Chapter 125

I couldn’t believe my ears. Asher still believed that I had lingering feelings for Joseph? After everything we’d been through? After everything Joseph had done?

“You were in his snare for a long time,” Asher said, frowning. “I’d understand if you are still… entangled.”

Immediately, I reached forward and placed my hand on Asher’s arm. Holding his icy gaze, I said, “Joseph was my first love, it’s true. But… he isn’t the person I thought he was. And I caught wise to that a long time ago.”

Slowly, I walked my fingers up the curves and muscles of Asher’s arm to his shoulder. Asher watched every inch.

“Truth is,” I said, “why would I be interested in someone like that when I have the attention of someone like you?”

As I pressed my palm flat against the meat of his shoulder, I felt him physically release some of the tension he’d been harboring.

He seemed to enjoy my compliments. So I decided to keep giving them.

“Someone strong, and capable. Who keeps me safe. And is handsome to boot.”

The corner of Asher’s mouth twitched. “You think I’m handsome?”

I rolled my eyes. “Asher, you know you are drop-dead gorgeous.”

“Maybe.” That tiny smile of his grew into a lop-sided smirk. “But it’s nice to hear you think so.”

If I had known that all it would take to get him to smile was a slew of compliments, I would have buried him under them sooner. Though his smirk begged me to tease him. His ego was already big enough!

I tried to hide my own smile. “Well, don’t let it go to your head.”

“Why not?” Asher asked. “When a beautiful woman tells you she finds you attractive –”

“Beautiful?”

His smirk softened and my whole heart melted. He took my hand in his and ran his thumb across my knuckles.

“Beautiful,” he confirmed.

Maybe I wasn’t immune to compliments either. My cheeks burned hot.

“Well, I guess that means we’re made for each other then,” I stumbled over my words, “Since we both find each other so attractive.”

He brought my hand to his lips and kissed the back of my palm. “I think so.”

I’d meant to distract him from his fears of Joseph, and I accomplished that. But I also distracted myself from whatever it was that I was on my way to do.

When Asher asked me to go share a meal with him, I could only agree.

Much later, I would remember that I was on my way to see Nancy. I called her instead.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “I got on the list, and I have a plan.”

The day of the physicals, I went to cheerleading practice in loose-fitting clothes. With PVC pipes and plastic curtains, the staff had arranged several make-shift exam rooms in the gymnasium.

Several doctors and nurses waited near the entrance. As girls came in, they would pull them into the rooms for the exams.

Nancy spotted me right away and pulled me aside.

In the curtained exam room, I changed into a hospital gown. When I was decent, Nancy asked me to stand on a scale that was arranged beside a mirror.

“You could afford to put on a bit more weight,” Nancy said, checking the numbers.

“When I pass the qualifying exam, I can slow down some,” I said. “Really focus on…” The baby. I was afraid to speak too loudly with such flimsy separation between the exam rooms.

Fortunately, Nancy seemed to know what I meant. “Good. That’s good.”

Then she directed me to the hospital bed, where she checked my lungs and heartbeat. She performed the physical, same as everyone else, but omitted a few key factors from the report. Mainly, my pregnancy.

When the main physical was done, Nancy went to her satchel bag and pulled out a manila folder, with a set of x-rays inside.

“Is that…?” My voice trailed. “How did you get that?” It had to be x-rays of someone else, someone around my height, weight, and age. Only not pregnant.

“Don’t ask questions,” she said. Softer, she whispered, “If I tell you, you won’t have plausible deniability.”

The way she said it made clear that she could get in serious trouble for this. That made me want to argue, but she shot me a severe look, silencing me.

“This is the only way. I’ll write down here that you recently had these x-rays done. I can stake my reputation on it. No one should have too much radiation, in your condition or not. It would be unethical to require further x-rays when these are so recent.”

I really hated that she might get into hot water for me, but she seemed determined. And without her help, I wouldn’t be able to pass this physical.

“Thank you,” I said, meaning it from the bottom of my heart.

She pulled me into a quick hug. “Promise me you won’t ever give up on your dreams.”

Her urgency gave me a jolt of fear – for her, for me. But I quickly agreed. “I promise.”

Nancy attached the x-rays to my report. “You can change back into your clothes now. I’m going to go hand in your exam. Everything should be fine after that.”

I nodded. “Thanks again.” I could keep thanking her and it would never feel like enough.

She gave me a kind smile in answer and disappeared from the make-shift room.

Standing in front of the mirror, I removed the hospital gown and slipped on my pants. In just my pants and bra, I looked at my reflection. From the front, I looked normal enough, but from the side… my baby was growing.

I rubbed my hands over my belly. I was nervous about the qualifying exam, but I was just as excited for it to be over. I couldn’t wait to concentrate on being pregnant. Eating and relaxing and taking care of us two. And Asher was sure to pamper me if I let him.

Maybe everything would be okay, after all. Maybe I’d be able to achieve my dreams and have my baby, and keep Asher.

For once, some of my fears cleared away, and I felt confident and satisfied.

Maybe I could have everything I ever wanted.

“Don’t worry, baby,” I whispered, gently holding my belly. “Your mom can do this.”

A soft gasp brought my gaze up to my reflection, and at the wide-eyed face behind me. I swiveled around, facing my fellow cheerleader who had entered my exam room.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I thought this was where I was supposed to go. I… uh… I’ll go now!” She backed away before I could say anything, the curtain falling behind her, hiding her retreat.

I froze totally. How much had she heard? How much had she seen?

How could I be so careless? I let my guard down at the worst possible moment! Of course I wasn’t truly alone with only these flimsy plastic curtains for walls, and all of the other cheerleaders in rooms surrounding me.

Nancy returned to my room soon after. One look at my face, and her entire demeanor changed. She grew serious, approaching me like I was a true patient in crisis.

“Cynthia, what’s wrong?” she asked. “Do you feel okay? Where does it hurt?”

I looked at her, tears welling in my eyes.

I had been so close to having everything I wanted. And I blew it, simply by forgetting where I was.

“I ruined everything,” I said, voice shaky.

“What are you talking about?”

Fear squeezed my heart. “They know.”