Chapter 58

Claire POV

I sighed as I reached for the phone.

I knew Nathan would be on the other end.

The first time he called, he apologized for his behavior in the parking lot, when he threatened to lock me up in order to keep me from leaving.

It was a brief, awkward conversation. I accepted the apology, but I was still struggling to forgive him for the things he said that day.

The next time he called it was to give me an update on Andy, how he was doing in school. I thanked him for wanting to keep me informed, but it was hard. I wanted to know everything about how Andy was doing…

But it still hurt my heart to think of him, and the days I was missing with my child.

And every day since then, it became clear Nathan only continued to call because he couldn’t let me go.

Or rather, couldn’t stand the idea that he’d had to. Despite all his power and authority - and pride - Nathan hadn’t had a choice in whether or not I stayed in his pack.

Nathan valued his pride, and his reputation. Anything that made him feel weak or insulted stung him deeply.

I didn’t like knowing he was in pain, but I was getting tired of having to deal with my own pain and sadness every time he called.

So I knew, before I picked up the phone, that this was going to have to be our last conversation.

I just couldn’t take it anymore.

We needed to make a clean break.

“Hello, Nathan,” I said, picking up the phone.

“Hello, Claire,” he answered. Even with the distance between us, the sound of his voice so deep and close to my ear filled me with longing.

A longing I just didn’t want to feel. Not anymore.

“Listen,” I said, taking a breath and preparing myself to put a stop to these calls. “We need to talk.”

“I agree,” he cut in quickly. There was a note of excitement in his voice, which confused me.

“That’s why I’m calling,” he continued. “To tell you I’m coming to visit the Royal pack. For business, of course. There’s a border dispute in the high court that I need to attend.

But while I’m there…Claire, I want to see you.”

His news left me speechless.

Nathan was going to be here, in Royal pack territory?

I was torn. Despite everything, I wanted to see him. But I knew doing so could only possibly cause both of us more pain.

But he told me he’d see me tomorrow and said goodnight before I could say anything.

Before I could tell him I didn’t know if I wanted to see him.

Nathan POV

I arrived at the Royal court early, eager to see Claire. The border dispute in the south hadn’t turned violent - yet - but it did mean I had a plausible reason to go travel to the Royal pack.

Part of me had been wanting to come here for days. Just leave, letting my wolf scent the air, tracking the scent of our mate.

Now that I was here, I could admit that the effort not to follow Claire when she left had cost me dearly.

Walking into pack headquarters, I was escorted into the receiving hall where members of the Royal family would greet anyone attending court today.

I wasn’t sure if Claire would be a part of that, since surely she wasn’t going to actually take part in performing any Royal duties.But I thought maybe she’d be there with her father. And if she was, maybe I could get a chance to speak to her privately.

Then I looked up and there she was. My eyes found her as soon as I entered the room.

And I was stunned by what I saw.

I’d been expecting the meek nanny I once knew, or maybe even the busy clinic healer with a stack of patient files in her arms.

Instead I saw a beautiful well-dressed woman sitting at the right hand of the Royal Alpha himself, receiving court attendees, speaking to each with a gentle confidence.

Where I had expected to find the old Claire, the wolfless Omega who avoided eye contact, I found a dazzling Princess comfortable with the power she wielded.

Was this self-possessed person inside of Claire all along, and I just never saw it?

All at once she felt like such a stranger to me. Had I never seen my mate for who she really was?

I joined the line of attendees waiting to speak with the Royals while I watched Claire, trying to deal with my shock. But when I got to the front I realized I had no idea what to say to this brand new woman.

“Nathan, I…” She also seemed at a loss, for a moment. Then she recovered. “How was your journey?”

My journey? I thought, blinking in confusion. Who cares?

“It was fine,” I said, dismissing the topic curtly. “Claire, I need to speak with you. Alone.”

Behind Claire and her father an official cleared his throat. “You will not speak to the Princess with such familiarity, Alpha.”

My wolf growled, annoyed by someone it perceived as trying to step between me and Claire. I eyed the man coldly, then looked back to Claire.

“I’m free once the court session is finished. Meet with me then. I’ll come to the palace, if you’d like.”

Claire hesitated. “Nathan…I just don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Claire - ” I stopped myself, then gritted my teeth. “Princess, we really must speak.”

Why was she refusing me? I was her mate, and her Alpha.

And then I remembered - I wasn’t her Alpha. Not anymore.

I watched her square her shoulders, and when she looked me in the eye again, it was with a confidence she’d never shown before. “Nathan, I’m not going to meet with you.”

I opened my mouth to try to convince her, but a man stepped up beside her.

Standing close enough beside her for their shoulders to touch, he said, “Are you alright, Princess?”

All the while eyeing me up and down as if I might be a threat to her.

“It’s alright, Dr. Baldwin,” she assured him. “Alpha Nathan was just leaving.”

Helpless to do anything else, leaving is exactly what I did.

I returned home that evening feeling tired, and deeply bothered. The border dispute was no closer to being resolved, and with Claire refusing to see me the entire day had been nothing but a wasted effort.

And while the border dispute weighed on me, the encounter with Claire weighed even heavier.

Seeing her like that had been startling. And then with that other man by her side…

I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it all day. I knew I needed to get it together, stop focusing on Claire and give all my energy to my duties, and campaign.

But knowing it and actually doing it were two very different things

Deep inside myself, I wondered if this hollow feeling inside me was a broken heart.

And whether it would go away if I just ignored it long enough.

That evening, while we watched the news together, Andy and I saw Claire on TV during a report on a Royal family event.

Andy was completely stunned.

“What is Nanny doing with the Royal Alpha??”

He assumed she was working as a nanny for the Royals.

“Will she ever come back?!” he cried, his little heart clearly in pain.

Looking at my own pain mirrored in my son’s eyes, I had no idea how to explain what was going on.

For a wild moment I thought about just telling him everything, about Claire actually being my mate - and his real mother.

But what good would that do him?

It would just make him want her more.

And it was more clear than ever that Claire wasn’t coming home any time soon.

I decided that would be too much for him. He was already struggling, no longer excited to see Sabrina when she came to the house, no longer talking about how he wanted Sabrina to be his mommy.

In fact, Andy seemed to actively be avoiding Sabrina, something I found a little worrying.

But like so many things going on in my life, I just didn’t know what to do with it.

“I’m sorry, Andy,” I said. “I don’t think your nanny is going to come back.”

And then I held him while he cried.

Later, after I tucked him into bed, I wandered the house, feeling how empty and lonely it was. I couldn’t help thinking about all the good things she used to do here.

All the many small she’d made it truly feel like a home.

Feeling as miserable as my son, I poured myself yet another drink.

And tried not to think about Claire.

Tried, and failed.