Chapter 49

Ava

It was only moments after I saw Chris retreat inside that I found myself hurring up the steps to the Packhouse’s entrance, my heart pounding in my ears. Leonard’s words replayed over and over in my mind—there was a way for Chris and I to be together, if that was truly what we both wanted.

But did he want that? After the look of anger and disdain he had shot me moments before disappearing inside, I couldn’t be certain of anything anymore.

Pushing through the arched front doors, I paused just inside the foyer to get my bearings. The entrance hall was blessedly empty now that Lily’s entourage was leaving—although I couldn’t help but wonder why. As I made my way up the stairs toward Chris’s office, where I assumed he might be, I wondered if perhaps their date hadn’t gone to plan.

Without even knocking, I flung the door open to his office and stepped in.

“Chris, what’s going on?”

Chris, who was standing by the window and looking out at the gardens below, snapped his head around and shot me a wary look. “Do you need something?” he asked, his words polite but his tone clipped.

I frowned. “Did I do something? If looks could kill…”

Chris paused for a moment, as though considering the right words, before speaking. “Weren’t you on a date with Leonard? Why come here now?”

I blinked absurdly at him, momentarily taken aback by the anger simmering just beneath the surface of his voice.

“A date?” I echoed. “What are you talking about?”

“I saw you two at the cafe earlier, holding hands. I’m happy for you Ava, really…” His voice trailed off, but I could still hear the hurt hidden behind his words; he was trying to quell it, just as I had quelled my jealousy over Lily.

And just as it had for me, his attempts to hide his upset clearly weren’t working.

“Leonard and I had breakfast together, yes,” I said, smoothing down the front of my light sundress. “But only because I helped him deliver a calf this morning. We’re just friends, Chris. Nothing more.”

Chris turned fully toward me then, silhouetted by the afternoon sunlight coming in through the window. He looked handsome, even now, with his jaw set hard and his broad shoulders straining against the cotton fabric of his shirt.

“So you’re telling me that you’re not seeing him romantically?”

“No,” I replied with a bitter laugh. “We’re just friends.”

There was a long silence then, and I watched as a flurry of emotions crossed Chris’s face: disbelief, annoyance, anger. He seemed to settle on anger.

“I have a hard time believing you, after what I found out last night,” he hissed.

“Last night?”

“Your… arrangement with the Elders,” he replied coldly. “Your little plan to keep me here, to… seduce me into staying, and all the while you were romancing Leonard and setting up arranged marriages for me like I’m some kind of political pawn.”

The sting of his words hit me like an electric shock, leaving me reeling. I took an involuntary step backwards and gripped the back of the chair across from his desk to steady myself.

“Chris, I—”

“Don’t even bother coming up with excuses,” he said, turning to the window once more. “Goddess, I thought we had something special, Ava. I feel like such a fool now.”

I gripped the chair a little tighter. “But we did,” I murmured. “We… did have something special, Chris. Look, I…”

I fell silent then, my mind whirling. Part of his assumption was true: I had been tasked with keeping him here in order to fulfill the prophecy. But as far as the arranged marriage went, I had had no clue whatsoever about that.

“Chris,” I finally managed, “I know… I know it was wrong of me to agree to try and keep you here. But everything else—the late nights, the date—all of that was real. I never did any of that to manipulate you.”

I trailed off, feeling myself choke up with the tears that burned at the backs of my eyes and the bottom of my throat. My palms began to itch, and I clamped my fingers even tighter around the chair as if that would somehow help.

Slowly, Chris turned back to face me. His anger was still there, but some of it had ebbed away, replaced by what almost looked like relief.

“And the arranged marriage?” he asked.

I shook my head. “I never had anything to do with that. Trust me, I was just as surprised as you were; upset, even.”

“Upset?” he cocked his head to the side and took a step closer.

“Yes. I don’t want you to be with her.”

Another silence fell after that. Slowly, almost hesitantly, Chris strode over to me until there was only a foot of space between us. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, like he was searching for the right words but just couldn’t seem to find them.

“I need you to be honest with me, Ava,” he said, his intense gaze boring into me. “What do you want from me?”

“What do I… want from you?” I whispered.

He nodded. “You don’t want me to be with Lily, but… Do you want us to just be friends, to move on with our lives separately in peace? Or…” He hesitated, seeming to wrestle with himself for a moment. “Or is part of you holding out hope that we might still have a chance to be together?”

The air left my lungs in a rush, as if I had just taken a physical blow to the gut. This was the question I had been grappling with for so long—the one I had tried in vain to bury and ignore each time it surfaced. But now, with Chris standing in front of me looking more vulnerable than I had ever seen him, I found I could no longer retreat behind my lies.

“Yes,” I whispered hoarsely after what felt like an eternity of silence. “Part of me... part of me does want to be with you, Chris.”

I watched as a myriad of emotions flickered across his chiseled features, and he was silent. Just when I thought the tension might swallow me whole, Chris spoke again.

“But there are reasons why you don’t want that too, aren’t there?” he asked knowingly.

I nodded, feeling my throat grow tight. “I’m too old for you, for starters,” I said in a rush. “Not to mention that I was married before, so I can’t even properly be your Luna, not in the eyes of the pack. And beside, I’m still getting over Ethan, still healing. I just... I don’t know if I can give you what you need, what you deserve.”

Chris was silent for a long moment, seemingly digesting my whirlwind of reasoning. Then, before I could even process what was happening, he crossed the short distance between us in two long strides.

My breath caught in my throat as I found myself suddenly pulled into the warmth of his strong arms, my face mere inches from his. I could see every tiny fleck of gold amidst the vibrant green of his eyes, could feel the thrumming of his pulse against mine where our bodies were pressed together.

“If that’s what you want, Ava,” he murmured, his deep voice seeming to reverberate through me, “then we’ll figure it out... together.”

And then his lips were on mine, desperate and yearning. I melted into the kiss without hesitation, savoring the taste of his mouth as my fingers curled into the soft strands of his hair. For those moments, nothing else mattered. It was just us, two souls, hoping that the next moments—that reality—would never come.

But it did. And it came far faster than I had hoped.

Before we could even pull apart for air, two sounds echoed in the space behind us: the door creaking open, and a loud gasp.