Chapter 7 7

Once I was mercifully alone once again, I crossed to the window and leaned my head against the glass, staring down at the busy street below. My thoughts were a mess I didn't want to sift through just yet, if I tried to think about Elias, I wasn't sure I wouldn't end up a sobbing mess.

I stayed like that for a while, my thoughts carefully blank. Somehow, watching people move about their daily lives grounded me a little and helped soothe my emotions. With one last sigh, I stepped away from the window and started getting dressed.

I put on a black, long-sleeved knit dress and light makeup, my hair up in a loose French twist. With a wistful smile, I put on the pair of pearl earrings and necklace set that Paul had gifted me on my graduation from college, and the memories hit me as I regarded myself in the mirror.

I was packing up the last few items into my suitcase when a knock sounded on my door.

"One minute." I called out and crossed to open the door.

"I'm sorry to bother you," Willow began, "I need your help."

It took a minute for her words to sink in. “My help?”

She smiled ruefully and gestured to the front of her dress. For the first time, I noticed the damp brown stain that looked like coffee. “I…ah…had a little accident with the coffeemaker.”

“Oh.” I said, nodding slowly, not quite sure what that had to do with needing my help. “Um…would you like to clean up here?” There were two perfectly fine bathrooms downstairs, so her standing here was still a mystery. Nevertheless, I stepped aside to let her come into my room, trying not to inhale the scent of her perfume because I didn’t trust my stomach not to revolt again. I didn’t want to end up with my head buried in the toilet bowl for the third time today.

“Thank you,” Willow breezed past me, her eyes scanning over the room. I shut the door and turned to watch her, feeling slightly self conscious at how untidy my room was due to my packing.

“The bathroom’s that way.” I pointed towards the door of the bathroom and moved to the bed to carry on stuffing things in my open suitcase. “There’s a bathrobe in there, you can change out of your stained clothes and I’ll run a quick wash in the washing machine for you. Your clothes should be dry in an hour at most.”

“I don’t think it’ll be easy to get this stain out.” Willow rubbed a hand over the damp stain with a grimace. When I looked at her in askance, she added. “It’s a Joan Ruben, machine wash is definitely not recommended for this kind of fabric.”

“Oh…” I didn’t know much about high end fashion, preferring to get clothes that I didn’t have to worry about ruining and I was comfortable in, but I recognised the name of the designer she’d mentioned and knew that their stuff didn’t come cheap. “Well, then…”

“You’re a size ten?” She gave me a onceover, taking in my proportions while I tried not to squirm under the critical gaze. Then I checked myself, wondering why I let her get to me. I straightened and met her gaze steadily, already guessing where this was heading and not sure I liked it.

“Twelve.” I replied, reaching for the last pair of my underwear and stuffing it in my suitcase. “Willow, I’m not sure I have any clothes that might fit you, certainly not designer ones.” I had also left single digit sizes behind since my sixteenth birthday when I had a growth sprout and moved seemingly overnight from a size eight to a ten and I had never gone down since then. Plus, Willow was a svelte size four, so there was no chance in hell any of my clothes would fit.

“It’s fine,” She assured me with a laugh, twirling one strand of perfect honey blonde hair. “I just need a shirt, luckily the jacket and skirt are fine. I can work with a shirt your size. Elias offered me one of his shirts, but I can’t possibly wear any of his, they’re way too big.”

Of course he did. I pursed my lips in disapproval and looked away, not wanting her to see my emotion. Idly, I wondered if she had ever worn any of Elias’s shirts before and almost threw up again at the mental image of Willow, barefoot, hair mused, dressed in nothing but Elias’s shirt, being held in his arms while they….

Stop torturing yourself. I scolded my mind and forced those images away, hating the bad aftertaste it left in my heart.

I waved vaguely towards my walk-in closet. “Sure, help yourself.”

“Thanks, I’ll be sure to be careful with it.” She gave me a grateful smile and wandered over to the closet to start looking through my clothes while I returned to my packing, this time too distracted to pay much attention to what I was shoving in there.

“The turnout for the funeral will be impressive, I’m sure.” Willow said, trying to make idle conversation. “Afterall, Mr. Sinclair was a well known and highly respected figure in our society, a lot of people will be there to pay their respects.”

“Yes, that’s likely.” I replied reluctantly. The last I wanted was to carry out idle chitchat, not when there were so many things weighing heavily on my mind.

Done with packing, I looked around for my purse, then remembered it was in the closet. For some reason, Willow had suddenly gone quiet. Curious, I walked inside, wondering if she had found a shirt. She had her back to me, head bent, looking at something in her hand.

"Did you find something to wear?" I asked.

She started and whipped around, her face unusually pale. "Uhhh….what?"

"A shirt. Did you find a suitable shirt?"

"Oh…" She looked flustered for a moment as though she'd forgotten why she was in my closet. She looked around, and picked up a pale pink shirt, and held it up with a bright smile. "Yes, yes. I think this will fit just fine."

I nodded, then gestured to my purse which was sitting on the shelf behind her. "Could you pass me that black purse, please?"

“Of course,” her laugh sounded so high and strained that I wondered what the hell had gotten into her. She handed me the purse and brushed past me with quick steps. “I’ll just go change, I’m sure the guys must be ready to set out by now.”

I watched her hurry towards the door, but then she paused and turned around. “Thanks for the shirt, I’ll be sure to get it back to you in one piece.”

“Yeah, no problem.”