Chapter 75

Elroy’s POV

The moment Olivia's breathing evened out in sleep, my wolf growled angrily in my mind. I pursed my lips, knowing exactly why.

Olivia looked so peaceful in her sleep. Even now, seeing her safe and sound sent a wave of relief through me, just as it had when I'd found her alive after the Rogue attack. But I’d let her down tonight, and I knew it.

The truth was, it was hard to brush off her request. It had thrilled me when she’d suggested loosening the contract, showing our relationship had evolved past legal jargon, and I could honestly still feel my heart soaring just knowing she felt closer to me.

It was a sign of trust—there was a short clause in the contract, one we hadn’t dwelled over for long but was worded very clearly, outlining how I would lose all parental rights over our child if I ever abused her. The idea of losing my rights was horrifying to me, but it hadn’t been hard to agree. It was true we hadn’t known each other yet, and if she needed that clause to feel safe then it felt like a reasonable concession.

After all, an abusive man deserved to lose his family. I knew I would never raise my hand against her, so it was a moot point anyway for me.

But for her to say she was comfortable removing that stipulation… It meant she knew I wouldn’t hurt her, even if there were no consequences for me, and that meant more than I would ever be able to say.

But I’d turned her down, and I could see how disappointed she was.

You’re an idiot, my wolf growled, and I silently agreed. You love her, you want to love her, so what’s the fucking problem?

You know the problem, I thought back to him. I just…can’t forget that feeling from back then.

But my wolf wasn't having it. His displeasure radiated through our shared consciousness, making it impossible to find rest.

You think I can? he snapped. Of course we remember it, we will always remember it, but you’re letting it blind you to what you have right now!

I looked over to Olivia, tracing the curve of her cheek with my eyes. The soft bow of her lips, the delicate arch of her brows, the fan of her hair—everything about her called to me, body and soul. How dare my wolf call me blind to this?

I sighed, running a hand through my hair as memories flooded back – memories of a girl I'd never seen, but who had saved my life. A girl I’d sworn to find again.

It feels like a betrayal, I admitted, ashamed of myself. I’ve spent years looking for that girl, to thank her for saving me, and moving on without doing it feels…wrong, somehow.

The truth was, I owed that girl a great debt.

After I presented and left the tower there had been a target on my back, and not just from inside Eclipse. One of the most powerful packs of Lunaris suddenly has a new potential heir, someone totally unknown, who seemingly came out of nowhere and earned the Alpha’s attention? Of course a lot of people saw me as a threat.

I still didn’t know who did it, but one moment I’d been awake and the next I was waking up in the hospital with a splitting headache. I’d been ambushed and kidnapped, still unused to having to watch my surroundings—something I’d never learned to do while living in seclusion with my mother—and horribly wounded. According to the doctors, I should have been on the brink of death.

But I wasn’t.

Where I’d taken damage there was pink new skin, so fresh against the rest of me that it easily marked what injuries I’d sustained, but all those injuries were gone. Healed, as if by magic. It had been like that when I’d been found.

Healing was a divine gift, one so rare it was basically myth, and someone had used it on me.

I had been unconscious the whole time, drowning in a sea of darkness, but I had felt her. The healer. Not physically, but in my soul.

It had been like she touched the very core of me, reached in and left her fingerprints in places even I couldn’t reach, but instead of a violation it felt like a blessing. There was this deep, resonating connection, a sense of soul-deep rightness that I was still chasing nearly a decade later. I yearned for it on a level as essential as instinct.

The pull, the need to find her, was a constant in my life. It was always there, in every meeting, every battle, every law signed. Even now, with the woman I loved right next to me, I could feel the pull calling to me.

I hated myself for it a little bit.

You’re choosing a ghost over our Mate, my wolf said. I felt guilt spear me.

You know I’m not trying to! I can’t help it, I genuinely can’t.

I sighed, shifting carefully to not disturb Olivia’s sleep. I just have to find that healer, I said, with more hope than conviction. I need to find her, thank her, and give her whatever it is she wants as payment, and then it’ll be done.

My wolf radiated skepticism. I couldn’t blame him; I wasn’t sure I believed myself either. You’re a fool, he said, throwing away what’s real for a memory.

Just…give me more time, I begged. Once I find this healer and repay my debt, I can move forward without all this guilt.

Even as I said it, doubt gnawed at me. Could I really let go of that past connection so easily? The memory of that healing touch still sent shivers down my spine, just as vivid as the day it occurred, and its absence had been this unshakable emptiness ever since.

I looked down at Olivia's sleeping form, conflict tearing me apart. She deserved better than this, better than my divided heart. No, my heart wasn’t divided—it was fully committed to her, to my Mate and our future, but there was this, this…something that stood in the way.

I closed my eyes, trying to focus on the present, on Olivia. But unbidden, memories of that long-ago healing flooded my senses – the singing warmth that had suffused my body, the silver light that had danced behind my eyelids.

I couldn’t put into words the profound connection I'd felt, even in my semiconscious state. It was more than gratitude, more than a simple crush. It had marked me, changed me in ways I still didn't fully understand.

And a part of me knew, no matter how much I tried to deny it, there was nothing I could do to shake it off. I was bound to that girl, just like I was bound to Olivia, and there was nothing I could do about it.