. She frowned as she rounded the bed and rejoined me by the textbooks.

“It’s been a struggle,” I said, when she didn’t say anything. “I have to hide it, but I keep projecting Asher by accident. If I do it in public…” A shiver rain down my spine.

Nicole sat on the edge of my bed. “Why didn’t you tell me about any of this?”

“I wanted to. But I was scared.”

“Cynthia, you have so many secrets. I thought we’d talked about this. I thought we knew everything about each other now…”

I could feel her drawing away from me, so I stood up to sit beside her on the bed. I bumped my knee into hers.

“This ability puts us all in danger,” I said. “There are investigators looking for me, and if they find me, they’ll put me in some kind of lab and throw away the key. And when the baby is born…”

I protectively covered my stomach with hands.

Nicole looked at me, a hint of fear widening her eyes. “What will they do?”

“They’ll take the baby from me. I don’t know what will happen after that.” My hands trembled.

Nicole leaned her shoulder into mine. “I don’t like us keeping secrets.”

“I’m sorry.”

“But this one, I understand,” she continued. “You have to know I would never hurt you or your baby.”

I nodded. I did know that. But it was still a relief to hear her say so out loud. “So you will keep my secret?”

“Of course,” Nicole said. “But… you really didn’t mean to create that Asher ghost?”

“All I have to do is think of Asher, and it appears automatically.” I lowered my head, embarrassed. “I miss him.”

“You must,” Nicole said, softer. Something seemed to change in her. I wasn’t sure what, but she seemed more… sympathetic than she had been before. “I knew you loved Asher, but I didn’t realize it was quite like… this.”

“It’s more.”

If Asher hadn’t said those hurtful things, I would have tried to stay by his side for the rest of my life, in whatever capacity he would have me.

Nicole smiled a little, small. She opened her mouth as if to say something when a chime sounded from my phone, indicating a text message.

“You better check that,” she said. “It could be Asher.”

Asher. Not Lamar.

Was Nicole warming up to Asher again?

I pushed off the bed and walked to my desk to retrieve my phone. I unlocked it.

“It is Asher.”

I clicked on the message.

Can you meet at my room? We need to talk.

I read the text aloud to Nicole, who instantly hopped off the bed and came to my side.

“What are you going to do?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I have to meet him, right?”

“This is your chance to get the other half of the story. That’s what you wanted.”

It was, but I still felt nervous about it. Returning to Asher’s dorm felt like I would be admitting something. I wasn’t sure what. I wasn’t sure I was ready to go back.

Would I be able to control my heart?

But Nicole was right. This was my chance to get my answers.

So I replied to the text, Okay.

I knocked on Asher’s door, and he answered quickly.

His room looked exactly the same since I’d last been inside of it, with everything tidy and in its place. A bit of disappointment struck me. It was selfish, but I’d hoped my absence would have left some kind of effect on him.

He seemed normal. Tired, with bags under his eyes, but normal.

Normal was handsome, unbearably so. His dark hair was messy as usual, windswept. His blue eyes were deep as the ocean. I’d missed everything about him: the slope of his nose, the cut of his jaw, those shoulders that stretched on for miles.

He wore a black t-shirt and dark jeans, black socks. He cut a perfect figure, looking like he stepped straight out of magazine.

“Thank you for coming over,” Asher said.

“I’m glad you suggested it. I really want to hear what you have to say.”

“You won’t like it.” He glanced away.

He scratched at his arm, and I noticed one thing different.

The skin on his knuckles was red, scabbed-over, like he’d been in a fight. I looked closer at him, searching him over for other wounds, but he had nothing else visible.

Lamar had said he’d taken one hit and dropped. He wouldn’t have had time to defend himself. Was it possible Asher punched him after all?

I felt sick in my stomach.

“What happened there?” I asked, pointing to his hands. The least I could do was give him a chance to explain himself.

He looked down. “Oh. I hit the bag too hard at the gym. I’ve already broken two of them.”

That was a plausible explanation, but Asher should know how to hit a bag without hurting himself. Why wasn’t he wearing gloves?

“That’s it?” I asked. “You didn’t… catch your knuckles on anything else?”

He frowned. “No?”

“Maybe someone said something to you that you didn’t like.”

His brow furrowed.

“Maybe your wolf came out?” I asked.

“What are you talking about? I went to the gym. I hit the bag. That’s what happened.”

“You don’t have to lie to me, Asher. I can handle the truth.”

“Cynthia. I genuinely do not know what you are talking about. If you are trying to get me to say something, you’ll just have to ask me.” He lifted his wounded hand. “I did this at the gym.”

Ug! This dancing around was getting me nowhere. Either Asher was being purposefully obtuse or he genuinely did not know what I was talking about.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I just needed to ask him flat out.

I inhaled, gathering my courage.

I’d been confident that Asher hadn’t hurt Lamar, but seeing his knuckles… I wasn’t as sure now. I wanted to believe in Asher, but maybe I should have listened more to Lamar.

No, I couldn’t fear the answers to questions I hadn’t asked yet. I could let myself be upset after I heard what he had to say.

If I was wrong about Asher, I’d deal with it once I knew the truth.

“Asher,” I started, and immediately lost my nerve.

“Cynthia,” he replied.

I rubbed my forehead. Just ask him. You’ll feel better when you do.

I licked my lips and tried again, “Asher, did you punch Lamar?”

Asher stilled.