Chapter 83

“What - what do you mean?”

What the hell kind of sinister plan does she have up her sleeve?

“Moon Shadow is waffling in its support of Ansel. My father’s been furious with him since he broke off our engagement. You have -“ Cherry breaks off. She’s fighting back angry tears. “You have no idea how humiliating that was. Especially to be dumped for a whore.”

Cherry’s lucky I’m not at normal emotional capacity. I’d probably spit back at her - right in her face.

As it is, it turns out my rational brain is better at sarcasm and comebacks.

“Wah-wah,” I say in my best baby voice. I roll my eyes.

Cherry growls and nearly slashes my face with her claws, but Blake is lighting fast, and grabs her.

I laugh.

“Cool your jets, Cherry. She’s doing it on purpose.”

She looks back at me. I smile and shrug.

“Here’s the deal, slut,” she says. “No one is standing by Ansel. Not King David or Prince Edwin, not Moonshadow, and sure as hell not Full Moon. We can go down the list of the Alliance. You won’t find anyone speaking up for him.”

I don’t answer. She’s right about that.

“Blake’s in on the security community,” Cherry says. “Do you have any idea how many death threats he gets in a typical week? No. And you wouldn’t believe what it looks like now. All these people he pissed off are ready to come after him. Those criminals will kill him if he gets locked up in jail.”

Wind rustles the branches. A few brown leaves float down, landing softly near me and Cherry.

I didn’t realize how bad things could get for Ansel.

“But, I can help him,” Cherry says. “I can actually mend things for him.”

“So help him,” I say. “If you care.”

“My father won’t listen to me,” she says. “Don’t you think I’ve tried?! If we were engaged, it would be different, but Ansel isn’t interested in me. I’ve already tried that, too,” she says, bitterly.

“Ansel and I broke up,” I say. “I’m not in your way.”

“I know you broke up. He told me while we were out in the garden, but it doesn’t matter. As long as you’re around, it will never matter, Karin.” There are tears in her eyes now. “You know, he kissed me yesterday - until he realized you were there.” She wipes the tears off her face.

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I can’t help that, but we really did end things. I won’t be around anymore. And, I have reason to believe, that he was ready to let me go too.” The ground is hard against my ass. I shift slightly to try and get more comfortable. “There was kind of a Rhett Butler moment,” I add.

“What?”

“Never mind,” I say. “Just believe me. It’s through.”

“I know you’re fated mates,” Cherry says. “The only true way is for one of you to die. It will never be over, otherwise.”

“We’re not mates,” I say. “I don’t even have a wolf anymore.”

Cherry and Blake glance at each other.

“I don’t believe you,” Blake says.

“Why would I make that up?”

“Why wouldn’t you,” he asks.

“Listen,” Cherry says. “Ansel won’t even think about an engagement to me, so that I can get my father to help him out of all this hot water. He’d rather be stubborn. He’d rather be righteous. He’d rather be in love with you.”

She stands up. “And it’s all going to cost him his life. My father will help him if we’re engaged. But you have to die. That’s just the way it is. I tried ways around it. There are none.”

I lean my head back against the tree behind me, feeling its rough bark.

She’s a sicko, but she’s right. And maybe there are other ways to save Ansel, but I don’t know what those are. I can’t save my dad and I can’t save him.

Except.

“Cherry,” I say. “If I do it, you have to promise me.”

“What?”

“Don’t hurt Elizabeth. Let her go.”

“Okay.”

“Save Ansel. I know you will, but it bears saying.”

“I will.” She nods. “What else?”

“The last thing is, you have to save my father. His name is Matthew. He’s locked up for gambling debts. The Full Moon pack has him.”

“Okay,” she says.

“It’s a significant amount of money -“

“Hello, princess here.”

All of a sudden the tears come. “You really will… save them both?”

Cherry bends down. “Yes. I really will.”

Two birds. One stone.

“Swear on the Moon Goddess, that you will.”

“I swear on the Moon Goddess that I will save Ansel and your father.”

“And Elizabeth.”

“And Elizabeth,” she says. Her voice is solemn.

“Time to write your note,” Blake says. He cuts through the tape around my arms. I could try to grab him and attack, but without a wolf, I’d never win.

He gives me a notebook and a pen. They stand close, on-guard in case I try something.

I look down at the paper, unsure of what to write.

“Don’t take all day,” Blake says.

“You have to give me a few minutes,” I say. “I’m trying to think.”

“Lie to him,” Cherry says, sharply. “You have to break his heart.”

I shake my head. “No,” I say. The emotion begins to bubble up. “I’m not going to lie to him.”

Not again.

The sadness pours out from a faraway place. One I’d kept locked away. I’m engulfed by it now. It hits my Spock brain, finally. There’s no Ada, but there is love, so much love, it aches.

Tears are hitting the page of the notebook, leaving wet splatters.

“If you don’t, he’ll just grieve you. He may even die from misery,” Cherry says. “He sure as hell won’t feel ready to move on with me! I need you dead and GONE. Stomp on his heart!”

“I get it,” I say. “But I can’t. I can’t lie to him like that.”

“Then all this is for nothing!” Cherry bares her teeth and growls. “He’ll be arrested and probably killed.” She stands back up, seething.

I close my eyes. Tears are still falling down my face.

Hello, emotion.

Despite the pain, I’m glad I’m not ending life numbed out. I still don’t feel like my normal self, but I’m sure as hell feeling this. I hold the sadness and the heartache like old friends.

“Okay,” I say. “I’ll do it.”

I pray to the Moon Goddess for courage. I pray that my father will be both free and well, and will go on to have a happy life. I pray for Ansel’s safety and a beautiful marriage with Cherry, full of all the things I’ve dreamed of for us.

Lastly, I pray for Ada.

Then, I open my eyes and write.